


A Pirate Deserves a Ship

by Zacia



Series: Someone To Care For Verse [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Balthazar has a really dirty mind, Comedy, Human Balthazar, Human Benny, Humor, M/M, Promiscuity, Romance, Sexual Fantasy, oblivious! Benny, slow build sort of, some serious moments
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-21
Updated: 2015-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-05 14:39:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 55,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1822075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zacia/pseuds/Zacia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Balthazar is a simple man and has pretty simple needs. Wild nights, crazy parties and running a bookstore/cafe.<br/>You know? Simple.<br/>A new employee, however, is about to turn his simple life upside down.<br/>Balthazar most certainly isn't pinning over a painfully straight employee.<br/>That would be too complicated and he didn't do complicated.<br/>Will try to update on Mondays (once editing is done. Some things will be shortened and some scenes may change).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

 

          If anyone told him that there would be a man that made his body shiver uncontrollably just by the sound of his voice, he would have laughed in their face. Balthazar was known to be loose, care-free and above all uninvolved. No one had any power over him and his heart never pounded in his chest like some hormonal teenager. Some partners had even said that he was cold or incapable of feelings. However, he knew that wasn't true.

          He loved his family, his job and sex. He really enjoyed sex but hated when he was told how cold he was for not being loving towards them. He wasn't cruel to them or anything. He listened to their problems when they were unhappy, gave them solid advice (if it was one thing he could do, it was give advice) and even helped them along the way. Sure, he didn't see the point in showing affection or acting like he was in love when he wasn't. They knew that he wasn't in love the moment they began the relationship. He made sure they did. Yet, he had been through plenty of “relationships” (mostly sex friends or dating) but none of them seemed to last. Perhaps they thought they could change him and became disappointed when they realized they couldn't. Balthazar just didn't have attachments to others. He didn't bind himself to one person and why should he? No one had exclusive rights to him. He wasn't an object someone could own. He was a person and he was free to find pleasures where he wished.

          So, he played around a bit and even though he teased Dean about being a playboy, he wasn't so different. He was by no means easy. He didn't fall for traps laid by others and wasn't gullible enough to followed them to bed. He didn't allow himself to be used by anyone for anything that didn't benefit him in anyway. No, he was the one in control at all times and never went for sex unless that was his goal from the beginning.

          He frequented clubs because he loved to dance. He loved the rush he got in a night club. It was noisy, sweaty and alive. It was much better than the stuffy family he grew up with back home. Moving to the states was one of the best things he had ever done. People weren't so strictly polite here unlike his proper family and their high status back home. In the states, no one knew who he was and didn't treat him like some outsider. Of course, that was after their fascination with his accent. That accent broke the ice better than any conversational tool. Then there was the club scene. The people there were a breed of their own. They were friendly, loud and so terribly rude. He loved it.

          Oh, how he enjoyed their lewd comments and how they got to point when they spoke. Sometimes they were overly familiar. He learned the hard way that sometimes he would befriend someone and suddenly they spoke about (in detail) their sex life, toilet experience and other subjects that were best to be kept to themselves. Perhaps they were too friendly in this area.

          He quickly adapted to the crazy scene and was known throughout the clubs as the most adventurous of lovers. He was usually interested in male company but had once or twice been a part of a rather interesting nights that involved the participation of several women as well as men. Of course, his adventures had risks and he did his best to reduce those. Just last week, he went to the clinic and was proud to say that despite his antics, he was still clean. Some may frown upon his chosen lifestyle. He knew if his family back at home knew, they would faint at the very mention of one of his lovely nights. He was loose, unattached and in control. Balthazar was very much in control of himself and his life.

          So, it was shocking to find himself speechless in front of a stranger. The man had entered normal enough. In fact, Balthazar had barely noticed him before he spoke. He was a busy man and had a bookstore and cafe to run. He was never the one to take orders. Balthazar hated the idea of submitting to anyone and therefore decided it was best to never have that situation arise. He owned his own business after some helpful loans from his cousin, Gabriel. He wore what he wanted to wear to work and encouraged his employees to do the same. Nothing too distracting of course. He didn't need to scare customers away. However, he was a rather lax boss and his employees seemed to respect him. Things seemed to be going alright and business was picking up. However, he needed help in the cafe desperately.

          Even now, he stood with an arm full of small plates and saucers. In his fingers, he held each mug and tea cup by their handles. He was used to this. After all, when he started it was just him, Castiel and Ruby. Ruby's work ethic was something that could use an improvement but he couldn't expect much from a woman he met in an alley way. She was the only one willing to work without knowing how much pay to expect and she did do her job in the end. She had a weird addiction to energy drinks and kept trying to pass on some to anyone who would listen. It was some ghastly red substance that she swore was much better than Red Bull. Even with all that energy, she was still slow to work and mostly just listened to music on her mp3 player. College students.

          He was the only one in the cafe in the beginning as Castiel was nowhere near as clean as he was now. He had to thank Dean for showing his baby cousin what it meant to be human. He was accustomed to being the only person in the cafe and having to balance the plates on his own. However, that was before business picked up.

          He was pretty sure it was all due to Sam and Jessica's recommendations to their friends. He didn't know whether to thank them or make them pay. He supposed once he found his new employee, he would have to figure it out then. It wasn't just three employees any longer. He had Charlie, Violet and David also working there. Unfortunately, only Charlie would help in the cafe.

          He had heard someone clear his throat but he didn't pay it any mind. He was too busy balancing the large stack of plates in his arms and attempting to place down the cups near the sink towards the counter. There was a bigger sink in the back but he needed to get some of the load off of him.

          “I heard there was some employment opportunities here.” The voice put a delightful shiver down Balthazar spine causing dropping everything in his hands. All the plates crashed to the floor breaking into pieces. They were going to have to buy complete new ones and there was a mess all over the floor. But he couldn't help it. The accent that man had sounded thick and smooth like maple syrup. He just wanted it poured all over him. Looking over at the man, he wouldn't mind pouring it all over him either.

          The man was nothing like Balthazar's usual types. He had a thing for twinks, pretty boys and business men types. What can he say? He likes having a lot of options. However, none of those options included a man that resembled a big teddy bear. He had icy blue eyes and a sweet smile. He was a bit scruffy and usually, Balthazar didn't do facial hair. However, he couldn't help but wonder what that beard felt like on his skin. And those antiquated clothes. Balthazar wouldn't be caught dead with someone with such bad fashion sense before but that was before this specimen walked in. He was more interested in what was underneath those clothing more than how they looked.

          “Are you alright?”The question jolted Balthazar out of his strange fantasy and he tried desperately to look like he wasn't just having sexual thoughts about a potential employee. Ignoring the man, he dropped down to pick up the pieces. He couldn't believe he had zoned out there even if it was for a small moment. He heard some footsteps and soon the man was crouched beside him. He smelled as manly as he looked. Balthazar began to blush as he started to feel embarrassed for thinking naughty thoughts about the stranger. He was glad he wasn't able to read his mind but he still blushed all the same. He needed to say something. Anything.

          “Nice accent.” More like hot, sexy accent that he wouldn't mind hearing moaning his name loudly but there was no way Balthazar could say that. He didn't even know if this southern man candy even swung his way. He didn't want to scare him off. He focused on the broken pieces and tried not to look at him.

          “Same to you, brother.” The man chuckled in a way that sounded so sweet Balthazar was tempted to taste it. He wasn't even one with a sweet tooth , his cousin had that problem, but he sure was thinking of gaining one soon. Looking over at the man, he noticed he wasn't even paying attention to him. The man was busy looking for a dust pan that he didn't even notice Balthazar's attention. It was better that way. It would be terribly awkward if the man noticed the way he was most likely undressing him with his eyes.

          He was glad he had a regular old dust pan that you had to bend down to use. It gave Balthazar such a wonderful view of this newcomer's backside and what a fine backside it was. The man should be prohibited from wearing lose fitting pants because he was sure it would look even nicer if only they were tighter. The man turned around with the dust pan in hand, causing Balthazar immediately. _Calm down._ He told himself. _Try not to make it seem like you were staring at his plump, perfect little-_

         “So, part time employment. Did I hear wrong?” He most certainly hadn't. Balthazar didn't know a thing about the man, except his apparent sex appeal, but he knew he couldn't let him slip from his grasps. No one slips from his grasps.

          “No, you heard right.” He stood up to get a better view of the man and he was such a sight to behold. He looked so solid yet so squish-able. Was that even a word? Balthazar didn't know but he didn't even care. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms and possibly his legs around that man. Oh, he looked strong too. He could totally see the man throwing him onto a bed and having his way with him. He didn't care if he was the bottom either. He would gladly bottom for a man like that. He couldn't wait to have that man near him at all hours of the day. Have some nice eye candy while he worked. “You start tomorrow.”

          “Don't I need an interview?” The man asked looking a mix of nervous and confused. Balthazar flushed immediately. He was so busy thinking about how delicious the man looked, that he didn't even think to properly interview him. He had no idea if the man had any of the required skills to help with the cafe. Looking at his strong arms, he really didn't care if he had the necessary skills. He could just hug him from behind all day and he would pay him gladly.

          “Right, interview.” He tried to look anywhere but the man's face especially with the dirty thoughts running through his head. He absolutely needed this guy in his store. He didn't care if he had to make him do Castiel's old job of straightening up books and make Ruby get off her butt and make coffee, he wanted him. He'll regret it later but right now, this was the best decision he ever made. “Do you want the job?”

          “Well, yeah.” The man responded with a shrug. He still looked deliciously confused. The poor man wouldn't know what hit him. He sincerely hoped he had some baking talent or something so he would have to be in the kitchen all the time. The kitchen area was so narrow, anyone could bump into each other by accident.

          “Interview done.” He was practically singing the phrase as he smiled at the thought of all the scenarios he could get closer to the man. “Start tomorrow.”

          The man looked shocked by how easily he got the job but didn't seem less than pleased with the decision. Balthazar started to wonder if the man even swung his way. What if he didn't? Balthazar didn't do complicated. He was a simple man with simple needs. He never ever had a problem getting a man or woman in bed. He preferred men but he wouldn't deny a woman of carnal pleasures, especially if she had a smoking hot boyfriend that wouldn't mind a little excitement in his life. He went with people looking for the same excitement he was, there were many in this city, and never had a hook up outside the club scene. This was a bit more complicated. There was a good chance this man didn't swing his way but that didn't mean he couldn't look. _And touch._ He mused. _Purely by accident of course._

          “I'm Benny.” The man extended his hand towards him and Balthazar nodded to himself. It would be prudent to know the name of the man he'd be pleasuring himself to tonight.

          “Balthazar.” He responded with a slight smile. _Remember it. You'll be screaming it later._ He slowly placed his hand softly into the Benny's and the man didn't disappoint. His hand was warm but not sweaty and his grip was strong. There was a few things he could think the man could do with a grip like that and none of them were appropriate for polite conversation.

          “That's quite a name.” That smile Benny had should be outlawed immediately. It melted Balthazar's insides almost instantaneously and he had a hard time thinking coherently. When he did think, all he could focus on was Benny's insinuation that his name may be hard to pronounce. _It's okay, Benny._ He wanted to say but left it in his thoughts. _You just need to say that name multiple times to get the hang of it. Come into the back and I can help you with that._

          Any other day, he would be able to smoothly say the line without any fear. He would be able to put his best smile on and flirt shamelessly. The words were there and he was no stranger to the movements but it stayed in his thoughts. He found himself tongue tied and smiled wide like a complete idiot. When he noticed how he could possibly look to the man, he looked down a little embarrassed.

          “Well, I suppose it is.” Was all he could say. It was completely devoid of any flirtations or innuendo. His mind was basically making a porno and his mouth was being all prim and polite. What was going on? This had never happened before. He just needed to clear his mind. Obviously, standing so close to such a man with such a lovely manly scent and a voice that could melt butter was doing things to his brain. He reluctantly took his hand back from the man forgetting he had left it in the man's warm palm. Benny just smiled and told him he would return. Balthazar wasn't sure what had just happened or how he said goodbye but some how he did.

          His shift was almost over anyway. Charlie would be coming soon to take over and he could go home. He rushed to clean up the area and get back to work but never got his mind off the southern man. When he finally got home that night, he decided to make the man star in his fantasies before turning in early for the first time in years. Had to be ready to see his cute new employee.

          Thus ended the day Balthazar decided to ruin his life.

                   He just didn't know that he did, yet.

 

 


	2. Rule Number One: No Emotional Involvement

 

           What was he thinking? How could he have imagined this would possibly work out? There was no way he could handle being so close to his new employee without losing all his sanity. Did the man have to roll up his sleeves to his bicep? Did the man have to have such strong arms? Balthazar groaned. He wanted those arms around him.

           He wanted more than just those arms around him. He wanted those nice rough looking hands all over his body, pinning him down. He would love to be pinned down on the bed, writhing underneath him. He would love that smooth, deep southern accent whispering dirty things in his ear. He shook his head. He had to concentrate. He owned a business and couldn't let it go to hell because of his sinful fantasies.

          He watched the man lift up a box of cream, brought by the truck earlier that day, with ease. He took in the movement of the muscles under his skin and he couldn't help but want to trace his hands over them. Those arms were becoming too much of a distraction. In fact, he couldn't resist any longer. He walked behind Benny and slid his hand over his forearm causing the other man to jump slightly.

          “Let me help with that.” He told his worker calmly trying to pretend he didn't enjoy the feel of the man's arm under his finger tips. He hoped Benny wouldn't get him for sexual harassment that wouldn't do the business any good.“You just started working. It would- uh be.” He had to look at him with those soft, innocent looking blue eyes. Oh, he looked like he was just waiting to be tainted. A big old teddy bear wanting to be cuddled all night long. Balthazar had to get a hold of himself. He couldn't be thinking these things right as he is looking at him. He blushed feeling like he had gotten caught, even though he knew Benny couldn't read his thoughts, and tried reaching for the box in the man's hands. He needed to distract himself from looking up at his eyes. “It would be, um, too much to ask you to do all this work.”

           “It's alright, Balth.” Benny said in that sweet tone of his. Balthazar was amazed the man didn't even notice how his voice affected him. He was a thespian back in school but he never really thought his acting ability was that great. Clearly, he should have pursued the art since Benny seemed completely oblivious to his attraction.“I'm not much on making coffee. I don't know a damn thing besides regular filter types. But I do know how to cook and lift things. Let me help out a bit. I feel silly just standing around watching you work.”

           “Well, alright.” Balthazar really didn't mind Benny standing around watching him. He actually felt a tingle of excitement rush through him as he thought of the man watching his every move. Should he test the waters and try to see if he might be enticed by him? No, that would be unprofessional. Seducing would have to be done off the clock.“When you're done you can um set up the tables in the dining area.”

           “Alright.” Benny smiled at him as he moved towards the dining area. Why was he allowed to smile? He should be banned from doing such blinding things. Balthazar smiled back a little distracted and moved away. He had to stock the display area to be ready for customers. “Do you only sell confections you buy?”

            Balthazar had to hide a smile when he heard Benny ask. It meant he was looking at him while he was setting up the tables. Sure, he was probably just trying to see how things were done but Balthazar could dream. He could imagine that the man was interested. It made work much less boring.

           “Well, I know how to make muffins but that's about it.” Balthazar admitted with a sigh. They had an oven and yet, he only knew how to make one thing. “Also, I do prepare the sandwiches before hand.”

          “It be cheaper to make the other stuff too.” Benny suggested. Balthazar did agree. It could possibly be cheaper and he'd be able to make to order how many was needed that day. If they needed more he could whip up some more and the ingredients could roll over to the next week and so on. No more frozen deserts that need to be thawed out.

         “Can you bake?” Hot and talented. This man was going to be the death of him. Benny smiled shyly and looked down. Another smile that might be the death of him.

       “I can make pies but cooking meals are more my speed.” Benny admitted with a small blush brushing his cheeks. He looked adorable.

      “Well, this is a cafe not a restaurant.” Balthazar informed him but paused when he saw disappointment flash in Benny's eyes. This wasn't like him. He didn't allow his employees to get in the way with how he did things. This was his business and he did things his way. He was his own boss. However, when he looked into the man's eyes, he could feel this desire to please creeping up on him. He found himself saying softly words he never thought he'd say to a new employee. “But maybe we can talk about things we could make.”

     “Sure thing, Balth.” Benny grinned happily. Balthazar felt faint. He only knew this man for a whole of one day. There was no way he could allow any of this to happen. This was wrong. He was the boss here.. He couldn't let Benny affect him anymore. It's one thing to be a hot piece of ass but a complete other now that Balthazar realized what he had done. He wasn't going to let this man walk all over him and make him turn into putty. He never turns into putty. Benny was starting to look at him concerned. “Are you okay?”

     Balthazar couldn't answer that question. He was pretty sure he wasn't okay and he never would be okay. Not as long as Benny kept looking so damn delicious. Why did he look so delicious? He wasn't even his type. It had to be that exotic, southern man thing he had going for him. Balthazar did like them exotic at times. He hadn't had a good lay in a while. He had just been busy with his work and all. That was probably the problem. He just needed to find someone, bed them and this would all be over. He could probably find someone in his contacts that may be willing to stop by his apartment. He didn't really have to stay here and supervise if someone else came in to work.

     The door opened slowly behind him causing Balthazar to sigh in relief. Good a distraction. Anything to stop him from thinking about his pretty kinky stereotypes of southern gentlemen and the discomfort of his increasingly tighter pants. He expected Ruby coming in for her shift but was pleasantly surprised to find his cousin walking through the door. This was even better.

    “Cassie!” He exclaimed probably more happy than he should be. His cousin narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Castiel wasn't ever one to pick up on things but this must have been an exception. Unless, Balthazar wasn't as subtle as he thought he was. No, he was the very picture of subtle. Castiel must be confused by his jovial greeting. “Welcome to work. We have a new employee and I would love if you help train him.”

    “Sure, I can do that.” Castiel told him with a smile. Balthazar was thrilled. He really needed to get out of there any longer and he wouldn't be able to contain himself. He pushed his cousin along towards the kitchen. Castiel stopped the moment he saw Benny. “Oh.”

    “Oh?” Balthazar was confused. It seemed his cousin was staring at his new employee. Was he affected too? Did this man have some secret sex appeal that affected everyone who saw him?

    “Hey, I know you.” Benny smiled at the sight of Castiel but it seemed a little forced. “We live in the same apartment building.”

    “That is correct.” Castiel nodded and turned to look at Balthazar. The latter was too busy being shocked by this new information. Benny lived in the same building as his cousin? How could his cousin neglect to tell him about this southern god living in his building? What kind of cousin was he? This was something you told people!

    “Well, Cassie here is going to help train you a bit.” Balthazar explained and Benny nodded obediently. He wouldn't mind if the man liked being obedient to him. He did like his partners to be obedient. Benny would be perfect if he was but then again, he wouldn't mind him taking charge. No. It was that sort of thinking that has made him so frustrated at the moment. It was the whole reason he was leaving. He needed to do something about this. “I have matters to attend to.”

    “Wait, Balthazar. How do I 'train' someone?” Castiel called after him and he swore he heard Benny chuckle. He was sure they would be alright. It wasn't like Castiel could blow up the place and Ruby would make sure everything wasn't going to crap. Well, he hoped.

    He needed to do something about this frustration he felt. He should have never hired that man. All he was doing was making him hotter than their oven and he just finished making muffins in there a moments before Benny came in for work. He couldn't believe he just thought that.

    Shaking his head, he fished into his pocket. He needed to call someone he knew could help him with his frustrations. Inias was a new friend he could count on for casual sex. He didn't meet him in the clubs like his other partners. No, he met this sweet, young thing at the cafe. He was a college student that loved his lattes. He was everything Balthazar liked in a partner. He was slender with soft features and completely adorable. He was barely in his twenties and he shaved quite frequently. Hairless. It was something Balthazar usually appreciated in a bed warmer. Benny was like a bear compared to Inias. He still couldn't figure why he was attracted to that man.

    Inias was lovely and so agreeable. He was going for a masters or something. It was in business but he couldn't remember if he was going for an masters in business or what. Balthazar never really paid attention but Inias always liked talking about it. He always tried to emphasize how much money he would make. It was strange because the kid never really seemed like much of a bragger until recently.

    Regardless of all that, he was a perfect partner. He was so easily mold-able allowing Balthazar to do any position he wanted. Adventurous Inias was and so very obedient. He loved it when they were obedient. The moment he called him up, the younger man dropped everything. Balthazar didn't even know if he had class this morning but it didn't seem to matter since Inias said he would clean himself up and meet him at his apartment. If he did have class, it was most likely unimportant.

     Balthazar lived in a studio apartment with a loft. He didn't live in the same building as his cousins but he counted that as a blessing. It was very hard to find a building his cousin's didn't own. The whole city was almost completely in their pocket. It was ridiculous. However, he was successful with his cute little apartment near one of the parks. The management sucked but at least he didn't feel like he owed his family anything.

    Inias was sitting at the door when he arrived. The man wore his clothes like he placed them on hastily. The ensemble didn't even seem to go together. He probably rushed out of his apartment after cleaning himself. He gave him a shy smile when he saw Balthazar. He was like the complete opposite of Benny. Perhaps, it was really all in the accent when it came to his new employee. If Inias had that accent, would he feel the same way?

    Kissing Inias was like brushing against rose petals. His lips were so soft and each kiss was barely with any force. Balthazar was the one who had to deepen the kiss and bring any passion into it. Inias could only provide innocent little brushes and delicious moans. He was completely at his mercy.

     Benny would be nothing like Inias. A strong man like him would never let himself be controlled by him. He would probably be forceful. He'd probably pin Balthazar against the wall and ravage his mouth like if he was starved of touch. Balthazar would be the one helpless against him, moaning like Inias. Benny's last name was french after all and boy, did that put more naughty thoughts in his head causing him to moan.

     Inias had no idea who he was thinking of. He pulled away with a soft smile as Balthazar began to open his door. They had made quite a scene for his neighbors. Perhaps the soccer mom down the hall got a nice look. She was so infuriatingly against people like Balthazar. Served her right to get tickets to the show.

    He lead Inias towards his loft. The boy had been there many times before and has woken up plenty of mornings there alone. Balthazar was a busy man and would usually leave early in the morning before Inias would wake up. The boy was very diligent; cleaning up and locking the door behind him. He was one of the few friends he could trust with his home.

    The way Inias felt underneath him was perfect to sway his mind away from his employee. The soft moans the boy emitted were so wonderful. He loved being handled in such a slow rhythm giving time for Balthazar to roam his hands down his smooth body. He took such good care of himself and was never too loud for the neighbors. Balthazar didn't mind the loud partner in bed but there was something endearing with how meek Inias was in and out of bed. He was like something pure he corrupted every time he laid in his bed.

    Benny probably wouldn't be like this at all and Balthazar would be grateful for it. A man with a voice like his should be as loud as possible. He would want Benny to keep talking; maybe say a bunch of dirty things with that accent of his. Oh that accent of his would keep him going even if it was the only thing happening. He could probably get off on that voice with no problems at all. He wouldn't be gentle like Balthazar was when he laid Inias down. He would probably push him down into his plush bed and kiss him until he was breathless. The man was strong and his hold could most likely leave bruises. Balthazar was a pretty open man and he was not against being marked all over. Benny would probably manhandle him into position and thrust wildly into him. Oh, he would take him like an animal. He knew there had to be some animal under that sweet disguise. It would be rough and savage giving Balthazar things he never thought he needed before.

    The thought of all that drove him over the edge and he found himself climaxing harder than he ever had with any of his partners. It was downright shameful. He called Inias to get his mind off of Benny. He wanted to calm his system down so that he could be a proper boss to the guy without thinking of him naked all the time. Instead, this seemed to have made it worse.

    Inias was always his best. Out of all his partners, he was the one that he had enjoyed the most. However, he didn't pay attention to him even when he was below him writhing in pleasure. All he could think about was his new employee. An employee he hadn't even known long enough to have him affect him this way.

    Maybe he was getting old. He was getting old there was no doubt about it. He was in his forties, forty-five to be exact. Maybe it was his subconscious telling him he was too old to be playing around with young things. That he should go down a different path. A path that lead to a very hot, southern gentleman.

    He felt this urge to return to work. It was irresponsible of him to leave Benny in the incapable hands of his cousin. He knew it wasn't like an apocalypse had been unleashed in his cafe but Castiel probably just worked without instructing the new hire at all. It was a complete disservice to Benny. He should go back and see how things were doing after he showered, of course. When he moved to slide off the bed, a hand touched his wrist softly.

    “Where are you going?” Inias asked with a hint of worry in his voice. Balthazar shook his head and smiled.

    “I have a store to run.” It should be reason enough. Inias was young but not too young to not know how businesses were run. The boy was a business major after all. However, when he tried to scoot off the bed again the hold only got tighter. What was he doing? Inias was always shy and meek. It was a miracle that Balthazar could even get such a sweet kid in bed with him. They usually shied away from casual sex.

   “Stay a bit longer.” He knew that tone. It was a tone that held some sort of longing. Balthazar knew he shouldn't have initiated anything with the boy. He should have known by the way he blushed when he saw him and how he would watch him as he worked that the boy had intended for something more from the beginning. He just thought he had been clear about his boundaries.

    “I can't.” He knew the boy was probably looking very sad but he didn't want to look behind him. He may have to delete this contact now. He couldn't have them getting too attached to him. Inias was a good boy with a great future ahead of him. He would find someone else. “This is just sex, remember.” The boy's hold on his wrist loosen and he heard a soft, sad little sigh come from him. It was a pity. He was rather good in bed. “Lock the door behind you.”

    “Yes, sir.” So, obedient but that's just how it went. Balthazar wasn't going to be held responsible because a kid couldn't keep his emotions in check. Benny would be no different. If he did choose his employee to be his new bed warmer at night, he would have to adhere to the same rules. Balthazar didn't do love, it was way too messy, and even though he was attracted to the southern man, he definitely didn't feel anything for him. How could he? He didn't even really know the man.

    No, he was in lust. Complete unadulterated lust and he couldn't control himself. Having Benny in the sack may stop all his fantasies about him but he would have to approach the situation cautiously. The man certainly wouldn't be like any of his previous partners. Balthazar wondered if he would be more or less adventurous. Maybe there was some hidden, kinky man under that teddy bear exterior. The whole idea was fascinating but Balthazar couldn't fathom why. The man still wasn't anything he enjoyed in men.

    Perhaps after his time with Inias, he would come to his senses. Sure, he thought of Benny the entire time but that was fantasy!Benny. It wasn't the real deal. Maybe after being with something so soft and supple, seeing the man won't do anything for him. He could only hope.

    He was dead wrong. It had to be some sort of illusion but some how Benny was ten times sexier than before. Perhaps it was because he was the unknown. Balthazar couldn't recall having a rough looking southern gentleman in his bed before. He was, of course, always willing to try new things. Benny was leaning over the counter talking to a female customer. He didn't know what they were speaking about but it didn't seem important since he immediately shifted his attention to him when he heard the door open.

    “Hey, Balth.” His smile was still so bright and sweet. Balthazar was beginning to think he smiled like that on purpose. The man gestured behind him to Castiel, who was hastily taking off his breakfast. “Castiel was about to go on his break. Glad you came. I wouldn't know what to do otherwise.”

      What time was it? Noon? Was it his lunch break already? Of course, Castiel wouldn't be trying to leave unless it was. He was quite eager too. Probably to stare longingly into Dean's big green eyes and engage in copious amount of eye sex. Seriously, the two dance around each other afraid to say a word. Their unresolved sexual tension must be getting him. Maybe he was getting frustrated based on their frustrations. Wouldn't surprise him. He just needed that ship to sail soon. The sooner the better. 

     Benny was looking at him expectantly and he had almost forgotten that the man had spoken to him. Clearing his throat, Balthazar couldn't look him in the eye. Even the thought of his favorite ship didn't deter him from the fact he had just come back after some personal time. He just couldn't have a normal conversation with someone he had spent the last couple of hours fantasizing about.

    “Yes, of course.” He couldn't help it, he blushed. He knew it was silly but he felt like Benny knew what he was up to. It was completely ridiculous and he probably looked as silly as he felt. The man didn't seem to mind as he turned back to the female customer.

     Balthazar hadn't really put much attention to her but she was dangerously close to Benny even with the counter in the way. She could have fallen on top of it at any moment. He wouldn't blame her if she did. If he was a customer, he'd probably do the same thing just to get close to a guy like Benny. That accent must have done wonders for countless men and women, he bet.

    “I'll see you later, Elizabeth.” Benny apparently got her name some how. At least, that was what Balthazar would have thought if he didn't sound like he had said her name a thousand times.

    “Oh, alright.” The young woman said and planted a kiss on his employee's cheek. How very forward the youth of today had become! “Work hard! I'm so proud of you.”

    “Get out of here.” The man chuckled and looked down shyly. No doubt he knew her. She was a pretty, young woman with long, straight, brown hair and beautiful light eyes. She was probably around Inias's age. An old man like him probably couldn't compete with that. Not that he wanted to.  

    There was no need for attachments. So, his employee was probably straight. So, he had a very attractive, young lover. Probably. It didn't matter at all. He just found him attractive, that's all. If they were to have been anything, it would have just been sex. Probably, sex like he had never had before but it would have still been sex. So, why did his chest feel so tight?

     This was bad. Really bad.

 

 


	3. Rule number two: Don't get Involved with the Family

             Of course, he had someone. A man like him couldn't possibly be single. He should have known that from the beginning. It didn't matter. Why would it matter? It wasn't a crime to look or fantasize and it wasn't like he had feelings for the guy. He would just have to bury his attraction.

             Benny wasn't making it easier, he swore that the man had hiked up his sleeves even higher this morning. It was like he knew his muscles were Balthazar's weakness and he was teasing him. Those were someone else's muscles to touch, not his. He shouldn't even be looking at them. He tried his best to avert his eyes from them but he caught him smiling happily. No, that smile was meant for someone else. It was best not to look at that either.

             He had come to work early again but so did his cousin. Therefore, it wasn't anything Balthazar could get his hopes up about. He was just being very diligent in his work which was something he liked in his employees even if it didn't seem so. When he walked in, Castiel was already chatting away with the handsome man. It almost looked like he was really training him.

           Castiel, yesterday, had only walked him through cleaning the counter. Balthazar was pretty sure he didn't even do that and Benny was just being nice about it. After all, he doubted the man knew what training was. He probably looked it up last night on the internet, like he normally did when he had inquires, as he was trying to walk Benny through cleaning one of the machines.

             Benny looked sufficiently confused. Castiel probably had no experience explaining things and was most likely just saying a bunch of stuff that went over the man's head. He still laughed despite it and even said a few things to Castiel that caused him to laugh as well. Balthazar was surprised. When he made a joke, Castiel would just look at him confused. What the heck was Benny saying?

             The two of them knew each other before he came to work. Balthazar wasn't sure how much they knew about each other but it was definitely enough to recognize each other at first glance. There were people he had lain with in bed that he couldn't remember at first glance. Then again, it could just be Castiel's weird photographic memory. The man could see a person once and remember them for a life time.

            They didn't seem like they knew each other very well but still chatted happily. Well, somewhat happily. As the day began and customers kept coming in, Castiel was starting to resemble a lost puppy more and more. Benny seemed to mirror the same lost look though he had more reason to don one. Castiel knew how things went in the cafe, Benny didn't. Balthazar always found it humorous that his cousin always looked lost no matter how much he understood something.

             On a normal day, Balthazar would have smiled knowing he was waiting for Dean. However, he had heard from Sam last night that Dean had left to visit a friend. So, why did Castiel wait like he always did? Did he not know? That was ridiculous. Dean wouldn't have not informed Castiel about his departure. He wasn't that cruel.

             The closer it got to lunch the more he began to realize that Dean needed a swift kick in the rear. He no longer was distracted by Benny's strong arms and handsome smile. If the circumstances were different and his cousin wasn't suffering, he would have been very thankful for. It would have taken all of his willpower to ignore that walking sex otherwise. However, he didn't have time to think of that. He had a cousin in need of some cheering up. When lunch finally arrived, Castiel looked completely confused. Dean didn't tell him. That little bastard.

             “Hey, Balth.” He was sure he never heard his name sound better than rolled off his employee's tongue. Benny was actually just calling for him but that accent made everyone's name sound a lot better. Balthazar turned and noticed Benny staring down at the glass display. “Is this fine the way I set it up. I mean I followed the signs but we didn't have anymore bagels so I just switched it out with some cookies.”

             “Uh, yes.” This had to get better. There was no way he could survive if he kept forgetting how to speak in his presence. “That-That's fine.”

             “Is something wrong?” Benny looked concerned. Balthazar couldn't blame him since he was acting rather peculiar every time he saw the man. Just once he would like not to make himself look like a complete idiot in front of him. It didn't matter anyway. Benny was straight, after all.

             “No, nothing is wrong.” He tried lying but Benny didn't seem too convinced. It wasn't like he could just say what was really bothering him. Something told him that saying 'I'm sexually frustrated because you're so hot' wouldn't blow over well. So, he had to think of another lie. Well, it wasn't a complete lie because he did feel concern for his cousin but it wasn't why he stammered. “Cassie seems sad.”

             “Where's Dean?” Benny did seem to pick up on things nicely. Balthazar could practically feel himself begin to swoon. Benny was so smart too. Handsome, exotic,- No, he wouldn't do that. He wasn't going to start acting like a teenager especially over a painfully straight man. “Doesn't he usually come pick him up or was that just yesterday?”

             “He's on a trip, I think.” Balthazar adverted his eyes over to his cousin. Castiel just sighed heavily again. He couldn't wait until Dean got back. Not just because Castiel would be happier but also, because Balthazar couldn't wait to give that man a piece of his mind.

             “Maybe he just misses him.” Benny reasoned and it did sound like it could happen. Castiel had a habit of wearing his heart on his sleeve. However, he knew he wouldn't be checking the clock so obsessively if that was the case.

             “Maybe.” Balthazar sighed. He really shouldn't be bothering Benny with something like this anyway. He can't drag Benny into the affairs of his family. It was a rule of his not to get anyone involved in his personal life. If people, friends and partners were all kept in arm's length there would be less complications. Benny was just his employee and though Castiel was a coworker, it really wasn't any of his business. He should refrain from talking about problems Castiel may have. Best not bring Benny in at all especially when talking to him was only making his body feel hotter. He shook his head. He just needed to get over this silly fancy of his and focus on more attainable men.

             “Hey, you don't have to worry about it.”He felt a warm hand grip his shoulder and his breath hitched. It wasn't like Benny was gripping him with all his power and Balthazar was sure he was just trying to reassure him. However, his shirt was made of some rather thin material. He could feel the heat coming off those palms and those callouses. The things his mind were showing him that that hand could do was more than unprofessional. He could just imagine that hand sliding down and into his pants. In fact, he seemed to be anticipating it but Benny just spoke again. “I'm sure he'll be alright.”

             “I just remembered I had a thing.” Balthazar had realized his body was reacting to Benny's touch in a way that would become obvious rather quickly. He needed to get out of there. The office. He could hide in his office near the back of the kitchen. “Yes, quite an important thing.”

             “Oh, is that right?” Benny didn't seem convinced and Balthazar thanked the heavens that the man was giving him nothing but eye contact. He was pretty sure with the tight pants he liked to wear, it was going to be more than obvious. He might as well just take them off. Well, he would if Benny wouldn't mind but the man was straight. That woman that came in clearly proved that. What if he was bisexual? Maybe he would be happy to help- No. He was not going to sexually harass his employee.

             “Yes, in the back.” He told him rather quickly as he raced towards the office. “Don't disturb me.”

             “Right.” As he closed the door, he could see a look of confusion on Benny's face. He didn't need to be thinking about that right now. He had to get his thoughts clear away from Benny's face. Maybe something else that wouldn't be as enticing.

             This was the problem when you were as adventurous as Balthazar. Not many things are off your list. He tended to like younger men. Maybe if he thought of an older man. No, there have been rather fine older men. It isn't what he usually did but it wasn't something he hadn't done. Maybe if he thought about that rather disgusting fellow that came on too strong. What was his name? Crowley? He was so creepy.

             After a few breaths and some very horrible visual images, Balthazar believed he was ready to venture out. But was it really necessary? He was sure the two could handle the outside on their own. Benny didn't have much to do since he hadn't learned how to make the drinks yet. He just restocked and cleaned up. Sometimes he'd take an order but Castiel was the one that made it. It wasn't too busy. They could handle it but Castiel should take his break. Even without Dean, working so hard for so long isn't healthy and he needs to eat something. Sighing, Balthazar walked out of the office.

             Benny was off cleaning some tables, so he didn't have to worry about bumping into him. However, there was someone else he hadn't even thought of seeing that day. When he approached the counter, he saw Inias smiling happily as he chatted away with Castiel. Since the day he and Inias began their arrangement, Inias hadn't gone back to the cafe. They had basically made an unspoken rule to keep out of each others' lives unless called. Well, Balthazar thought they had made it clear. Castiel use to work in the back when he first met Inias. This wasn't good.

             “What are you doing here?” Balthazar admitted he may have sounded much more tense than he wished to sound. Inias looked up at him with those wide eyes a little confused.

             “I just wanted some coffee to stay awake in class.” Of course, students love to get coffee but he hadn't shown up at all since their arrangements why start now? Balthazar wondered where he had been getting his coffee from if not from his cafe. Inias just didn't show up after a while. Now he was here, staring at him like this was the most normal thing in the world. “I didn't know your cousin worked here.”

             “How long have you guys been talking?” Not getting involved with family is not an unspoken rule. It was a clear rule that he had spoken with Inias about. It makes it harder to break easily when family is involved. Makes the whole arrangement complicated and that was everything Balthazar didn't want it to be.

             “Just a little while. Inias seems pleasant.” Castiel explained as he prepared Inias's drink. Inias looked a little guilty as he should. Balthazar had warned him about the consequences of breaking a rule. They can't keep the arrangement anymore if Castiel knows about it. Poor Castiel. He barely understands his own sexuality and to be thrust into Balthazar's world would be too much for him. He had to keep what he did away from him and anyone else he treasured. “You're friends?”

             “Well, you could put it that way.” He grabbed the cup from Castiel and placed it in front of the customer. That's all he was right now. Just a customer. He was going to cease calling him anyway. Inias was getting too attached for his liking. “I'll see you around then, Inias.”

             “Oh, right.” Inias went to grab his cup with one hand but let his other slide down Balthazar's arm. He was lucky Castiel didn't know what that gesture meant. The poor innocent soul. He turned to make sure Castiel was as clueless as ever but noticed Benny looking over instead. He looked so confused about the gesture. Balthazar could feel his whole face redden. Inias moved in close and whispered. “Don't wait too long to call me.”

             He needed to get out of there. Sure, Inias was leaving but he really didn't want to explain what just happened to Benny. He'd rather just hide somewhere for a little while and try to pretend he didn't exist. It might work. Maybe. Not really.

             “I need fresh air.” He commented looking over at his cousin. “Castiel, do you want to take your break first or...”

             “No, I want to wait longer.” Castiel looked back at the clock as if it had all the answers. Poor, naive Castiel. Dean wasn't going to come for him and he just couldn't understand it. Balthazar felt for him. He really did but he had his own situation that needed taking care of.

             “Alright.” He nodded and gave his cousin a sympathetic pat. “I'll be back.”

             “Where are you going?” Benny called like if he was a lost child without him. That would be rather flattering to be needed so much but Benny was a grown man and could handle himself. Besides, he had to figure out his emotions quick. He can't just be this way anymore. He didn't know how or why but anything remotely dealing with Benny was causing him to feel-To just feel! Strongly and annoyingly.

            “I'll be back.” He called out and practically ran out the door and right into a person. He hoped Inias wasn't waiting for him outside. He was sure he wouldn't have very kind words to say to him at the moment. That was a definite break in their trust. Sure, Inias had never seen Castiel but the moment he found out that he was his cousin, he should have stopped talking. Instead, it seemed like they were having a wonderful conversation. He should forgive the boy but that blatant show of affection was uncalled for. Especially, when he knew Castiel was his cousin. Especially in front of Benny.

             However, the body he slammed into was small and soft. He reached out and grabbed the woman's arms to stabilize her. It was the woman from the other day. The one that kissed Benny's cheek. She was probably hoping to share Benny's break with him. Balthazar would have to go back in and allow him his break now. Even though a selfish part of him wanted to deny him it.

             “I'm terribly sorry.” He told her letting go of her arms. Wouldn't want her or her boyfriend to get the wrong impression.

             “Wow, you must be Balthazar.” She smiled wide and looked at him in awe.“That accent is amazing.”

             His accent wasn't anything really. Benny's accent was the one that was amazing. That thick southern accent and the way he just spoke. She really should appreciate that man's voice. Then again, she seemed to have her own little hint of a southern accent as well. Maybe they moved here from the same place. Maybe they lived together and were very happy together.

             “You're Benny's, uh.”

             “Niece.” What? Balthazar had to take a step back.

             “Niece?”

             “Niece.”

             “I'm sorry.” That can't be right. There is no way that is right. Benny looks at the most thirty and she looked like she was in her twenties. “How old is your uncle?”

             “He's 35.” She told him with a shrug. “Why?”

             “Oh, that makes sense.” So, he was older. Not that much older but for some reason it made the difference in Balthazar's mind. Maybe an older brother or sister was her parent.“He looks good for his age.”

             “You're the first to say that.” There is no way he was the first to say that. Benny looked very nice indeed and he did seem a few years younger. Sure, he talked like he was way older than Balthazar, as if he had seen it all, but he had that youthful twinkle in his eyes. “Well, other than Andrea but... Anyway, I think he looks his age just fine.”

             “Well, perhaps, it's all a matter of who's looking.” Balthazar couldn't help but wonder who Andrea was. Was she his girlfriend or another aunt? He didn't want to jump to conclusions like last time.

             “I guess.” She responded with a thoughtful nod. “What are you then? 53?”

             “I beg your pardon I am only 45.” Balthazar put his hand on his heart and stared at her in disbelief. He did not look like he was eight years older than he really was. Sure, his skin wasn't the most youthful looking thing in the world but he definitely didn't look over his age. Inias thought he was younger.

             “Oops.”

             “And you are 12, I take it?” He sassed as he touched his face. His skin wasn't that bad. The woman shook her head. Instead of looking offended, the young woman grinned widely.

             “I like you.” She said with a playful tone. “You're funny.”

            “Well, I have to have something going for me.” Especially, since he looked so old. Really. His hair isn't even graying yet. He may have a few wrinkles.

             “I'm Elizabeth.” She told him and he just nodded in acknowledgment. She walked towards the door and he decided that was his time to leave. But the girl did not move, she just stood in front of the door and turned to him.“Well, walk me in.”

             “Excuse me.” Balthazar had places to be. He had no idea where those places were exactly but they certainly weren't inside the bookstore in anyway. He didn't want to go back after insisting to come out. Who did this girl think she was? “You're name may be the same as the queen's but you are not the queen. Walk yourself.”

             “Come on.” She giggled and grabbed his arm. Balthazar felt a little worried. More for himself than anything else. He had no idea why this woman insisted on taking him back in.

             “You're back! That was quick.” Benny said immediately when he entered the bookstore. He hadn't even gotten to the cafe yet. Was he waiting for him to return? Probably because Castiel isn't the best conversationalist. “I see you got friendly with my niece. Do I need to lay down the rules?”

             “Please, she's like fourteen.” Balthazar joked earning him a sigh and rolled eyes from Elizabeth.

             “I'm 24.”

             “Good for you.” He patted her on the head with a smile. “Besides, I'm gay.”

             “I knew you were way too sassy to be straight.” Elizabeth laughed.

              “Wait, there is a level of sass needed to be gay?” Balthazar was never informed that there was some sort of sass requirement.

            “Shut up.” She told him smacking him rather hard on the shoulder. Balthazar clutched his shoulder. It really stung.

             “We just met and you are smacking me?” He couldn't believe it. What did he do to deserve that kind of treatment?

             “She's just showing some love.” Benny chuckled with a small wink. Balthazar knew it was meant to be playful but he began to blush nonetheless. Looking down, he rubbed his shoulder a bit more.

              “I'd like her to show less.”

              “What can I get you, sweet heart?” Benny turned his attentions to his niece as Balthazar went behind the counter. Might as well get back to work. He was already doing such a horrible job at running the place since he hired Benny. That made him kind of a problem. But he couldn't just fire the guy. It wasn't his fault he was so irresistible.

              “Um! Strawberry and cream frappuccino.” He heard Elizabeth say excitedly. Balthazar could hear Benny chuckle again. Oh, how he loved that chuckle.

              “I only help bring out the food and tend tables.” He informed her. He really didn't do much at all when it came to orders. Balthazar really should get him trained. Castiel wasn't going to do it and it was going to be torture trying to do it himself. “You got to ask Castiel for that one.”

              Balthazar looked around for Castiel. Where was he anyway? He wasn't behind the counter like he usually was. It wasn't a problem since everything had slowed down but it was worrying. He walked into the kitchen and he found a very sorry looking lump sitting on a milk crate. He was nibbling on a cookie and seeming to be in his own world of misery.

             Apparently, Benny convinced him to eat. How the man did such a thing, he would never know. Though he does admire som- No. None of that. Right now what was important was his baby cousin, who was simply breaking his heart at the moment. He told Castiel to handle the customer. Cousin or not a job was a job. He seriously was going to kick Dean's butt for this.

             “I'm sure he'll be fine, Balth.” Benny made him almost jump out of his skin. He didn't even hear him come in.“He's a grown man. He can handle someone going on vacation.”

             “I suppose.” Balthazar sighed. His cousin looked like the life had been sucked out of him. He'd do anything to help him out but unfortunately nothing short of taking a plane to Kansas was going to help. So, he decided he could only focus on his job. There was inventory to take for one and he had to check on the book sales and if they need to order more of a certain copy.

             He pinched the bridge of his nose. His job was much harder than people thought. He did have a business to run. It wasn't very pretty. Sighing, he noticed Benny hadn't left. In fact, he just stood there awkwardly. Dread went through Balthazar's body. He couldn't possibly wish to talk about what Inias did earlier. What should he say? Well, maybe the truth. No, he might think little of him. Would he think little of him?

             “So, you're gay?” That's what he wanted to talk about? That was a bit anti-climatic. Balthazar clearly said he was and he didn't think Benny was too thick to understand what was plainly explained to him.

             “Gay isn't exactly what I should label myself. It's just easier to say without having to explain. I don't exactly say no to women all the time.” Balthazar paused. Benny was from the south. Don't Americans have a stereotype of southerners? “Don't tell me you are one of those bible thumping southerners.”

             “No, I just. I just thought you were just being British.” Benny stammered a bit in nervousness. Just being British? What was that supposed to mean?

             “Ha. Ha.” Balthazar said with a completely dead panned look. Was this man seriously saying that he thought all British people acted gay. What did acting gay entail? Suddenly, Benny flushed bright red. That was an interesting turn of events.

             “No, I'm serious.” He paused and looked down embarrassed. Balthazar lifted an eyebrow. He no longer felt nervous around Benny. Not when he was acting like this. All flustered and nervous. It was adorable. It made him want to tease him.“I just thought- Look, I don't care what you are. That's your business and there's nothing wrong with that.”

             “Well, I'm pleased you approve of my being.” Balthazar found himself responding dryly. It was mostly to get a reaction but it was, also, expressing some truth. Benny was hot. He really was but he didn't need people's approval. It was nice that he didn't care but if he really didn't care, he wouldn't have found the need to talk about it in the back of a kitchen.

             “I didn't mean it like that.” Benny looked down ashamed. At least, it resembled shame. “I just didn't want you thinking we can't get along because you're-”

             “A rainbow fairy?” Balthazar gave Benny a very serious look but the southerner looked shocked. It was like he didn't think he would call himself that.

              “What?” Benny's eyes were wide and confused. Balthazar smiled a little. He liked surprising him. He, also, liked seeing the adorable array of emotions going through his face.

              “Go on.”

             “And, you know, I'm a southerner.” Oh. He was more worried that Balthazar wouldn't be comfortable working with him. Why would he get that idea? He was the one that hired him. He, also, was the one who was always nervous around him and ran away a lot. _Ah. He thinks I'm afraid._ Balthazar thought. Nothing was further from the truth. 

             “I guess we all have our stereotypes.” He told him with a smile. Benny seemed to sigh a little relieved he wasn't being teased anymore. Of course, he probably hadn't realized Balthazar was teasing. He was a pretty good actor after all. “Seriously, being British seems gay to you people?”

             “They do seem a little gay with all those flowery tea cups and that sass.” Benny chuckled seeming much more relaxed.

              “Why is sass gay? Sass is just-”

              “So, you admit the flowery tea cups are a bit much.” Now Benny was teasing. Balthazar couldn't hide his smile but shook his head.

               “They aren't all flowery.” He informed him. Some just use mugs. You don't necessarily need a tea cup to have tea. Even then, they come with different designs. Balthazar shook his head again and walked into his office.

              “Yours are.” Benny entered the office and moved in close. Balthazar could smell his after shave. It was divine. “I bet.”

              “Out of my office, you.” Was he doing this on purpose? Was he deliberately trying to seduce him? Because it was working. Benny chuckled and moved back.

               “I was right?”

               “Get out.” Balthazar pushed him out the door and glared at him. “They were a gift from my mother!”

               “You know what?” Benny was laughing wholeheartedly now. His real laugh was something else and it seemed like his eyes twinkled more. Balthazar could still smell his aftershave. It was like some lingered on him just to torture him. “You're alright. It's nice not to see you so nervous.”

             Then Benny smiled that ridiculous, incredibly perfect smile and Balthazar couldn't contain himself. He wanted to just jump on the man and kiss that smile off his face. He wanted to tease him and make him beg. He wanted to see all the emotions that man could make with that beautiful face. He was horrified by his thoughts. He thought after their awkward conversation these thoughts were a thing of the past. Quickly, he moved back into the office and shut the door. He could hear Benny sigh outside the door.

              “I spoke too soon.”

 

 

 

 


	4. Rule Number Three: Don't Involve Friends

Balthazar was an idiot. He knew he was. He had banged his head enough times on his desk to truly become one. He spent all night fretting about everything that happened the day before: Inias, Benny thinking he was frightened of him and Benny's playfulness. He ruined a perfect opportunity. He was getting close to Benny. Getting really friendly. Why did he run off? Well, besides his x-rated thoughts but why did he freak out about it?

He could do this. All he had to do was put on his best face, get his charm out and woo that southern delight. No, he was an employee. What if things got weird? What if he was as clingy as Inias? But he wanted him so bad and it was driving him insane. Benny doesn't seem like the type to be clingy. It would be just fine. It would be more than fine if he was successful. Balthazar could hardly wait.

Balthazar may have spent longer than he needed to getting ready but he had to look his best. He'd make Benny come to him, somehow. He shook his head. He's been able to do it before. There shouldn't be any doubt on his mind, Benny would be interested. Unless he was straight. Balthazar gave himself a look over in the mirror and sighed. Won't know until he tries and even if he was straight, Balthazar was sure he could still charm the pants off of him. If it didn't work out and he isn't a curious straight guy, it was still worth a shot as long as things didn't get weird after wards.

When he entered the cafe, he swore he was in another place. It looked like the right place, it even smelled like the right place, but something was different. There was some sort of heaviness in the air like some dark cloud had come over the place. When his eyes found Castiel cleaning a spot on the counter, he realized what was going on.

Castiel looked downright miserable and Balthazar was sure he knew why. He must have realized Dean wasn't around at the moment. It was a good thing that he knew that Dean was off somewhere else. However, it wasn't a good thing that he just became some shadow of himself. Was he even here? He seemed to be wiping the same part of the counter obsessively.

This wouldn't do. If he was going to seduce Benny, he couldn't be sucked into the depressing atmosphere Castiel was emitting. He, also, had to gain Benny's attentions which seem solely stuck on Castiel with a worried look. Clearing his throat, he tried to move his gaze towards him. Castiel was going to sulk but there is no way they could just produce Dean out of thin air.  _ Time to grow up, Castiel. Life is hard. _

Benny looked over but didn't seem to look different from any other time he looked at him. Balthazar was a little annoyed. He had worked so hard on this outfit, it should do something. He wasn't going to admit defeat just yet. He just needed to go and talk to Benny, get close to him. Somehow get him to look his way. Yep. Any moment now, he was going to march over there and put his charm on full effect. Soon. Maybe.

Balthazar found himself frozen as he smiled at Benny. What the hell was he doing? This was a man like any other man. He could do this. This was his specialty. So what if Benny's smile made him feel like he should just melt there and admit defeat. He just needed to get over there and not think about Benny's smile. It was hard not to think of the man's smile when he was smiling. Why did he have to smile that way?

It took some time for Balthazar to realize that Benny was moving towards him. Balthazar's mind went on panic mode. What was he supposed to say? Before he had arrived, he had it all figured out. He knew exactly what words to say and how to say them. He knew exactly what moves to do but now, his mind was blank. Well, not completely blank. He had thoughts in his head that would make porn stars blush. That probably wasn't the best thoughts to have. It isn't like he could just tell Benny his sexual fantasies and they would just hop into bed like that. Men were delicate even if they said they weren't. He had to approach this gently. However, there wasn't a gentle thought in his mind.

_ I wouldn't mind if you tied me to the bed and rode me like the cowboy you are. _ Where the hell did that come from? What the hell? Cowboy? Why did he even think that? Balthazar shook his head trying to rid himself of those ridiculous thoughts. He had to act normal.

“Hey, Balth.” Benny greeted with a small smile. Normal. Just be perfectly normal.

“Uh, hi.” He stammered.

“ You alright there?” Great. Now Benny looked concerned.  _ Way to act normal, Balthazar. You were just brilliant at it. _

“I'm fine.” He lied trying to compose himself and behave as unaffected as possible. He could do this, he was a wonderful actor. “How- How are things going so far? You think you can handle this job?”

“Yeah, I think I'm good.” Benny nodded as he looked around the cafe. He had just finished bringing down the chairs from the tables and wiping down everything before anyone arrived. “Well, I don't know much about making coffee still.”

“Oh.” Why hadn't he shown his new employee how to make coffee and other drinks? What was the use of an employee that was just a glorified busboy. He needed to get him started on that right away or it would become very apparent that he hired Benny for his sex appeal. He couldn't have that. He turned to look over at his cousin still cleaning that one spot on the counter. “I'm sure Cassie can help you with that.”

That part of the counter was probably going to be the cleanest thing in this entire cafe. Balthazar would probably be able to see his face clearly in it like it was a mirror with the way Castiel kept cleaning it. Benny looked over at Castiel and sighed. He shook his head clearly pitying him.

“Castiel looks right awful.”

“Love is a battlefield.” Balthazar didn't even think when he mentioned that. It did sound a bit cold but such is life. He really didn't have time to worry about Castiel's love problems until Dean came back. Then he would deal with it accordingly. Until then, there was a job Castiel had to do and he wasn't actually doing it at all.

“Did you just say a title of a Pat Benatar song?” When Benny asked him that, Balthazar realized what he had said. He hadn't even been thinking about that at all. “Weird.”

“Who's weirder? The one who references the song or the one who knows the title of the song and the artist?” Balthazar questioned easily as if he hadn't been a puddle of nerves before. Benny chuckled at this and shook his head. For once, he had done something right. Now he just needed to keep this momentum, get into a pleasant and in no way awkward conversation, and begin easing Benny into a flirtatious conversation.

“Poor guy.” Benny said turning towards Castiel. Castiel didn't even have to do anything to ruin Balthazar's plans. That was an envious amount of skill. It was like his gloominess just sucked in people like a depressed black hole. He was sucking away the mood. How was he expected to woo in these conditions?

“You look pathetic.” He told Castiel as he walked by him to man the cash register. It didn't hold much sympathy since his plans were practically ruined by Castiel's pity party. He did not RSVP to this. Someone had to make sure these orders were taken and obviously, Castiel was in no shape to do such. After the first couple of orders and seeing Castiel was refusing to move an inch, Balthazar decided it wouldn't be much of a difference if his cousin didn't finish his shift today. He cared about him, he really did, but he had a business to run.

“Balthazar, I finished cleaning dishes. Is there anything else you need?” Benny's voice. No matter how many times he heard it, it never stopped giving him this little quiver up his spine. A tingly sensation that seemed to go through his whole body. Balthazar knew this couldn't be normal but he didn't care. It was a delightful sensation.

“Um, well.” Balthazar stammered. “Cassie's going to go home.”

“I am?” Castiel had the audacity to look surprised.

“Yes, I can't stand your moping around. You are ruining the mood.” Castiel tilted his head to one side trying to figure out what mood Balthazar was speaking of. “Go home. Benny's more than enough.”

“I'm not good at making fancy drinks or anything.”

“Don't worry. I'll teach you.” Balthazar wasn't really sure if he could handle teaching Benny but he figured it would be his chance to set the right kind of mood again. Maybe without the black hole of depression hanging around, he'd be able to figure Benny's type and hopefully, Balthazar would fit the bill.

Castiel was sent back to gather his stuff. He moved slowly and had this look of a lost child. Balthazar never really noticed how much his cousin had come to rely on Dean. That was until he became some mindless zombie wandering around without a purpose. He went towards the back to see if Castiel had got everything when he noticed Benny leaning against the wall looking down at his phone a little distressed.

“Is there something wrong?” Balthazar asked and almost immediately the man straightened up. The phone was put back into his pocket as if he did not wish Balthazar to know whatever he was viewing. That was certainly suspicious. “Elizabeth?”

“No, it's-” Benny hesitated as if he was going to say something that he shouldn't, which just made Balthazar want to know what it was even more. “It's nothing.”

“If you don't mind, it doesn't seem like it is nothing.” Balthazar knew he was teasing the line between professional and nonprofessional involvement with that sentence. He should just let it be. Another person's problem wasn't his. He was the man who didn't do complication and yet he couldn't stop himself from saying “Is there something you need to take care of?”

“No, it's just-” Benny certainly looked conflicted for some reason. “Her names Andrea. We're broken up but she-”

“Hasn't figured it out yet.”

“No, she knows.”

“You still love her.” It hurt more than Balthazar thought it would. He thought he was just lusting for Benny but the southern gentleman had made him actually feel something for the man. No, there must be a mistake. He did not just feel a twinge in his heart. So, what if Benny was straight? He had his suspicions before. He could handle it.

“I love what she use to be.” Benny answered smiling sadly. It was from that smile that Balthazar knew he was doomed. Benny could be bisexual. He could. Balthazar isn't someone who would toss out that possibility but he was obviously still hung up on that woman. And really, what was the chances that a rough looking man like him, from the deep south and still stuck on a his ex-girlfriend would even look Balthazar's way?

“I see.” Balthazar nodded in understanding. He needed to distance himself before this got out of control. He could feel something gnawing at his stomach as he watched Benny touch his pocket briefly. It was a foreign feeling that he did not often get. He didn't like it at all. “Well, you want to see how to make a cappuccino?”

“Oh, yeah.” Benny moved forward towards Balthazar and tried to smile. It just didn't reach his eyes though. Balthazar wouldn't have known otherwise because he was too busy avoiding eye contact and wondering what type of woman Andrea was. “Sorry, for telling you something so personal.”

“It's alright.” It wasn't. It wasn't in the least. “I'm not a heartless boss.”

“Never thought you were.”

Balthazar led Benny behind the counter and handed him a mug. He decided he would start with a cappuccino because coffee seemed simple enough. Sure, they used beans but it was pretty simple and he wanted to see if Benny could even attempt something like a cappuccino, which in all regards was pretty easy as well. Besides, he had to make coffee to make the cappuccino anyway. Well, espresso but the espresso machine made the process really easy. It would help Benny learn how to make two drinks, though, and he would have to learn how to grind the beans. It would be like killing two birds with one stone. It would really speed things up. Well, that's what he thought until Benny attempted to make the espresso. Balthazar was amazed how much someone could mess up just with making espresso. The machine made it really simple or at least he thought it did. Benny wasn’t any better with the steamed milk. He was impatient and didn’t seem to understand how much was too much or how he shouldn’t go too fast or the two would mix. He was lucky he was cute because what Balthazar saw in his cup was something he didn't want to even sip once. 

He could see Castiel leaving as he told Benny to try again. This time he walked him through each step hoping that he would get the idea. It was difficult because the man stood so close as he explained things. He could smell him so clearly and feel the heat off his body. It made Balthazar have a hard time remembering all the steps but somehow he explained it. He couldn’t really remember how he explained it and could only focus on how Benny pressed his lips when he was concentrating. No, he had to resist. Benny was definitely someone that would bring too much complication even if he was bisexual. It was better to focus on other things like Castiel.

Castiel was already heading towards the door. A day off would do him well, he supposed. He hoped that Castiel would be better soon because the cafe couldn't afford being run without one of their employees. Castiel bumped into Sam at the door. The two began speaking and he rolled his eyes. The way Castiel plainly said Balthazar didn't “Require” his “Services” made him sound like he was just getting rid of him for no reason.

“I can't stand the moping since your brother has left.” He clarified gaining Sam's attention. Noticing the addition of a miniature Dean beside him, he lifted an eyebrow. He had heard of Ben but he never had the pleasure of meeting him. “Where's your girlfriend?”

“Jess is working through lunch.” Sam explained as he neared the cafe. Ben trailed behind him looking around curiously. “It's got pretty busy at the hospital.”

“ So, she  _ is _ your girlfriend.” Balthazar teased with a smile. Just as he predicted, Sam blushed a deep red. Did he really think he could hide that? Balthazar was too good at knowing who was going to get with who. Most of his ships sailed quite nicely on their own. “About time. Now if your brother and my cousin could do the same.”

“What do you mean?” When Ben spoke, Balthazar's smile dropped. He almost forgot about the child in their presence. It was nothing a child should not be told. There was nothing wrong with the relationship his cousin and the boy's father would hopefully engage in. However, it wasn't something to have little ears hear when it hadn't been made official.

“Nothing, little man.”

“Here, Balth.” A cup of something was pushed in front of his face. When Balthazar realized that Benny was holding out the cup to him he immediately felt nervous. Benny still made him feel that strange fluttering feeling that he wished would just go away. He smiled softly and looked down. He didn’t even think of Sam watching him curiously. After he grabbed the cup from Benny, the man smiled wide and bit his bottom lip.“Try this one.”

He had heard him, he really did, but he couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the hope shining in the man’s eyes. He couldn’t help but be moved by that lovely smile and the way he was worrying that lip. Benny looked so innocent like that. He looked like he was perfectly ready to be ruined. No. He couldn’t have thoughts like that. Feeling a nudge on his side, he realized Benny was attempting to gain his attention.

“Oh, yes, of course.” His face was getting hot and he was sure he was noticeably blushing. He slowly brought the cup to his lips, hoping no one noticed how flustered Benny made him, and took a hesitant sip. It didn’t taste horrible and he didn’t taste any of the grounds. There had been way too many in the last cup, he might as well had been eating the drink. “This one is much better. It could sell.”

“I'll keep trying.” He was smiling brightly in that dazzling way of his again. He should be fined for such behavior. Balthazar should deduct it from his pay because it was distracting and he was pretty sure no work could be done in the presence of that smile. Benny looked down at Ben for a moment and the child gave him the most hateful glare he had ever seen on a little kid in his life. Balthazar was downright worried for his employee’s safety. The child was glaring hard like his eyes could shoot lasers and he was trying to melt Benny.

“You.” The child growled in a small, threatening tone. Hearing a familiar chuckle, Balthazar just stared at the child in shock. How could Benny just laugh at the pure hate that kid was radiating?

“ Hello there, kid.” Benny was completely unaffected. Why was he unaffected? Didn’t he see those horror movies with the child killers? Benny  looked over at Sam. There was some sort of silent conversation between the two, that Balthazar was not able to decipher, but the outcome was Benny directing Ben to the pastries. He showed the boy cakes and muffins with a kind smile and complete lack of caring for the supreme amount of glaring that boy was doing. For some reason, Ben toned down his glare and actually allowed himself to smile at the man. It took a while but that frowning face certainly began faltering fast. Balthazar watched the two interact with interest. He couldn’t believe Benny actually got the kid to calm down. Smiling faintly, he watched Benny continue to try hard to get the child to like him. 

When he turned to look back at Sam he found him largely smiling in a knowing manner. Balthazar wasn’t sure what the reasoning of that smile was but he knew it made him uncomfortable. “Stop smiling like that.”

“You like him.” Sam teased still smiling.

“ Shut up.”  Balthazar commanded in a hush tone. He didn't want Benny to know. What if he heard? The man paled a little. Looking behind him, he saw that Benny was none the wiser. He was still trying to convince Ben that he was a great guy.  “ He's straight anyway.”

“So was Dean.” When Sam had said that Balthazar couldn’t hold back the laugh that escaped his mouth. Dean? Straight? Those two words didn’t even belong in the same sentence. It didn’t even belong in the same galaxy.

“He was as straight as a rainbow slinky.” Anyone with working gaydar would know it was just a matter of time. Dean may still like women but that didn’t make him straight. Balthazar did enjoy female company now and then but it was quite obvious he wasn’t anywhere near straight.

“He has one of those.” Sam just missed the whole point.

“I know.”

“Wait, how?” That was a good question. Balthazar didn’t want to know about the contents of Dean’s bedroom but his cousin told him all about it anyway. 

“A magician never reveals their secrets.”

“Cas?”

“ You would think. But you are very wrong.” Balthazar sighed. If Sam knew the truth he’d probably have Gabriel arrested. The little creep had a key to every apartment and usually he didn’t bother anyone but Dean was on his hate list. He went into the apartment hoping to find something incriminating. He found nothing and when Balthazar heard his story, he threatened to call the authorities. Gabriel didn’t seem to mind, his father always bailed him out anyway, it’s amazing what one could do with the right amount of money, but he was still a little hurt his cousin wasn’t on his side. 

“You win this time.” He heard Ben say behind him. Turning around, he saw the child nibbling on a cookie. Balthazar sighed again. He really hoped Benny didn’t just give him that cookie for free. He would like to make a profit sometime. The rent won’t pay itself.

Sam walked over to the counter and ordered a coffee. It was different from his usual order but Balthazar supposed he was trying to make it easier for Benny. Regardless of how easy the task was, Balthazar hurried to Benny’s side and made sure he didn’t somehow get the grounds into the coffee again. Sam was appreciative but didn’t stay long. He left looking slightly worried after receiving a text.

Balthazar was alone with Benny now. It would have been ideal if he hadn’t known about that woman he was still pinning for. He didn’t know why they didn’t work out and it really wasn’t any of his buisness, but he couldn’t help but wonder. He wondered if she saw sides of Benny he could only fantasize about. She probably has had him sexually, Benny didn’t seem like a blushing virgin at all, but that wasn’t what he was thinking about. He was thinking about how Benny looked when he just woke up, if he cooked breakfast and if he had any quirky habits at home. 

These were thoughts he never thought about with any of his partners. Those type of thoughts were for actual relationships and not the casual sex he usually engaged in. Was he falling for this guy? That was impossible! He hadn’t even known him for that long and all he really knew was the persona he had for work. For all he knew, Benny was a complete asshole outside of work.

He tried ignoring him as much as he could while training him. It was hard. No, it was damn near impossible. Every word out of that man’s mouth tickled his stomach and made him feel like he would float up at any moment. Every smile made him feel faint and when they brushed against each other in passing or by “accident”, Balthazar felt a jolt go through his entire body.

He barely noticed when Sam returned with Jessica following closely behind. The two ordered from Benny but it was Balthazar that made their order. He couldn’t help but feel them watching him the entire time. He knew it was silly, but he felt like they were studying him for some reason and not in a good way. Something was up and he didn’t like it. So, when he saw Jessica near the counter and begin talking to Benny, he immediately questioned her motives.

“What are you doing?”

“Just being friendly.” Jessica told him in a very unconvincing way. “I can't be friendly?”

“You're up to something.”

“Why ever would you think that?” She said it in a way that made it completely obvious she had an ulterior motive. Balthazar’s back stiffened up immediately. It took her and Sam forever to get together, not as long as it was taking Dean and Castiel but very close, and he hadn’t thought they would be so quick to notice his favor towards Benny. Or maybe he was just that obvious about it. Balthazar paled and began to panic slightly. What if Benny knew all along and was just playing stupid?

“Friend of yours?” Benny questioned cautiously. He looked worried about what? Did he think something was wrong? Was it obvious? Was Balthazar always being obvious? He had to get a hold of himself. If Benny knew, who cared? There is no law saying he couldn’t think a guy was hot and the man should be flattered. It wasn’t like he was actually forcing himself on him and Benny didn’t seem like he wanted to move away from him. If he didn’t know, who cared about that either? Balthazar’s feelings were his own and it really didn’t matter if someone knew of it or not. There was no shame in whatever he felt even if he wasn’t sure what it was at the moment.

“Yeah, Balthazar and us go way back.” Jessica giggled and shook her head at the sight of Balthazar’s panicked expression but he was calming down quickly. “Like months and maybe even a year back.”

“Please, feel free to shut up at anytime.” Balthazar forced a smile that made the irritation behind it quite clear. Benny had someone he liked and Balthazar wasn’t going to be moving into already claimed territory. If Jessica tried to get them together, she would just make his employee uncomfortable and that was bad for business. If you want employees to be nice to customers and work efficiently, it was important to keep them motivated and in a good mood. Or at least, that’s what he thought.

“Oh, look he's shy.” Jessica teased catching Balthazar off guard. Benny looked directly at him when she mentioned it and Balthazar could feel the heat rushing to his cheeks. “So cute.”

“Okay. We're done.” Balthazar tried nudging her out of the way and she went while giggling but he stopped when he noticed the person behind her. He hadn’t expected him to come back again. He might have thought about it once or twice but he didn’t think he had enough backbone to come back again.

“Sorry, is this a bad time?” The young man asked confused.

“Inias?” Balthazar didn’t think this situation could get any worse. Well, it didn’t matter. Benny was off the market, anyway, and even if he was on the market, he should know that Balthazar only went for casual partners. There was no possessiveness allowed in his sexual friendships.

“Inias?” Jessica turned to look at the man, who was rather brave showing up here again, but seemed so meek in front of her.

“Hello.”

“Who are you?” She looked the younger man over trying to gauge who he was or maybe who he was to Balthazar. 

“Um, Inias?” He seemed like he was unsure of his own name. Balthazar didn’t know when it happened but Sam had approached the counter and was, also, evaluating the college student.

“ I'm Sam and this is Jess. We are Balthazar's friends.”

“Oh, um.” Inias shook his hand tenatively. “I'm a friend as well.”

“He has other friends.” Jessica whispered loudly. “Shocker.”

“Excuse you.” Balthazar use to have a lot of platonic friends once. He did before some drama ruined it all. He was hoping to get Inias away from them as soon as possible because he didn’t want history to repeat itself. This was the one thing he hated. He didn’t like his platonic friends knowing about his sex friends because then things get messy. It is bad when a sex friend becomes clingy and is a mutual friend with his platonic friends because then he loses friends over stupid reasons. He remembered that couple he was seeing that he had to end things with. All his previous club friends were friends with them and left him immediately when he left them. It was silly and full of drama which he hadn’t the time for. “Actually, Inias, I was going to call you later today.”

“Were you?” There was so much hope in Inias’s eyes that Balthazar was feeling like a villain for ignoring him for so long. He was a good kid but he already showed warning signs. He was getting too attached but Balthazar no longer cared. Benny was next to him. Unattainable, already claimed Benny. He had to move on, he needed somewhere to release all this frustration, and Inias was a safe place.

“Yeah, meet me later after work in the same place as always?”

“Of course!” Maybe it was the happiness in Inias’s voice or the suggestive look in Balthazar’s eyes but Jessica seemed to notice something. She narrowed her eyes suspicious of the two.

“What's going on?”

“We're just going to hang out.” It wasn’t actually a lie. Sometimes they did watch a movie or talked before having sex. They were friends with benefits. They didn’t always just meet for sex strictly but they never met without it either.

“Oh, cool.” Sam was none the wiser. He guessed it was because the poor soul was so innocent in his thinking. “Hey, can we get two sandwiches?”

“Which ones, brother?” Benny asked and walked away towards the display case. Inias sighed in relief as the two walked off ignoring Jessica’s presence completely.

“I thought you were ignoring me or something.” He admitted and he was right. Balthazar was ignoring him but that wasn’t something he could just tell him.

“Yeah, well, you thought wrong.” 

“Can I talk to you outside?” Jessica asked after she looked between them once more. Inias looked at her confused as she grabbed Balthazar’s arm. “Alone.”

Why couldn’t anything go right today? First, he wanted to get with Benny but no, Benny has someone. Then, he just wanted to just forget about his attraction but Sam and Jessica had to rub it in. Then, of course, Inias chose that time to come and since he was already there and willing, why not have him come over tonight? No, of course, it wouldn’t be that simple because Jessica wants to talk to him alone. What she wanted to talk about, he didn’t know, but he knew if you had to remove yourself from a building to speak about something, it couldn’t be good.

“What the hell are you doing leading that kid on?” Jessica asked as soon as they walked outside. Leading him on? Balthazar made sure to make it clear to all his partners where he stood on the situation. If they started feeling something for him, it wasn’t his fault.

“He knows from the beginning I don't love him and won't. No strings attached.”

“He doesn't seem to think there are no strings attached.”

“Yeah, but I really need him tonight.” Balthazar hadn’t planned on saying it like that. He was planning on saying that another person’s emotions were not his fault. That he couldn’t be blamed for the way someone feels and shouldn’t be blamed for it. It was not in his intention to make the boy become so attatched, he had done everything in his power to prevent it. Instead, he came off sounding like a desperate person willing to sleep with anyone without thinking of the consequences. In a way, it was kind of true at the moment. 

“Are you serious?” Jessica looked at him like she was seeing him for the first time. “You're a slut.”

“Thank you.” Balthazar responded dryly. He had heard it all before. Just because he didn’t settle down and focus on one person at a time, he had been labeled many things. He was used to being called whore, slut, disgusting, and basically anything else “normal” people could call him.

“I just-” Jessica knew her mistake. She knew despite how Balthazar responded, the words still hurt and she had said it without thinking.“You are going to hurt him.”

“I told him what he was getting into.”

“Just break it off with him so you can get into something more southern?” Jessica wiggled her eyebrows uncharacteristically. Rolling his eyes, Balthazar looked away from her. She wasn’t usually this teasing; he must have rubbed off on her a bit.

“Jess, he's straight.” Balthazar informed her but that didn’t change her expression at all. “Inias is clingy but he wants me.”

“And that's what you like?”

“Inias is my type.”

“No, I mean. You want someone to want you.”

“You are making me sound like I've got some bad self-esteem or something.” Balthazar was pretty sure he had healthy self-esteem. In fact, he was sure that he had a lot of healthy things about him. He most certainly didn’t get overly emotional when people came and went. He knew it was just how things went. His failures were just chances to work harder and try again. He didn’t blame others for his faults and he never denied responsibility. He was very well adjusted but Jessica couldn’t see that. Rolling her eyes, she looked at him skeptically.

“Oh, and you don't?”

“I don't.” Balthazar told her a little offended that she would think he was anything but perfectly healthy. Sex is fun. A person who plays many different video games wasn’t accused of having self esteem issues because they couldn’t choose one game. Sure, the game didn’t come with their own thoughts and feelings but that’s all sex ever was to Balthazar; a game. He wasn’t going to have sex with someone, who didn’t want him, that would be many kinds of wrong. But he did have to admit the motivation for taking Inias back to bed with him wasn’t the healthiest. “I just- I don't know why I do what I do. I'm not hurting anyone.”

“Except Inias.”

“He'll be fine.” Balthazar wondered if he said it enough if he would believe it. Inias would be heart broken if he got too close, he had seen it happen before. Some people recovered quickly but others, like his Aunt Naomi, never got over it. It wasn’t easy to tell who was strong and who wasn’t just by looking at them. It wasn’t easy even after getting to know the person but Balthazar tried to assure himself that Inias would be strong. “He's young. He'll heal. I'm sure once he graduates, he'll find someone better than me.”

“Fine.” Jessica nodded and Balthazar could see she just didn’t want to argue with him. He could appreciate that. Arguing was a waste of time, especially against people, who are least likely to change their ways. “But you should think more about other people. Including Benny.”

“Benny isn't a part of this.”

“Yes, he is.” Jessica stared at him hard before he finally faltered and sighed. Benny couldn’t be a part of this even if Balthazar fancied him. His heart was already taken by someone else.He would consider what Jessica told him because it is rational to consider everything but he doubt he would stop seeing Inias tonight. He already made plans.

When he entered the building again, he saw Inias still waiting by the counter. He was talking to Sam and looking a little irritated. Was it because he hadn’t got his order yet? It was odd because Benny did in fact know how to make a cappuccino and coffee. Unless Inias made another request contrary to what he usually got. That was probably it. He probably had too hard of a request for Benny to create and it was fortunate that he was the only one waiting. It was truly irresponsible of him to leave Benny alone in the cafe when he didn’t know how to make everything on their menu.

“Is there something you need, Inias?”

“Yes, if you could make me a cappuccino.” A cappuccino? Benny could make a cappuccino. He couldn’t make the best one in the world but he could certainly make a drinkable one. Hadn’t he asked Benny about it? Why wasn’t Benny making him a cup of it? Maybe he thought Benny couldn’t make it. 

“Benny has been practicing.” Balthazar assured him and motioned for his employee to come forth. Benny put down the dishes he was washing and walked cautiously towards the counter. Balthazar didn’t know why he was so nervous. “He can get you a cup.”

“I'd rather you make it.” Inias looked at Benny as if he had said something horrible to him while he was away. He was pretty sure Benny wouldn’t be unkind to Inias. Maybe he was just upset because he wasn’t asked about his order but it really wasn’t like Benny to slack off like that. Sam noticed the tension between the two much sooner than Balthazar and retreated back to his table where Jessica waited for him. However, Balthazar missed this as he was busy admiring Benny's nervousness. He never knew a guy could be even more attractive when he was uncomfortable. It made him want to tease him.

“Nonsense.” Balthazar waved away Inias, without even looking at him, and turned to Benny. “Benny, go ahead.”

As Benny began hesitantly preparing Inias’s drink, Inias was busy glaring a hole in his back. However, Balthazar didn’t notice, he was too busy watching Benny’s attractive backside moving as he worked. If he was more observant and wasn’t thinking about how nice it would be to hug Benny from behind, he would have realized the intensity in Inias's glare, and the emotion behind it: Jealousy.

 


	5. Rule Number Four: Don't Get Jealous

             The feather light kisses that trailed down his torso made him giggle a little as he ran his hand through the dark hair of his partner and tangled his fingers in it. This was a wonderful way to wake up. Pulling Inias up from where he knelt between his legs, Balthazar kissed the younger man slowly and lazily dragged one hand down his torso. Inias responded enthusiastically straddling him and pressing his hips against him. It was a shame he had to go to work so soon.

              Well, it would be a shame if Benny wasn’t going to be there. Just the thought of seeing that man’s smile and hearing the sound of his voice, made his skin burn with desire and the heat went straight down. Inias seemed to notice how Balthazar was affected but didn’t seem to understand the cause. Perhaps, he just assumed it was all his doing because he pressed against him even harder kissing with a strength Balthazar didn’t even know the boy had. Then, his alarm on his phone went off.

              Reluctantly, Inias rolled off him and groped near the bed to find his phone. Balthazar smiled as he heard the young man groan. It must be class or something equally boring. It didn’t matter, as long as Balthazar got to take a shower first. He was sure Inias would need one as well, he couldn’t attend class smelling like sex. Well, he could but he didn’t recommend it.

              “Balthazar.” Inias hastily pulled up his briefs as he looked around for his pants. “Can I come back later tonight?”

             “We'll see.” Balthazar was amused seeing the boy run around the room desperately seeking his clothes. He wasn’t even going to shower? He wasn’t sure how that would work out for his classmates sitting near him. Would they know what innocent Inias was into before class? He was sure they’d be able to smell it all over him.

             “Don't wait too long to call me.”  Leaning close to Balthazar, Inias looked like he was waiting for a kiss but never received one. Balthazar was far too busy getting up from the bed. Smiling softly, Inias just nodded a bit trying to pretend he hadn’t leaned in for a show of affection. “I almost thought you were leaving me.”

              “I can't leave you, Inias.” Balthazar responded heading towards the door to the bathroom. He didn’t even bother putting on anything since he was just going to take it off again. “We aren't together. This is just sex remember?”

              “Right.” Inias nodded a little but he didn’t look convinced. There was something similar to hurt that flashed through his eyes making Balthazar sigh. He had to end this. As soon as it flashed through though the young man forced a smile. “I don't mind. I like that about you.You’ve always been so strong. It’s admirable.”

             “Yeah.” Balthazar knew Inias wasn’t being truthful. The boy was a terrible liar. Sighing again, he tried to pretend he didn’t notice. He didn’t want him to know that he knew about the boy’s feelings. It was best to break it off without acknowledging it. Maybe today would be the last day. He couldn’t use Inias as a crutch. It wasn’t fair to him. He smiled and playfully threw the young man his shirt.“Get to class, kid.”

             “Of course, daddy.” Inias teased as he pulled the shirt over his head.

              “If I had a child like you, I'd worry.”

              “If I had a father like you, I'd worry too.” There was a hint in his voice that suggested it was Balthazar who should worry more as the young man winked. He could believe it. Inias may be perfect at acting innocent and may be soft spoken but he knew the kid long enough to know how completely naughty the child could be. Perhaps, role play was in order? That be a nice finale to their arrangement. He tried of thinking of scenarios Inias could play out while calling him daddy but the voice he imagined wasn’t right. It was much deeper and southern. Balthazar shook his head. No, he couldn’t invade his fantasies like that. He was not invited!

             So, he was a little late. So, he took longer than he thought he would in the shower. It wasn’t his fault. Who told Benny he could invade his mind while he was showering? Balthazar was not one for cold showers but he handled his problem regardless. So, in the end, he was pretty late heading towards the cafe. Ruby had a key to the bookstore and she was sure to be there. She was always so wide eyed in the morning for reasons he couldn’t say. Benny, of course, knew how to make muffins at least. He was sure the man was already busy in the kitchen. Well, until he entered the store.

             Ruby was there as expected doing nothing but texting someone on her phone. She hadn’t even realized he walked in. There was a bell on the door for a reason! He supposed she would hear it if she ever took those ear buds out. He knocked on the counter and saw her straighten up immediately. It was then that he noticed the cafe.

             It was untouched, the chairs were still on the tables and none of the food was on display. No one was there. Balthazar checked his watch against the clock. No, he didn’t have the wrong time. Why hadn’t anyone set up for the morning? He sniffed the air and couldn’t smell any muffins baking.

             “Where's Benny?” He asked turning towards Ruby. The blonde ceased filing her nails and looked up at him a little confused.

             “Who?”

             “Sorry for being late, Balth.” Benny pushed through the door completely out of breath.“I got held up.”

             Benny looked like he just ran a marathon. Did he run all the way there? That would be some amazing stamina if he did and Balthazar could admire a man with that much endurance. He loved how flushed the man’s cheeks were and how the redness spread down his neck, right to his white collar with a red smudge. Balthazar felt that strange sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach but tried his best to ignore it.

             “Nice lipstick.” He said unable to stop himself. It wasn’t casual at all, even Ruby looked up interested. It was terribly hard to get that girl interested in anything.

             “This.” Benny looked down at his collar and tried rubbing it out. It only made it more apparent. Seriously, the man should just use a tide pen or one of those detergent wipes. “I just-”

             “I see you got back together? Or moved on? Not my business really but congratulations.” Balthazar had no idea how to stop himself. He felt like he was just talking to talk. He couldn’t think straight anymore and found himself bothering about it when he should just brush it off. This wasn’t good. He had to get out of there. He was this man’s boss and should behave like one.“I just want you to know that your personal life shouldn't get in the way of your job. You leave your issues at the door. Understand?”

             “She and I aren't-” Benny stopped talking the moment Balthazar gave him a pointed look. He didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to know anything about her and Benny and he simply didn’t know why. Benny sighed and nodded. “I understand.”

             “I have some muffins to make, if you don’t mind.” He couldn’t stop himself from being irritated. He couldn’t stop himself from feeling horrible because of lipstick. Why did he feel this way? This wasn’t like him. He had his suspicions before but now he was starting to realize; he was jealous.

             Balthazar never got jealous because he never got attached. He hadn’t even gotten Benny into his bed and he was already attached. What was wrong with him? Was he going through male menopause? No, he wasn’t that old. What if it was early though? Did he need to consult a doctor?

              The important thing was to focus on the task at hand. He needed to forget about Benny for the moment and just focus on making muffins. It was hard to forget Benny, maybe he shouldn’t have ever hired him. Maybe he should fire him. No, it wasn’t Benny’s fault that Balthazar was attached, the man only came for the job. He had to deal with this professionally. He should just schedule Benny times he didn’t work. Charlie had been asking for more hours. Maybe he could give her some of his shifts and pay more attention to managing the bookstore and not just the cafe.

             “Balth, I promise I'll make sure to come on time next time.” Benny sounded like he was pleading but Balthazar didn’t want to turn around and look at him. He had muffins to make and barely any time to complete them.

              “Yes, you'll see to it, I'm sure.” Balthazar poured the mix into his muffin pans and set them gently into the oven. He could hear Benny sigh behind him. Balthazar was acting so childish and he knew it. Why didn’t he just turn around and look at the man instead of brushing him off like this? Jealousy, why did he have to even feel that at all? He didn’t own Benny and he shouldn’t care who he went with. He had to be professional. Benny cleared his throat.

             “I've been meaning to ask you but uh, -”

               “Excuse me?” A voice called from the counter. Balthazar twisted around to see Inias was waiting by the counter. What was he doing here again? He really needed to get him to stop coming around, this was not part of their arrangement.

               “Oh dear.” No one was asking if Inias needed anything. Shouldn’t there be another person working today? “Where is Cassie?”

               “You told him not to come in remember?” Benny reminded him sounding a little annoyed. Balthazar looked over at him quizzically but Benny just mirrored his expression. The muffins were in the oven, the timer would go off when they were ready. He could deal with Inias during that time. As he approached the counter, he saw that Benny had already taken down the chairs and set the tables. However, there was a severe lack of food in their display case. Sighing, he turned to their first customer.

              “Hey, Inias.” He didn’t know why Inias had to come so early when they had just saw each other a short while ago. He wondered if the boy even made it to class or did he decide to just skip.

              “Hey, cappuccino please.” Inias spoke as if he was doing nothing wrong showing up at the cafe again. Balthazar nodded and Benny went to make the young man’s drink. Inias’s eyes widened and he shook his head. “Not you. I want Balthazar to make it.”

             “Alright, brother.” Benny didn’t seem to care. Probably, because there was still so much setting up to do. However, there were the muffins still baking and Balthazar had to figure out what he could fill the display case with in the meantime.

              “Benny has gotten much better.” He assured Inias. “It tastes great just like I would make it.”

              “I don't want him dealing with my drinks.” Inias was blunt and there was a hint of irritation in his voice. Benny picked up on it and straightened up right a way. The look in the southern’s eyes was downright intimidating and so sexy.

              “You have a problem with me, brother?” Benny looked down at Inias as if he could shrink the man with just his stare. Inias didn’t back down. Instead, he puffed up his chest in a manner Balthazar had never seen before and glared back at the older gentleman.

             “I'm not your brother.”

             “Oh, well, I would've never knew that unless you told me.” Benny sassed with a fake look of surprise. “We look so god damn the same, you and I.”

            “Benny, please.” Balthazar didn’t know what their problem was but he could not have them putting on a show in his cafe. He was not going to stand here and have them scare off customers with their bickering. If need be, they could handle their petty fight after hours; Balthazar would even provide them a ruler if they want to compare sizes. Those children. “I believe the table over there may need to be clean.”

            “Oh, I'll make it spic and span.” Benny roughly grabbed a washcloth from the sanitizer bucket and squeezed it hard while staring straight into Inias’s eyes. Balthazar couldn’t help but watch as the muscles moved under his skin as he strangled the wash cloth; it was glorious. He couldn’t help but feel a little light headed by the dangerous look in Benny’s eyes. He never knew the man was capable of such a powerful and swoon worthy look.

             Inias seemed annoyed by the very presence of Benny. As Balthazar made his drink and Benny made sure to really scrub the tables, Inias took his time glaring a hole in Benny’s back. He jumped when Balthazar held out his drink towards him and blushed.

            “Thank you, Balthazar.” He placed his hand over Balthazar’s on the cup and leaned in close. Before Balthazar could make any noise of protest, Inias pressed his lips against his. Balthazar was shocked by how forward Inias had become and couldn’t help but notice the boy’s eyes wide opened staring off in another direction. If he wasn’t mistaken, Benny was currently in that direction. Benny.

               Balthazar pulled away quickly and looked at Inias like he had never seen the man before in his life. This wasn’t the Inias he had gotten to know; something was definitely different. Looking over, he noticed Benny looking over at the two of them with an unreadable expression. Balthazar really hoped Inias wasn’t trying to complicate things further. It was bad enough Balthazar was crushing on a most possibly straight man but if Inias was going to start something unnecessary, this was about to get worse.

               “Inias, thin ice.” Balthazar warned with a stern look.

               “It was worth it.” Inias smiled proudly and grabbed his drink with a wink.“Have a great day.”

                Balthazar couldn’t believe what had happened. He was really considering giving Inias a chance to redeem himself before this. He had really thought of not tossing him aside just because of his pesky affections but now? Now, he had no choice but to get rid of him; he was getting too involved and he was sure Inias would soon cause a scene. He did so hate scenes.

                He had to think of the best way to break it to the boy. Obviously, Inias had feelings for him and they were much deeper than he thought; they must be seeing that he felt threatened by his employee. He never knew a partner to get jealous of him just socializing with another man except the ones that tried tying him to a relationship. Break ups with those sorts were messy and exhausting; he was not looking forward to it.

               He should have ended it when Jessica told him to. Perhaps, it would have been much simpler that way. Instead, he allowed his feelings for Benny cloud his judgement and he had used Inias as a crutch. He did this to himself and he had to find a way to get out of it.

              “Boyfriend?” Benny questioned when he walked behind the counter.

              “No, just a friend.” Balthazar informed him with a sigh. It really didn’t matter what Inias was to him as Benny was a mere employee and nothing else. But part of him really wanted Benny to know he was still single; a ridiculously hopeful and idiotic part of him.“What does it matter? Personal life stops at those doors remember?”

              “Right.” Benny didn’t look convinced but he didn’t press the issue further. “Anything else needing some cleaning?”

             “No, everything looks fine.”

             “Balth, are you mad at me?” It took a moment to understand what Benny was asking him since Balthazar found himself unprepared. He was too busy thinking about ways to let Inias down gently.

             “No. Not particularly.”

             “Oh, just checking.” Benny shifted uncomfortably in front of him. “If I do anything wrong, you'd tell me, right?”

             “Of course, it would be unprofessional not to.” Balthazar really tried to sound like he wasn’t preoccupied with other thoughts or the stain of that red lipstick on Benny’s otherwise white shirt didn’t still make his heart sink to his stomach. Thankfully, the oven dinged at the right time. “If you don’t mind.”

              Working with Benny was tense that day. Benny didn’t even attempt to make conversation with him like he normally did but even if he had tried, Balthazar would probably not be interested in responding. However, he knew perfectly well why he was a bit quiet and uninterested and would be completely understanding if Benny was walking on eggshells around him; he could get quite frightening when he is giving someone the cold shoulder, but he didn’t understand why it felt like Benny was ignoring him back,

             Balthazar didn’t have time to worry about it since he had bigger things to think about. He thought he could just ignore Inias but he knew the boy would show up at his cafe no matter what. Inias use to be so innocent and obedient; what had changed? There were too many problems and he didn’t like that. Therefore, the best mode of action was to treat each problem immediately. First, he would deal with his silly feelings for one southern gentleman.

            He called Charlie and informed her of some shift changes and extra hours she would accumulate. Charlie seemed relatively happy about getting more hours and didn’t ask about the shift changes. Balthazar liked it when people were easy to deal with like that. He just wished everyone was liked that then he wouldn’t have to worry about so many things.

            The next day, he went to work earlier than usual. He hadn’t called Inias at all but knew he couldn’t just pretend there wasn’t a problem. Inias would surely come for a cappuccino and possibly try to start things with Benny again. Perhaps, he should warn Benny about it. No, this was his business and no one elses. He would just have to tell Inias it was over and let that be that.

            Walking towards the counter, he noticed Castiel standing around looking rather lost but no Benny. Upon searching the back, he found the southern man was no where to be found. Castiel was busy setting up the cafe and when asked, he just shrugged.

            “Where’s Benny?” Balthazar turned to Ruby, who was drinking her third energy drink of the morning. When he had entered the building, she was still drinking the first one. She was going to kill herself with those things one day.

               “I don’t know.” She shrugged with a confused look. It was almost as if she didn’t even know who he was asking about.

             Customers were coming in when the phone rang for the third time that morning. Balthazar had heard it the second time and Castiel informed him that the phone had rung prior when he was in the back. It was strange because he would have figured someone would have answered the phone. When it rang the second time, he hurried to it but just missed it. Balthazar figured he needed a better phone that had caller ID instead of the ancient one in his office. Maybe then he would be able to call whoever back.

             When it rang the third time, Balthazar was busy handling the customers that had begun pouring in. This was a bookstore and yet so many people just came for the cafe. Balthazar couldn’t go into the back and answer the phone in the office while there was so much to do. Luckily, Ruby had a phone as well behind her counter. Why she hadn’t even attempted to answer it was beyond him.

             “Ruby, get that.” He called over with two drinks in hand. “I’m in the cafe.”

             “When are you not?” She groaned taking out her ear buds.

             “Get the phone.” Balthazar couldn’t just have her sit around and occasionally ring a person. He had been too lenient with her but really, he couldn’t afford to be rid of her. Ruby knew it and was using it to her advantage.

             “It’s for you.” She called back obviously unhappy she actually had to do some sort of semblance of work. “I think he said his name was Benny?”

             She said it like a question making Balthazar worry about her knowing the employees she worked with. It was true she was on the other side of the store but would it  kill her just to remember their names? It wasn’t like she needed to point them out in a crowd just know that there was in fact a Benny who worked here instead of staring at Balthazar confused.

              “Ruby, why must you forget the names of the other employees who work here?”

             “The cafe is so far away, Balthazar.” Ruby made a long exaggerated sigh as if just the thought of walking the few feet towards the cafe would take away all the energy she drank from her cans. “Why am I going to get to know them?”

             Rolling his eyes, Balthazar walked towards her and snatched the phone from her hand. Ruby was that teenage daughter he never wanted ever. She wasn’t even a teenager but she sure acted like one. Ruby gave him a look and smiled. When he found the girl she was being attacked in an alley by two guys. Balthazar pretended to know Ruby and asked her where she had been to stop the men from struggling with her. They were shocked to be caught and tried to act like she was coming on to them. Really, struggling and saying “no” was a come on? Was there even brains in their noggins? When those disgusting men asked if Ruby liked older men, since Balthazar was substantially older than the college student, then called her some disgusting names and insinuated some ridiculously crude ideas, Ruby told them Balthazar was her father. It was enough to frighten them away but Balthazar was angry the two were about to violate a girl if it wasn’t for her “father” showing up. Father. It was ridiculous. He didn’t look that old but it sort of solidified their awkward relationship right then and there. She did act like a kid helping her dad at work out of obligation for the family or something like that. In the end, he still couldn’t fire her even if she couldn’t remember any of the employee names or actually do her job with a pleasant attitude.

             “Hello? Yes?” Balthazar turned from Ruby with the phone in hand.

             “Sorry, I can’t come in today, Balth.” That gorgeous southern accent was tainted with rasp and a drowsy sound to it. Benny sounded like he was on his last leg.

             “Are you alright?”

            “It’s just a cold. I’ll be fine.” That didn’t sound like just a cold, it sounded much worse. Balthazar began to worry when he heard Benny begin hacking in the background. Shouldn’t he go see a doctor?

               “You don’t sound like you’ll be.” Balthazar told him. “Alright, I have Castiel here so, I should be fine. Rest up, will you?”

              “Sure thing, boss.”

             Benny was sick. He wasn’t just sick he was very very sick. Balthazar began to worry throughout his shift. He wondered if Benny had anyone that could help him. He wondered if he was drinking enough fluids or eating enough. Was he eating?

             Without knowing how, Balthazar found himself in his office searching for Benny’s employee information. He searched through out every drawer and file to find it but he finally did; Benny’s address. He knew Benny lived in the same apartment building as Castiel, so all he needed was the apartment number. He had left Castiel to work on his own at the cafe once their rush was over.

               Few minutes after leaving the cafe, he found himself at the grocery store buying ingredients. After that, he was back at home preparing some soup for his ailing employee. Chicken noodle soup was the best for colds and he was sure Benny would feel much better after a bowl. He packaged what he made in a thermos and put in some cough drops and other things for colds that he could find around the house in a bag. Once he was packed and ready to go, he stopped himself.

              “What am I doing?”Was it strange for him to make soup for an employee? Why did he even go that route? Balthazar had never made anything for anyone before. Well, that wasn’t true but for potential bed partners it was. He never wanted to get close so, he made sure to keep a certain distance. Making soup was not keeping any distance.

 

             But it was already made. He couldn’t just let it go to waste.

 

              So, he gathered everything and headed towards Benny’s apartment. He got held up by Gabriel being a complete imbecile to Dean. He dealt with him the way he dealt with any annoying idiot; kicked him in the shins repeatedly. Gabriel was a coward and had been ever since they were children; it was why he kept to the shadows and pranked people anonymously. He talked big but if you attacked him, he wouldn’t attack back and well, after a while, he would run away. Balthazar knew this man well and knew how to deliver devastating kicks to the shin. Just like that Dean began following him.

               The man teased him about giving soup to Benny and he wanted to tease him right back. Dean could say all he wanted about how Balthazar should go for it. It didn’t matter. He didn’t see Dean going for it with Castiel. His cousin was still sitting around an innocent, naive virgin and it was all Dean’s fault. Perhaps he should stare at the mirror and start back with that whole “Go for it” nonsense. Clearly, he needs to take his own advice.

               Balthazar always knew this apartment building was strange. Gabriel was running it so it was bound to be insane but the things he saw that night, he would never see in his building. The most excitement they had at his apartment building was some old lady’s dog got loose on the fourth floor and somehow rode the elevator to the second floor; people were rather upset about the whole thing. Here some teenager was pulled into an apartment by a grown woman and he didn’t even want to think about why. He wouldn’t have to because the moment Dean knocked on the door and it opened, Balthazar’s mind went completely blank.

               “Hey brother” Benny spoke apparently only seeing Dean at the moment but Balthazar didn’t mind. It gave him time to take in the delicious sight before him. Benny stood there with nothing on but a white undershirt and matching boxers. There was nothing between those two undergarments and Benny’s delicious flesh. The undershirt was tight on him showing the soft yet solid body underneath. There was definitely muscle but there was also some plumpness to him. Balthazar usually liked his partners to be soft but physically fit. He didn’t really usually have a partner with pudge as they were usually quite slender. However, he couldn’t help but want to touch the soft middle of this teddy bear.

                The boxers, however, were disappointingly loose fitting. There wasn’t much to see with the bulky cloth. Balthazar had wished Benny was more of a brief guy or boxer briefs. Something where he could see his package better; this was just like shorts.

                “How are you feeling, Benny?” He heard Dean ask but he wasn’t paying that much attention to it. His mind was more on Benny’s exposed legs. They were pretty nice for someone with a doughy middle. They were much hairier than any of his chosen partners but Balthazar found he didn’t really care. He liked everything about this man no matter what it was.

                “Like shit.” Benny responded with a slight chuckle. “And that’s putting it nicely.” Suddenly, the boxers were gone. Balthazar wouldn’t mind that if it meant they were off Benny but instead, they were just be covered by the door. Balthazar was a little sad he couldn’t see Benny’s legs anymore. At least, he still had his chest and lovely, strong arms to look at. Those arms could wrap around him any day; he didn’t even care if it was in the middle of work. “Hey, Balth. What are you doing here?”

                  It took Balthazar a moment to realize Benny had just talked to him. He was too busy imagining the shirt disappearing and wondering what he had underneath. Was his chest as hairy as his legs? Balthazar usually cringed at the thought of too much hair on a partner but he found himself just curious now. He just wanted to know what it looked like and how it grew. He wanted to know if there was muscles beneath that pudge too. He wanted to touch it so badly. Shaking himself from his thoughts, Balthazar flushed with realization. He must looked like an idiot just now.

                  “I brought you some soup.” His voice cracked like he was going through puberty again. This was getting worse and worse as it went on. Balthazar hoped Benny didn’t notice his nervousness because he was sure Dean did if he understood that knowing smile of his.

                   “You didn’t have to do that.” Benny smiled softly as he leaned on the door frame. His face was flushed from possibly the sickness but it made him looked completely wrecked. He looked the way Balthazar wanted to make him look; messed up hair, flushed face with a dazed smile. He reached out to grab Balthazar’s grocery bag but stopped himself when he realized he was still in his boxers.  “Man, brother. My boss. He’s like an angel sometimes.”

                   “Oh, I hear you.” Dean teased with this disgustingly annoying smile that Balthazar had to elbow him roughly to get rid of.  “Well, I’m sure I’m not needed here so-”

                  “Bye.” Balthazar pushed passed him and opened Benny’s door. He didn’t need Dean staying any longer and giving Benny hints that he might like him. It was probably bad to look at his form then if he didn’t want him to know. Balthazar pushed passed Benny desperately trying to look anywhere but his crotch. “I have other things for you.”

                 “Oh, well.” Benny shut the door behind him after giving Dean a look. Balthazar didn’t really know what Benny was doing looking out the door but he decided not to ask. “Let me get some pants.”

                 “You’re wearing pants.” Balthazar looked down at Benny’s boxers and the man seemed to follow his line of vision.

                “No, I’m not.”

                  “I can see them clear as day right on you.” Suddenly, realization hit him hard. He was so flustered around Benny he had forgotten how to speak properly in America. Why was he making a fool of himself over and over in front of this man? “Oh, god. I swear I’m usually good at this. I’ve been here for years for God’s sake. I don’t know what happened.”

                 “What does pants mean in Britain?” Benny was smart and that was definitely a plus.

                “Underpants.”

                “Oh, well.” Benny chuckled and looked down awkwardly. “That would be awkward if I wasn’t wearing that.”

                “It wouldn’t exactly be awkward.” Balthazar’s eyes widened in shocked by his own words. How could he let that slip? Benny looked at him strangely. Clearing his throat, Balthazar tried to cover it up. “I mean. You don’t have anything I don’t have.”

             “True.” Benny seemed to fall for that. “We’re both men here.”

             “Here.” Balthazar walked towards the round table that was half in the living room half in the kitchen area. Benny’s apartment was terribly small. “I’ll set this down on the table.”

             “And I’ll get on some…”Benny looked at Balthazar expectedly as he opened one of the two other doors in the area.

             “Trousers.” Balthazar supplemented.

             “Yes.” Benny chuckled.  “Those.”

             Balthazar felt giddy. He didn’t know why he did but he couldn’t help himself. He was in Benny’s apartment. This small, messy apartment had Benny’s scent all over it. Balthazar didn’t think he was being weird for noticing that Benny had a distinct scent that was faint on the furniture but it was still there.

             The apartment was too small for his tastes though. There wasn’t even a TV in there but he doubted one would fit with the dull looking love seat taking over the living room. There was a hallway to the front door from one side of the living room and a door that led to the bathroom. The loveseat pointed towards the small kitchen. To one side of it was the hall and the other was a large window looking out to the city. A few steps from the loveseat was a round table with two chairs. It took up most of the room of the living room and touched into the small kitchen. The walls were white and everything else was bland browns and greens but this was Benny’s home. These were his chairs and that was his… Purple scarf?

             “Oh, forget that.” Benny spoke as he exited his room fixing his suspenders. He wore suspenders.

             “Lucky you.” Balthazar brushed a hand against the scarf. It was soft and fluffy. Lifting it up to his face to study it, he noticed a distinct scent of perfume. Lady’s perfume. That feeling in his gut begin to happen again but he tried to pretend he wasn’t affected. “So, popular today.”

             “No, I wish I was less popular.”

             “Should I go?” Balthazar hadn’t realize he was intruding on anything. Was she still there? Was she in his room right now? He didn’t know how he would take it if he saw her. She was probably gorgeous. A man like Benny wouldn’t have anything less he was sure. Maybe he was just being silly coming over to give some soup. Obviously, Benny had someone who could make him all the soup he wanted.

             “No. Not you.” Benny grabbed the scarf from Balthazar’s hand and tossed it on the floor. Such disregard for the scarf made Balthazar wonder about the owner. Was it Elizabeth? No, Elizabeth didn’t wear that much perfume and he doubted Benny would just toss her scarf like that.

             “None of my business.” Balthazar was talking more to himself than Benny but he saw the man nod all the same. He opened the thermos and walked into the man’s kitchen. Thankfully, he didn’t put the plates somewhere hard to find and he actually had a bowl and a spoon. Balthazar was worried his kitchen had the same minimalist idea as the rest of the house and may lack a lot of things. “Here. Best to eat it when it is still hot.”

              He prepared the bowl and set it in front of Benny. He didn’t tell him he made it by himself. He didn’t inform him about the time he took evaluating the ingredients in the grocery store and measuring everything. He just sat in the chair opposite of him and watched as Benny scooped up some of the soup slowly.

             “Jesus!” Benny exclaimed after taking just one bite. Balthazar looked at him shocked.“Geeze, Balth, A little warning.”

              “I did tell you it was hot.” Balthazar tried to say as calm as possible but he was a little scared he messed up.  “Why didn’t you blow on it.”

            “Was it still cooking as you walked over here?” Benny chuckled and began blowing on his next bite. “Damn near burnt my tongue clear out my mouth.”

             “Don’t exaggerate.” Balthazar told him but inside he was rather worried. He didn’t want to hurt Benny and he wanted to make this right. “I’ll fetch you some water.”

            “Wait.” Benny grabbed his arm before he could leave the table completely. “This is my place.”

            “And you’re sick.” It was hard sliding Benny’s hand off his arm. It wasn’t that he was holding tightly but it was because that warm hand was on him and he didn’t want it to let go. “Let me help.”

             “Thanks.” Benny smiled softly at him with some sort of affection. Balthazar could tell it was probably just normal thankfulness and friendship but part of him hoped that Benny was, also, adding in another type of affection.“You know you don’t gotta help me or anything.”

             “I want to.” It wasn’t a lie. Balthazar found himself completely happy helping Benny. There was a feeling swelling up in his chest whenever Benny smiled and he didn’t really understand it but part of him never wanted it to go away. He tried to act casual though and not let his feelings show. “I can’t let you suffer alone.”

             “Yeah, you could.” Benny sighed and shook his head. “You’re a good man, Balth. Your friend know that?”

            “Who?”

             “That little fellow. The one that kissed you.”

             “Inias.” Balthazar didn’t understand why Benny brought up Inias. Was it because of the show he put on the other day? “He’s just a friend.”

              “He seems awfully friendly.”

             “Yes, well.” What could he say about that? Should he just tell Benny what Inias was to him? It wasn’t like he and Inias were dating and he had many other partners beside Inias. Just a few weeks ago he was seeing another man named Daniel. Inias knew Daniel and the two seemed to get along well. Most of his partners knew each other. Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t called Daniel in a while and Inias was getting too clingy. Balthazar frowned. What was he going to do with Inias?

             “Seems to trouble you.” His worry must have shown on his face because Benny looked at him concerned.

             “It’s not important.”

             “If something is bothering you, you can tell me, you know?”

             “It’s my problem and I’ll deal with it.”

              “Just tell him you don’t like him like that.” Benny supplemented almost like he knew what was going on. Balthazar was taken aback. The man had said it so sternly as if he was ready to be rid of Inias himself. It shouldn’t be surprising seeing as Inias had been nothing but unkind to Benny.

             “Trust me. He knows I have no feelings for him.”

               “Yeah. I made that clear to Andrea today.” Andrea? The scarf must have been hers if Benny saw her today. Balthazar was sure no man as sick as Benny would just take a leisurely stroll outside. “Maybe this will be the last time she comes knocking on my door.”

              “I sincerely doubt it.” He pointed out with a sigh. It was so obvious she wasn’t planning on leaving Benny alone. “She left her scarf here. Perfect excuse to come back if it was intentional.”

              “Maybe I should move.” Benny chuckled. “You know a place where a guy like me could crash at?”

              “Don’t be so juvenile.” Balthazar rolled his eyes but inside a warm feeling went through his body. Benny didn’t want to be with her. Benny may be single still. Also, Balthazar would be more than happy to have the man move with him but he knew he couldn’t suggest that. “Mail it to her address if you don’t want to see her again.”

              “Good idea. You must have some experience with this sort of thing.”

               “All my partners usually don’t cause scenes if I want to stop our arrangement.”

               “Partners? Plural? Or is this all the ones you ever had?”

                 “I don’t have boyfriends.” Balthazar took a deep breath. He had to tell him. It wasn’t like Benny wouldn’t have found out sooner or later somehow. Especially with Inias pulling such stunts like the other day. Also, if Benny wasn’t completely straight and Balthazar did have a chance, it was best for him to know where he stood when it came to relationships. “I have sex friends. We just have sex once and a while no strings attached and I do have multiple ones.”

                  “Little fellow one of those friends?” Benny didn’t seemed bothered by the new information. He didn’t seem hurt, surprised or interested. Balthazar was hoping for something to show on his face but nothing did. It was just a conversation between friends.

                “Yes.”

              “Awfully young.”

              “He seems to fancy me just fine despite my age.” Balthazar really wished people didn’t remind him of his older age so often. Sure, he wasn’t a spring chicken but that didn’t mean he wanted to hear about it all the time.

               “Well, that’s cause you’re so damn likeable.” Benny told him with a smile catching Balthazar off guard. “I mean you brought me soup and you’re helping me out and I’m just you’re employee. We aren’t even really friends or anything.  I mean you got to be treating your friends even better, huh?”

               “Not really.”

             “You’re just modest.” Benny chuckled.  “You think I’m kidding? My own niece hadn’t brought me any soup. My own niece! You’re an angel.”

              Balthazar brought that soup because he wanted to be close to Benny. He liked Benny and he knew it was more than just physical attraction. It wasn’t love. It was anything but love. Maybe there was some friendship there but whatever it was, it wasn’t love. However, if this was any other person, he probably wouldn’t have done this.

              He had broken hearts, ruined relationships and had caused his own mother to cry and call him words he hears so often now. He slept around, got drunk on a regular basis and sometimes did things other people wouldn’t even talk about. Angels wouldn’t have orgies or make their parents hate them. Angels wouldn’t be utter failures that’s last hope is a bookstore in a foreign country. Angels were loved by everyone and made miracles happen. Balthazar did do things on his own and made things happen but they were not miracles.

              “No. No, I’m not.”


	6. Rule Number Five: No Complications

           “I think this should be our last time, Inias.” It was the first thing Balthazar said that morning after washing up. He couldn’t keep this going longer than he already had. After his talk with Benny, he realized that he shouldn’t complicate matters anymore than he needed to. That meant he had to cut ties with the young man.

            Inias looked at him eyes wide with shock. Behind those eyes was a sign of hurt that Balthazar could see was much deeper than he anticipated. He should have never taken Inias’s number that night. He was a college student and a good boy, much more different from his other partners. Inias wasn’t use to this sort of life and he should have never made an arrangement with him.

            “What? Why?” Inias looked at him with those wide innocent eyes of his. He clearly didn’t understand the whole idea that this arrangement was never meant to be a permanent thing. The ending had always been there even if they never spoke about it. Everything ends and this was no exception; it was a lesson in life, really.

             “I just feel that it is best for both of us if we cease this arrangement.”

             “What did I do wrong?” He sounded like they were breaking up from years of a relationship and not merely as sex friends. “I can change.”

             “No. Don’t make a scene.” Balthazar rubbed his temples. They hadn’t been in this sort of arrangement long; it wasn’t like they had many years behind them or anything. However, Inias had become so attached to him it was insane. He knew it could only get worse if he continued and this was already becoming an issue. Balthazar could even see the boy’s eyes tearing up. This wasn’t what he expected or wanted. He hated when his ex partners got emotional or wasted time trying to argue their case. It was why he usually just didn’t call them instead of formally telling them the arrangement was over. “I know how you feel about me. I’m sorry. I don’t share your feelings and I probably never will. So, I am letting you go now, so I don’t just drag you along and give you hope. There is no hope, Inias. I don’t love you.”

            “I know you don’t but you can’t possibly say you won’t.” Inias moved towards him reaching out a little. “Everyone falls in love.”

            “I won’t.” Balthazar stepped back as if Inias was diseased. He wanted to be clear that there was no feelings on his end. Any show of sympathy would only make Inias hold on more. He knew that from previous problematic partners. “I don’t. It’s just the way things are. I’ve never been in love and never will.”

             “There is a first time for everything.”

              “Even if that is true, what makes you so sure it would be you?” It was harsh and some may say a little cruel but Balthazar really didn’t see the point in giving someone false hope. It was not his fault Inias fell in love with him; he had done nothing to gain the boy’s affections. It was not his responsibility to handle the boy merely because he fell in love with him. Just because one was throwing their affections to another didn’t mean the other was obligated to reciprocate. It was Balthazar’s right to choose who he wanted to be with and that person wasn’t Inias. So, he shouldn’t feel like the bad guy; he shouldn’t feel like it was his fault at all but he did. In a way, it was because he took that phone number from him with a smile. He used the boy to try to forget his new employee when he knew feelings were arising but that didn’t mean he was obligated to love Inias. He couldn’t just make himself love someone when he didn’t.

             “Look, I know you don’t love me and I know you may never love me but I like being around you.” Inias tried reasoning with him desperate to not be tossed away. “I like you despite you never loving me. We can be good together. I could take care of you and I don’t care that you’ll never be romantic with me. Why can’t we just have a good time?”

            “Because you aren’t here for that.” Balthazar sighed. Why couldn’t Inias see that he didn’t want to be trapped by him? They would never work out because Balthazar couldn’t be tied down by him. He would have other partners and he doesn’t want to deal with jealous drama.“I can’t give you what you want.”

             “I decide what I am here for.” Inias looked straight into his eyes with a tense expression. Gone was the pleading looks and eyes full of sadness. He had turned his sadness to anger quickly. Balthazar was amazed at the sudden shift of emotions but it only solidified that Inias would be more trouble than he was worth.“I want you no matter how you give yourself to me. If I wanted more than this I would be upset with every other partner you are with but I’m not.”

              “And Benny?” Balthazar knew that Inias wasn’t just being testy with his employee for no reason. The kiss gave the whole thing away, Inias wanted Benny to see the kiss; he was trying to prove something that Balthazar gave him no consent on at all. That was a kiss laying a claim and Balthazar was not one to be claimed.

              “That’s different.”  Inias looked down ashamed. He knew what he did and at least he wasn’t trying to argue out of that one.

               “How so?”

                “I’ve never seen you look at anyone the way you look at him.”

                 Balthazar supposed no one had ever got him as bothered as Benny has in such a long time. He couldn’t even remember the last time he felt so physically attracted to someone. He couldn’t think of anyone he was attracted to that looked a thing like Benny. Perhaps it was because he was getting old and use to his normal type of men. They were no less attractive but maybe he just needed something different. The gap between him and the beautiful youths were growing more and more each day. So, of course, that would make him more attracted to someone easier to relate to. Balthazar was certain that was all it was.

               “Well, it’s none of your business.” Despite ruling out any deep feelings, Balthazar didn’t want to explain it to Inias. He didn’t need to explain anything to him; they weren’t together. “Just-”

              “Give me a chance.” The young man cut him off with a pleading look. “Date me normally and I’ll prove I’m capable.”

              “Inias, don’t make this complicated.” Balthazar hated when things got too difficult to cut off cleanly. They already reached a point where one of them would be hurt. To prolong this would only cause deeper wounds for the youth. Didn’t he see that? Balthazar was never in this for a relationship and Inias had to move on if he was looking for anything like that because Balthazar could not provide it. “The rules were simple and now it is over.”

             “Fine.” Inias looked down sadly but he didn’t shed a tear. His eyes were watery but the young man did well to hold them back. He gathered his things slowly and sighed.  “I did love you, you know.”

             “I know.” It was the whole reason he was stopping the arrangement. Balthazar couldn’t not notice the affections the college student held for him. He watched Inias place on his back pack and felt a little sorry for the kid. “For what it’s worth, we had a lot of fond memories.”

             “For what it’s worth.” Inias chuckled humorlessly. Balthazar watched as the man shook his head and dropped his arms. As he neared the door, he turned back with a more determined look and said the words that Balthazar feared meant there would be more problems in the future. “I’m strong, Balthazar. I’ll prove it.”

               He really hoped Inias wouldn’t try to prove anything to him. He just wanted a clean break and to go back to his carefree life. Even dealing with the financial part of the bookstore wasn’t enough to stop him from thinking about what Inias could have meant. He really hoped the boy wouldn’t cause a scene in his store.

              The good news was as the cafe began to get a lot of business, so did the bookstore. Balthazar was pretty happy to see book sales were steadily growing as well. It probably meant that Ruby would actually have to work. No wonder she was even more annoyed than usual. Balthazar kept to himself in the office. The more he couldn’t be seen from the windows of the cafe the less likely Inias would show up. At least, that was what he was hoping for. Maybe Inias had shown up but since he was not present, he probably just left.

              He felt horrible. Here he was a man in his forties hiding from a college student, but he had to admit Inias sort of concerned him. He had this strange determined look that seemed to suggest he was capable of anything. Balthazar was not interested in seeing what those things were. Besides, there was so much paperwork he had been putting off that needed to be done. If anything, he actually became a competent boss.

             There was a knock on his door and he looked up to see Benny peering through his office window. He was no longer new and Balthazar was sure with Castiel, Benny could handle the cafe without him. After a week or so there comes a time when the training ends and the real work begins. If he had any questions he could ask Castiel but for some reason he had come to his office. Balthazar sighed and motioned for him to come in.

             “What’s up?”Benny asked as he entered the office.

             “Nothing.” Except a bunch of paper work, avoiding seeing Inias and possibly distancing himself from Benny to make sure he didn’t grow any more attached than he already was. Balthazar noticed the one word didn’t satisfy Benny in the least. He just stood over his desk with an expectant look. Balthazar had plenty of ideas what that look could mean but he was sure all of those fantasies weren’t actually what was going through Benny’s head. Did he have a question? If he didn’t have anything to say, why was he standing there and not doing his job? Pointing out the door, Balthazar gestured for Benny to leave. “Work.”

             “You look like you need to talk to someone.” Benny sat down a bit on top of his desk. Balthazar found himself considerably envious of that desk. He would have said something to his employee about casually sitting on his boss’s desk; it wasn’t acceptable behavior in a professional setting. However, Balthazar kept quiet. He couldn’t deny that he had dreams of pressing Benny on top of his desk and it was nice seeing the man sit himself up on it on his own.

             “My problems are my own.” He really tried his best not to look like he was thinking of standing up and pushing Benny all the way on to the desk. He tried really hard to look like a boss and not some old man drooling over his employee.

             “Come on, Balth.” Benny had to lean over the desk. He was practically laying on it now with his body twisted a bit, propped up by his elbows with his legs off the edge. Balthazar was wondering if he was doing this on purpose. Was he trying to get him upset, teasing him or was he trying to seduce him? Balthazar didn’t want to guess wrong but by the amusement in the man’s eyes, he supposed he was just playing around. “We had that heart to heart at my apartment just a few days ago.”

              “Just... I stopped my arrangement with Inias.” Balthazar had no idea why he was telling Benny the details of what happened between him and someone completely unrelated to him. However, here he was telling him about the stopping of the arrangement with a feeling of expectation. What was he waiting for? Was he hoping that Benny would find him single or something? Balthazar always thought he was more emotionally mature than others but not being able to pinpoint your own intentions didn’t seem mature in the least. He was as confused as a child feeling things for the first time, not knowing why they were angry but wanting to be appeased regardless. Balthazar was hoping for something, not knowing what it was, but wanted Benny to deliver regardless.

             “You miss him?” It wasn’t anything Balthazar was hoping for. He felt a small twinge of disappointment but he pushed it down.

             “No.” Balthazar couldn’t imagine himself being attached to one of his normal partners. Inias was obedient and meek but he was still just like every other partner he ever lain with. He didn’t miss him but he couldn’t help but worry he was going to do something. “It’s complicated and I hate complications.”

            “How so?”

             “I don’t know.”

             “You have feelings for him?”

             “No.” Balthazar couldn’t believe Benny wasn’t getting this. In fact, he couldn’t believe the sudden feeling of fear that jolted through his body when he heard those words. Was he worried that Benny would get the wrong idea? Was he seriously worrying that Benny might not think he was available? He didn’t want to think about that at all. Benny was lovely eye candy but he was still his employee; his very straight employee. “Don’t you have work to do or am I just paying you to look pretty?”

             “You think I’m pretty?” Benny grinned and leaned in a bit. Balthazar’s face flushed immediately. Maybe he wasn’t as straight as he thought he was. Then again, he could just be teasing. Balthazar would feel rather foolish if he tried to flirt back only to find Benny had no intention to flirt at all. He probably just considered them friends and was teasing a little. This wasn’t the time to look weak in front of him. He was his boss and should act like it at least.

             “You’re missing the point.” Balthazar somehow was able to tell him with an unamused look. Benny’s smile turned nervous and he backed away.

             “Alright, work it is.” The man stood up and stretched. ”But I get how you feel.”

             “Andrea?”

             “She’s persistent.” He sighed as if there was much more to that story than he was telling but Balthazar didn’t press the subject. It wasn’t his place to ask. “Thankfully, that kid probably won’t be.”

              It would have been great if what Benny said was true. Balthazar would have been very happy to find that everything was settled and Inias was moving on. However, reality was much different than that and it didn’t take long before he saw Inias again.

              There was a club Balthazar frequent. It was the best to find all sorts of future partners and  one night stands. Everyone here didn’t judge anyone for what persuasion they may fancy or be. It was a place to just let go and enjoy the night. Everyone here was drinking, doing some sort of recreational drug or both. No one tattled on anyone here and nothing was ever as it seemed around here. Balthazar didn’t use whatever drug was now in vogue but he couldn’t say he had never used ever in his life. There was a time when he was young and foolish. Thankfully, he had grown from that stage but he wasn’t the one to condemn others when they weren’t affecting him. So, he just politely declined whenever he was offered any.

             This club was the number one place any good student wouldn’t be caught dead in. It was a club that no one, not even its many patrons, wanted others to know they frequented. It was one whispered about but never brought up in polite conversation. Obviously, not one a good kid like Inias should be showing up at but there he was approaching the bar looking completely out of place.

             “Inias, please.” Balthazar brought his drink closer to him unconsciously.“This isn’t your scene.”

             “I just want to be close to you.” Inias told him as he found his way to an unoccupied seat next to him.

             “Don’t be creepy.” Balthazar couldn’t help but think the boy was sounding a tad bit stalkerish at the moment. He was not in the mood to have some crazy complication ruin his night. Inias seemed to be taking clingy to a whole new level.

             It seemed like the young man was realizing how strange his actions probably seemed. Perhaps he was thinking back on what he had previously said and how clingy he had been. It didn’t really matter to Balthazar what he thought about himself but he hoped the boy realized that this route wasn’t helping. It wasn’t like following the object of your affections around was going to make them suddenly turn to you; it was more of a turn off than anything else.

             “Balthazar, please.” Inias looked defeated but he wasn’t admitting any of it. He was still pleading like he had that morning. When would he realize that this was futile? “Just let me try and court you. Go on a few dates with me. If you don’t like me then, I’ll stop.”

              He had no idea if there was any truth to his words but if there was a chance he could get him to back off, he probably should take it. If not he risked Inias chasing him around relentlessly until he went insane. He was sure that was bound to happen seeing Inias was not intimidated by his surroundings. He came to Balthazar with a mission. He was right that morning; he was strong and that was the problem.

              “A few dates.” No. If he said a few dates, Inias would just hound him for more. There was no set number and it would be easy to complain that there wasn’t enough. If Balthazar was going to be rid of him, he’d have to give him a number. “Alright. Three.”

             “Three. Right.” Inias didn’t seem to mind that number. In fact, he seemed very pleased with it as if it was all he needed. The youth had such confidence. “Thank you.”

             He left immediately after the deal which was no surprise to Balthazar. Of course, Inias wouldn’t last in this club; he really didn’t see why he came in the first place. Love was apparently a horrible poison that caused people to become complete idiots; Balthazar wanted none of that. Hopefully, he could prove to Inias how incompatible they were during their dates and Inias would choose to leave first. That would be ideal.

             “You going to go on a date, Balth?” A beautiful drag-queen asked sliding in the chair next to him. “ You sure you want to do that? After all that drama before?”

             “If it will stop him from badgering me, I’ll humor him a bit.”

             “Aren’t you afraid it will just make it worse?”

             It could make it worse; Balthazar had entertained the thought but what other choice did he have. Besides, if Inias was a creepy stalker it really didn’t matter what he did in the end. He doubted the boy was capable of that level of clingy-ness but he has been wrong before. There could be some hidden issues he never bothered to find out about.

             It didn’t matter at the moment. He was sure it would matter later but what was done was done and there was no way to change the past. He would love to sometimes. It would be great just to be able to go back into the past and change all the things he didn’t like. However, the cruel reality was that there was no way to do such a thing and he had already agreed. Hopefully, he could convince Inias to give up on him during these dates.

             He returned to work no less worried but he knew he no longer had to hide in his office. Today, Charlie was going to get acquainted with the morning shift and meet Benny for the first time. She would be taking his place as the extra help provided for Castiel and Benny. Charlie was amazing at her job and everyone loved her. Even if one of them were absent, he was sure she could handle the extra load easily.

             When he entered the store, it was only Benny preparing inside. He was slowly taking down the chairs from on top of the tables and wiping everything down. At least, Benny always came early to set up. He always took his job seriously and that was something Balthazar was glad about. It would be horrible to have another Ruby working under him. Charlie was late, however. He figured it would be a while before Charlie came in since she wasn’t use to waking up early.

             “Balth, Sam asked me to be a part of his proposal. Are you going to be in it?” Benny asked as Balthazar neared the counter.

             “Of course, they are my friends.” He looked at the time and wondered if Charlie would be in in time to learn how to bake muffins. It wouldn’t be much of a problem while Benny worked. He was sure Benny could figure his way around the oven. However, Balthazar wasn’t sure he’d be able to teach Benny his method without getting distracted regularly.

            “I got no fancy clothes.” Benny complained looking down at himself. Balthazar held his tongue. He almost blurted out that Benny shouldn’t wear anything if he had no clothes to wear. He was pretty sure that was sexual harassment and he shouldn’t even try to utter it. However, it did bring up a delightful mental image that unfortunately, didn’t help Benny’s problem.

             “I could help!” A voice spoke behind him. Turning around, Balthazar saw a familiar shade of red hair. The pale woman smiled nervously and waved.“Charlie Bradbury, I kinda work here too.”

            “Oh yes, you haven’t met Charlie yet.” Balthazar moved out of her way to let the woman by. Benny looked at her confused but smiled at her kindly.

            “Hello there, Charlie.”

              “I like him.” Charlie told Balthazar in a hushed voice. “He reminds me of a teddy bear.”

               “You see that too?” Balthazar was surprised he wasn’t the only one that noticed how cuddly Benny looked; He knew there was a reason Charlie was one of his favorite employees. He straightened up when he noticed Benny looking over his way with a confused expression. Clearing his throat, Balthazar tried to pretend he wasn’t just whispering about him. “Anyway, Charlie usually works later but I thought to give her some extra hours.”

              “I need it for comic con.”

                “For what?” Benny looked concerned and Balthazar couldn’t blame him.

                “Just smile and nod.”

              “Seriously?” Charlie looked between the two like they had just insulted her entire being. “Who doesn’t know about Comic con? Whatever. I can help you find a suit.”

              “Really, you’d do that for me?” The two only just met but Charlie was already ready to help Benny out. This was a good thing; it meant that the two of them would most likely get along.

               “Why not?” Charlie shrugged and immediately went to find an apron. Benny watched her walk away in awe. Balthazar supposed it was rather strange to receive help from someone you just met. At least, he hoped that was why Benny was looking at her that way. If it was for any other reason, he was in a world of hurt; Charlie doesn’t swing his way.

               The day went smoothly; Benny and Charlie did well together as co-workers. It didn’t take long for them to understand how to work together. This was good because it meant it was one less thing Balthazar had to worry about. Hopefully,  there would be even less to worry about after those dates he promised Inias.

               This was no place to think about something troubling like that. He had work to be done and other things to think about. Like Benny checking his phone with a conflicted expression. Balthazar didn’t want to ask what was wrong because he knew he shouldn’t get into Benny’s personal business but it didn’t mean he wasn’t curious.

              “I need a new phone.” Benny said without even looking up from his phone.

              “Then get one.”

             “You make everything sound so easy.” It was simple though and Balthazar couldn’t see why Benny didn’t think it was. Obviously, if someone was bothering you on the phone and you thought you should get a new one, shouldn’t you? It might be because money was an issue. Balthazar could understand that. Not everyone had enough to change phones at the drop of a hat.

            Benny sighed heavily. It was one of those sighs that asked for attention. Something people did when they wanted someone to look at them and notice their dilemma. Balthazar never thought Benny would be the one to do something like that but then again, he didn’t really know the man that well. He was capable of anything.

             “Well, what should I do about it?” Benny asked gesturing to the phone.

              “That’s all on you. It isn’t my problem.” Balthazar shrugged trying to look indifferent. However, there was something inside him that wanted Benny to burn the phone. The thought of that woman still bothering Benny unsettled him. It didn’t make sense since Benny could more than handle himself but Balthazar just didn’t like her. She was too clingy. It reminded him too much of his own problem and if he could just get rid of his phone and be done with it, he would. “Besides didn’t I just give you some sound advice?”

             “What would you do? Get rid of the phone altogether or block her number?”

             “New phone. She could always call from another line.”

             “Good point.” Benny nodded and placed the phone in his back pocket. “Hey, Balth. You, uh, doing anything later today?”

              “Me?” The question caught Balthazar off guard. They were just talking about phones and now Benny wanted to ask him about his plans? Where was this going? A part of him was excited wondering if Benny was going to ask him out somewhere. However, he buried that feeling somewhere deep inside. There was no way that Benny could be doing that; he was straight, right? “I’m not sure.”

             “Oh, cause Elizabeth got this new place and was going to throw a housewarming party. I’m trying to get as many people to go as possible. She doesn’t have many friends.” Benny told him with a smile that made his chest feel light. He then turned to look at Charlie coming back with fresh clean cups. “You are invited too, uh, Charlie.”

             Balthazar felt a bit disappointed that Benny was inviting just anyone. He had hoped he was somewhat special but instead, the man invited Charlie, who he had just met. If he could invite her, he was probably just inviting anyone in hopes Elizabeth made friends or something. Balthazar was probably invited out of politeness being his boss and all.

             “Elizabeth single?”

             “Elizabeth is straight.” Benny was quick wasn’t he? He knew exactly what Charlie was after.

            “Well, there might be other ladies there.” Charlie shrugged and Benny nodded.

            “Yeah, there probably will be.” He then turned to look at Balthazar. “And Balth, there might be guys there too.”

            “Oh, there doesn’t need to be guys to have me attend a party. I’m easy.”

             “Balth, don’t say that about yourself.” Benny looked concerned for some reason. It took a while for Balthazar to realize they just hit some sort of language barrier. He recalled Americans usually said someone was easy when they were easy to get into bed. Shaking his head, Balthazar clarified.

             “I mean I don’t care either way.”   

             The bell sounded and that meant a customer. Just because they entered the store didn’t mean they were coming for the cafe but Balthazar was sure there was a higher chance they were. Apparently, more people came for the drinks than for the books. Peering out from the back towards the cafe, Balthazar noticed Inias coming in and stiffened immediately. What was he doing there? Benny seemed to notice the college student as well and walked towards the counter faster than he had seen him move before.

             “Hello there.” Benny greeted Inias with a tight smile.

             “I’m not here to see you.” Inias glared at Benny immediately when he saw him. Balthazar sighed. This couldn’t be happening.

             “Well, if I heard right, Balth said you and him are through.”

             “Well, you heard wrong because we have a date to plan.” Inias told him, his voice getting louder. Benny shook his head and leaned on the counter.

            “I’m pretty sure I heard right, kid.”

             “Don’t call me kid.” Inias growled.

             “Inias, what are you doing here?” Balthazar had hoped that agreeing to the dates would stop these bothersome encounters. There was no reason for Inias to be at the cafe causing trouble.

             “I just wanted to set up our date.”

             “Look just figure out the details and text it to me.” Balthazar waved his phone in front of him and gestured to the door. If Inias wasn’t here as a customer, there was no reason for him to stay. “Don’t cause scenes in my cafe.”

             “Woah, what’s going on?” Benny seemed genuinely shocked. Inias just smiled smugly and left with a new bounce in his step. Benny shook his head as he watched him leave. Turning away, he looked at Balthazar with a questioning and somewhat tense look. Balthazar didn’t know why he felt uncomfortable under his stare. “I thought you broke it off with him?”

             “He wants to court me so, I’m giving him a chance.” It was hard to say and he couldn’t figure out why. He felt like he was doing something he shouldn’t have been doing; as if he was guilty of some wrong doing. Was it because he could be making matters worse or because he was speaking to Benny? It shouldn’t matter either way; it was just a few dates.

             “Why?”

              “Because it’s the only way for him to let go.”

               “Right.” Benny didn’t seem that convinced. In fact, he didn’t seem that happy with the information either. Was he wrong? He knew one of his club friends had said that it may make it worse. Perhaps it would but what other choice did he have? Inias would keep pestering him regardless.

             “Is there a problem?”

              “Nah.” Benny was lying. They didn’t even know each other that long but Balthazar could tell. He was avoiding looking him in the eye and rubbing the back of his neck. He didn’t believe a word Balthazar had said about Inias letting go. He didn’t even seem to like the idea. There was a problem and he wasn’t telling him. “Kid’s just persistent, I hear you. Maybe you’ll fall for him in time.”

             “Doubtful.” Balthazar sighed. This was the same mentality Inias had. Why did people think that after a few dates he was going to magically fall in love. He knew Inias at his most intimate moments and still hadn’t felt anything for him. It wasn’t like a romantic dinner was going to change his mind. “If I felt nothing for him when we had our fun, why would I feel for him now?”

               “Had your fun?” Charlie chose this time to pop into their conversation. She had been in the back still when Benny had been speaking to Inias and hadn’t gotten the whole scoop. Balthazar forgot how Charlie liked being in the know. “What is going on here?”

             “Balth’s old friend with benefits is bugging him for a date.”It was a simple explanation and Balthazar couldn’t say it was wrong. Inias was bothering him for those dates and now that he had them, who knows what would happen. Charlie nodded when Benny explained with a pensive look.

             “I say date him and see if you fall for him. I mean you can’t live your life alone can you?”

              “I can and I shall.” Why did everyone think he couldn’t live on his own? Sure, he didn’t want to die alone but he had a long time before his natural death. He was merely in his forties after all. It wasn’t like he was already able to get the early bird special; he was still somewhat young. He could still live without a significant other. He didn’t like being tied down anyway. Things got messy when you were with someone exclusively and he never really loved anyone before.

              Perhaps he couldn’t love. Maybe he just wasn’t programed to love anyone. He didn’t want to believe that was true but the facts were staring at him in the face. He had never loved anyone before, not romantically at least. Maybe it was his fate to be alone for the rest of his life and he should be fine with that. He never liked being tied down, so who cares? Then why did he feel a strange dip in his heart at the thought?

             “Harsh.” Benny commented bringing back his attention. Balthazar’s head whipped over to his direction quickly and the man could do nothing but put his hands up in defense. “No disrespect, brother. No disrespect.”

             Did everyone else find the way he lived his life to be horrible? Did they all think he was just some cruel person playing with other’s emotions? Didn’t he have a right to refuse who he didn’t love? They couldn’t possibly want him to tie himself down to the first person that offers forever just for the sake of not being alone. Didn’t he have a right to be happy?

             Even if he did live the rest of his life in his empty apartment; even if he spent everyday partying until he could no longer move, it was none of their business. He wasn’t hurting them. He had the right to live his life on his own terms. However, they were both looking at him with mixed emotions. Charlie had some understanding in her expression but there was also confusion. Benny seemed more surprised and unhappy but there was one emotion Balthazar could see clearly in their eyes. He didn’t even want to look at them because of the way that emotion made him feel. They both looked at him with pity in their eyes.

            “If you are all done judging me, may I suggest working?” Balthazar didn’t mean to say it harshly but he couldn’t take them staring at him like that. There was nothing to pity him about. He was completely satisfied in life. They should worry more about themselves and do their jobs.

            The text came later that shift. Inias couldn’t wait for their first date and suggested that they go out that very night. Balthazar thought about it; Elizabeth’s housewarming party was that night. Then, he recalled those twin looks of pity and sighed. Benny was only inviting him to be polite and he didn’t think he could stomach those looks again. He agreed to go on the date and decided he would just tell Benny later that he couldn’t make it to Elizabeth’s party; he’d understand.

             That night, Inias insisted that he drove Balthazar to the venue. Apparently, he was going all out and it was just the first date. It was a typical romantic date, a fancy restaurant with dim lighting. It was a nice place that Balthazar hadn’t the privilege of dining at. However, it wasn’t anything that was going to move his heart and make him fall in love with him. He hoped Inias would understand that a fancy dinner wasn’t going to buy his love.

              Inias talked a lot about school and things people of Balthazar’s age wouldn’t care for. The conversations weren’t particularly boring but he couldn’t help thinking about a party that was going on while they ate. Benny seemed rather disappointed when he canceled on him. More disappointed than he had anticipated. Balthazar wondered if Benny really did consider them friends and had thought to invite him with more than just curtesy.

               When the bill came, Inias was adamant that he should pay. Balthazar resisted a little but he knew it was Inias’s right to pay. Inias was the one who invited him and therefore should treat. However, it was rude to just allow him to treat without any resistance. Balthazar had learned this dance a long time ago.

              He did use to date and there was once a time he tried to have relationships. They all never worked out because of Balthazar’s heart. He just couldn’t find himself in love with any of his partners. He never thought much of them and when they left, he never felt devastated or hurt. He always considered himself strong but was he truly incapable of love? It bothered him a little because although he found love to be a silly and harmful emotion, he was a bit envious of those who possessed it. He saw how happy Castiel got when he saw Dean. How his face just lit up and everything seemed perfect for him in those moments. Would he never experience that?

             “You really aren’t interested at all?” Inias spoke as they walked towards Balthazar’s apartment. He hadn’t meant to get lost in his own head but he just wasn’t interested in the frivolous topics Inias chose to speak about.

             “I’m sorry but-” Balthazar sighed and looked towards his door. He was glad to be home. The date wasn’t a disaster but it certainly was a waste of time. “We should just stay friends.”

              “We can’t even be that according to what you said earlier.” Inias reminded him with a disappointed look. Balthazar realized that he didn’t really care that Inias was disappointed in him. He didn’t really care that he had made the younger man upset. He didn’t care at all like he had when Benny had the same expression. He felt guilty when he saw Benny disappointed when he said he couldn’t go. But with Inias, there was nothing. “Well, I have two more dates so, I’ll just have to try harder.”

             “Perhaps, but I’m not the type to fall for people. I never have and never will.”

             “Isn’t that lonely though?” Lonely? Balthazar never really thought much about being lonely. He was always too busy to entertain the thought. The idea of it unsettled him and he wished he didn’t have to think about it.“I don’t want you to be alone, Balthazar. I’ll never let that happen if you choose to be with me.”

             “Thank you but I am fine on my own.” He forced out and quickly entered his apartment shutting the door behind him before Inias could say anything more.

              Something had changed. His apartment was no longer a small, practical living space. Instead, it had grown too big, way too big. There was too much empty space in this apartment and it was too big for just him. He leaned his back against the door. He didn’t bother turning on the lights in this dark, empty apartment.

            Sliding down to the ground, Balthazar realized something. There was nothing in this apartment. There was no life, no warmth or anything. He thought back to Elizabeth’s party. Her house was probably full of family and friends where his had no one. Benny was there too probably laughing and enjoying himself surrounded by many friends. He could have been there too. He could have been laughing with Benny and enjoying himself. Any place with Benny in it was sure to feel warm and safe. He thought about all those people enjoying each other’s company and how wonderful it must be. Her house was a home filled with love and warmth. His apartment wasn’t a home at all; it was just empty and cold. He brought his knees to his chest and sighed.

             He had never felt so alone before.


	7. Rule Number 6: Don’t Get Involved In Each Other’s Lives

             Balthazar was only seeing how things were doing in the cafe. Now that Charlie was there to help out in the mornings, he really didn’t have a reason to be there. He made sure that any time Benny worked, Charlie was there too. The two were becoming fast friends. It was good that they got along, it made things smoother.

             But despite how well it was going, he just wanted to check. It wasn’t because he missed seeing a certain southern employee. He wasn’t hoping to speak to Benny at all. No, he was just going to ask Ruby how things were going. He wasn’t thinking of even looking in the direction of the cafe and seeing that attractive employee of his. He hadn’t spent all morning practicing saying hello to him. It wasn’t that he wanted to see him. No, not at all.

              When he entered the bookstore, Ruby was filing her nails with a familiar bored expression. It was early so not many people had come into the store for books. They were more interested in waking up than reading. Looking towards the cafe, he noticed a woman chatting with Benny and Benny looking rather uncomfortable. The lady tried placing a hand on Benny’s arm but he moved out of the way and shook his head. There was something strange with the way they were talking. Balthazar would have assumed she was just some woman harassing his employees but Benny was looking at her with much more meaning than that. She was someone he knew.

            “Who’s that?” He asked Ruby, who immediately stopped filing her nails and glanced up at him. With an exaggerated sigh, as if it took a bunch of physical effort, she turned to look over at the two still in the middle of a conversation.

             “She apparently has come here more than once.” Ruby explained with a bored tone surprising Balthazar. Usually, she had no idea who anyone was. She couldn’t even be bothered to remember her coworkers’ names.“She made a scene yesterday.”

             “What do you mean?”

             “She was shouting.” Ruby didn’t bother elaborating why she was shouting or explaining what made her so upset. Instead, she just shrugged as if causing a scene in a cafe was not the craziest thing she had seen. “It was the only reason I noticed her.”

             “I can believe it.” Balthazar wondered why he ever looked for her for information. So, this woman was a recurring offender but there was more to it. Familiarity could come from her showing up more than once but the hurt that was in Benny’s eyes came from something much deeper than just harassment. She was something to him.

              It didn’t seem she was leaving any time soon and Balthazar did have a business he would like to continue. How could Benny take any orders when that woman was blocking the way to the cash register. What was Charlie doing during this scene and where was Castiel? Were they avoiding the area because they felt awkward about it? This wouldn’t do. He had to put a stop to this before another scene broke out.

            “I beg your pardon, miss.” Balthazar tapped her shoulder with a tight smile. “Do you have any business here?”

            “I do.” The woman turned to look at him with her jaw tightened in anger. Balthazar didn’t know her at all so it would be ridiculous of her to point that anger towards him. “Benny and I have something we need to talk about.”

            “We’ve talked about it plenty.” Benny sighed and placed his hands on the counter. He leaned down and shook his head. It was obvious he had been dealing with this for a while and was exhausted from it. “Stop rehashing the same ol’ argument and just understand there ain’t nothing that is gonna make me go back to Louisiana. I’m done with that life.”

             “Benny, we were so good together.” She insisted trying to grab one of his arms again. Once more, Benny moved away from her touch and shook his head.

             “We can’t go back, Andrea.” He told her. She was Andrea. Balthazar remembered that name; it was of Benny’s ex that wasn’t letting go. Now he understood why Benny had been looking at her with such familiarity and pain in his expression. She was that piece of him that he was trying to let go.

            “No, you don’t understand.” Andrea pleaded and Balthazar was growing angrier at the second. She should realize that Benny didn’t want her anymore. He had seen how many times Benny looked down at his phone with a mixed expression. He knew how tired Benny sounded everytime he mentioned her. He, also, remembered the lipstick on his collar that one day. All of it was coming back to him and he was feeling a huge surge of anger and jealousy.

            This wasn’t his place. He should just leave the situation alone since it had nothing to do with him. Balthazar never liked when things got messy and this was on its way to being that way. Andrea had some fire in her eyes that not even Inias could produce. She wasn’t giving up easily and Benny was in for a long struggle. However, he couldn’t help feeling personally bothered by her clingy behavior. It wasn’t like Benny was his or anything but he couldn’t stop himself from squeezing in front of her and glaring at her regardless.

            “I think you’re the one that doesn’t understand, miss.” He told her, arms folded across his chest. Andrea was a little taken aback. She wasn’t expecting someone to interfere in their conversation and frankly, Balthazar was surprised by his own actions as well.

           “This isn’t any of your business.” She wasn’t wrong when she told him that. It really wasn’t any of Balthazar’s business. If this was any other employee, he would just tell them to take it outside; he wouldn’t get directly involved with the situation. So, what was he doing here?

           “This is my bookstore and my cafe. If you cause a scene, it is my business.”

            “Yeah, go away you’re scaring away the customers and Castiel.” Charlie called out from the back making Andrea look rather offended. Balthazar had been wondering where she was. Apparently, she and Castiel were hiding in the back. There was another excuse to get involved; he couldn’t let this woman frighten away customers and his cousin.

            “We’ll talk after you get off.” Andrea told Benny with a deep frown. She didn’t seem like she really wanted to leave but she was a bit outnumbered.

            “No, you won’t.” Balthazar said before he could stop himself. The situation was solved as far as he would usually be concerned but this was about Benny. It seemed he couldn’t just let it be when it came to his new employee.“You will leave immediately and leave him be.”

            “Excuse me?”

            “Harassing my employees is also something I can’t tolerate during work or after.” He tried showing a more objective reason for why he didn’t want her anywhere near Benny. He couldn’t just tell her the truth; that her presence bothered him a lot. He didn’t want to think about why it bothered him either. “If you don’t want me calling the police about your obvious stalking tendencies, I suggest you just let him go.”

            “I’m not stalking him.”

            “You sort of are. The whole can’t stop calling him, creepily showing up at his workplace and home. Is there anywhere he can be safe from you?” Balthazar couldn’t believe she could say she wasn’t a stalker when all the evidence was staring her in the face. She even had the audacity to look shocked when he listed out the reasons for why he believed her to be a stalker. Shaking his head, he turned to look at Benny. “You know you can get a restraining order, Benny.”

             “He wouldn’t dare.” She was quite confident that Benny couldn’t be rid of her. She smiled and looked straight at Benny as if daring him to do such a thing. Balthazar could feel himself getting more irritated by the second. She could be right. Benny obviously felt something for her if he had a hard time turning her away. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to be rid of her. Maybe he was just delaying the inevitable; that they would end up together regardless.

            “Oh?” Benny hesitantly looked over at Balthazar and smiled weakly. “And how do I apply for one?”

             “Benny!” Andrea looked at him like she was viewing him for the first time. Balthazar suddenly felt a wave of confidence and turned around to look at her, not even attempting to hide the smug look on his face.

               “It appears that you aren’t wanted here.”

                “He’ll understand if I just-”

                “Leave.” He placed his hands on her shoulders and spun her around so she faced the exit. “While you have some dignity left or should I make that phone call?”

                “This isn’t over.” She called over her shoulder as she began hastily leaving.

              “Oh, it is very over.” Balthazar assured her. “You just can’t accept it.”

               He let out a long sigh once she exited the building. Benny had begun to chuckle slightly and he didn’t see what was so funny. It was exhausting dealing with problematic people; he could see why Benny seemed so drained every time he noticed a text from her. Hopefully, she got the idea and won’t be coming back to bother his employee again. After all, he only did it for the cafe. At least, he was currently trying to convince himself that that was all this was for.

               “You have some venom in that tongue of yours.” Benny commented with a smile. Balthazar rolled his eyes. He wasn’t saying anything venomously. Sure, he was a little annoyed and perhaps he did let his words come out harshly but he felt that all he did was say the truth. The woman obviously had to let go and he was just making sure she didn’t cause a scene. The anger and jealousy he felt when he saw her played a minor role in his decision; he had to keep telling himself that otherwise he wouldn’t believe it himself.

             “I don’t like it when people don’t just accept and move on.” He tried saying though he knew that wasn’t why he had said what he said. Benny nodded in understanding.

              “Like Inias?”

              Balthazar had almost forgotten about Inias. They had another date planned that evening and he was sure it was going to be just as drab as the last date they had. He wasn’t looking forward to it but if it was the only way to get Inias to give up, he would have to endure it. Being reminded of it didn’t make him feel any better though.

             “Get back to work.” He told Benny, who just nodded with a smile, “I only came in to check how things are going.”

             “Besides the small problem we just had? Been going great.”

              “Well, then. I should leave.” Balthazar waved goodbye to Charlie and Castiel, now emerging from the back since the coast was clear. “Remember tomorrow is Sam’s thing.”

              “Gotcha.”

               It seemed like everything was going to be fine now that she was gone but one thing bugged him. Earlier, when she was there, Benny mentioned not going back to a particular life. It probably meant nothing. Perhaps Benny was a fisherman of sorts; he remembered him mentioning boats with a certain type of fondness. You could hardly be a fisherman in the city so he would be giving up a lifestyle. However, the sentence still bothered him.

              He was just curious, really. He just wanted to know if he hired someone of questionable background. He had to admit the hiring process was not his most professional and he hadn’t bothered with a background check. He didn’t even know if Benny was some ex felon or not. He doubted it, Benny seemed like a rather harmless individual, but he had to make sure. He had to make a phone call.

              “Lucifer, dear cousin.” He heard a surprised murmur from the other end. Balthazar rarely spoke to his cousins but he did know how to contact them. Gabriel made sure he had up to date information despite the issues between his aunt and their father. “I need you to do something for me. I need you to look up a Benny Lafitte.”

               “And why do you need that?”

               “Standard employee background check. Check on a woman associated with him named Andrea.”

              “Standard?” Lucifer’s voice was full of amusement. “If it was standard you wouldn’t be calling me.”

             “Just get me some information.” Balthazar didn’t want to explain why he was asking Lucifer to get the information. He didn’t need to know anyway. He knew his cousins had enough money and influence to find ways to learn about people. Lucifer and Gabriel were the two that enjoyed learning about people. Gabriel had his own methods which were very creepy but Lucifer dealt with experts to find out what he needed. Even if the information was cleaned off someone’s record, he’d find it.

             “Of course, dear cousin.” He could practically hear Lucifer’s smile.  “You know how I love being sneaky.”

             Balthazar knew it wasn’t his place to dig up information on his employee and his ex. He knew this was crossing the line but he needed to know. A part of him felt jealous of Andrea for knowing a side of Benny that he did not. Before he knew it, he was making the call. He knew he it wasn’t normal to dig into someone’s past but the call had already been made. There was no stopping it now. Besides, he’d keep the information to himself and there was no way Benny would find out. If he did, he would just say it was a background check; a very thorough one.

              He had other things to worry about anyway; he had his second date with Inias. He wasn’t looking forward to it but he had already agreed to it. Thankfully, there would only be one after this and Inias would be able to see that they weren’t compatible when it came to their personalities.

             The date involved going to the movies and catching something to eat afterwards. Both required a more casual way of dressing. Balthazar wasn’t sure why Inias had chose the movies. There was no way two people could have a conversation in a movie theater, unless they wanted to get yelled at. That meant that there would be no way to understand each other, impress him or try and woo him. So, the whole activity worked against what Inias was trying to accomplish.

             Balthazar didn’t really care but he thought the boy would have come up with a much better plan. Thankfully, he didn’t go the cliche route and choose a romantic movie. Instead, they just watched an action movie that had quite a few good looking men shirtless for a while; he could appreciate that.

               They went to a small Japanese restaurant afterwards. Balthazar liked sushi but no more than other food. However, he couldn’t say it was that bad. Inias tried initiating another long, boring conversation. It was like they were throwing out their traits and experiences out for comparison. The human courtship process was ridiculously boring and useless. Since Balthazar never dealt with the long run why did it matter what annoying quirks another person had? Why did it matter about their families and past life? His family wasn’t going to be part of the relationship anyway, they were in England still.

              After yet another failed date, Inias walked Balthazar to his door. He was no where near “the girl”; the very thought that someone would assign gender roles was ridiculous. However, Inias had been treating him like one would treat a female date and that bothered him. It wasn’t that he didn’t like not having to pay and having doors opened for him, Balthazar loved it when people did those sort of things. He just didn’t like the whole feeling that Inias felt Balthazar was someone who had to be taken care of; like he was weak. He didn’t see why Inias had to walk him to his door or pull out a chair for him. He wasn’t that old.

             They said their goodbyes with nothing more than just that and Balthazar went straight to bed. Usually, he would stay up much later than this but he was exhausted.Deanling with Inias had made him physically and mentally exhausted and he knew there was no way this could last. Inias was dreaming if he thought he could get him to feel something for him; just like Andrea. Balthazar sighed as he plopped on his bed. He guessed Benny was right; Andrea and Inias were the same type of person, unable to let go. He wondered what Benny was doing at the moment. Was he exhausted too?

             Balthazar didn’t know when he fell asleep but he woke up the next day in a hurry. He had to pick up his suit from the cleaners and he had to get ready for Sam’s thing. Sam wanted them to get the roses from him before hand and there was something about standing in certain spots to wait for her. The whole thing sounded ridiculously cheesy but it was for Sam. He just hoped he wasn’t assigned to standing outside.

              When he finally got dressed and something to eat, he made his way to the cleaners. He got his good suit and slowly made his way back to his apartment. He had a lot of preparation to do. A shower, trimming his facial hair to looking cleaner and not so patchy on the sides. He read a book for a little while before placing on his suit. They weren’t going to do Sam’s thing until tonight but it was best to get there in the afternoon.His day was going pretty well despite last nights failed date. It was pretty much an easy going day until he reached Sam’s apartment building.

               There was some commotion in the lobby; the apartment building was full of so many different interesting people that this was not a rare sight. However, those participating in the commotion were the last people he thought he would see tangled up with some unneeded nonsense. Castiel was looking up at a man, who seemed rather irritated in his presence, with a very tense look. Beside him was Dean and Gabriel looking equally on edge at the man. It seemed rather interesting and something he would completely not like to get involved in. If he could walk around the group he would.

                Then he heard the most outrageous claim by the man, who didn’t seem like he had anything to do with his cousins. Balthazar knew that he didn’t go over their place for holidays and didn’t meet them one on one very often, he usually talked to them via email or phone, but he thought the whole “We have an adopted brother” thing would have come up somewhere in conversation. The guy was even calling his aunt, all of his siblings’ mother, a whore for what? A time when she got really drunk and taken advantage of? He, also, heard that this was about a will and inheritance. Were people that greedy that before their parent even dies that they were going to threaten a future recipient? Castiel was a good man and deserved every penny. There was no way he could let this stand. Seems he would have to entangle himself in this nonsense.

               Tapping on the man’s shoulder, he smiled confidently when he turned to look over at him. Judging by the look on everyone’s faces, he supposed they didn’t expect him to be here. He just hoped this wouldn’t take long; Sam was waiting for him after all.

               “Can I say something?” He spoke as politely as he could explaining what had happened. Obviously, the man needed a refresher because no one properly explained it to him. It wasn’t his aunt’s fault and he was sure his uncle still loved her. If anything it was the grandparents fault that they weren’t together anymore.

              “Well, they are dead now.” Gabriel told him offhandedly. Balthazar’s eyes widened. You’d think they would have told him that in one of their conversations. Then again, he rarely had conversations with his cousins. Everyone seemed to be very distant in that family.

                “Thank God.” He breathed out in relief  with a bit of a laugh but took notice of his cousins’ odd looks. Straightening up, he cleared his throat. “I mean. My condolences.”

               “I believe they were right to make them divorce.” The man went on not even caring that it made Gabriel very tense and looking like he was ready to fight at any moment. “He shouldn’t be forced to raise a child that wasn’t even his.”

              “So, what are you exactly?” Balthazar questioned a bit confused gaining a giggle from Gabriel. The man obviously was adopted seeing that he had a very dark all year round tan. Did he not know? “I think you need to stop being such a thick-headed hypocrite. I mean aren’t you getting some inheritance?”

              “Not as much as he is.” The man stated with a growl. “I have stayed by father's side. I have done everything he wanted me to. He doesn't even know our father. How could he give a stranger more than me?”

             “Oh well!” Balthazar laughed. “That’s not our problem.”

              It really wasn’t their problem what his uncle decided to do with his money. He had a right to give his money to whoever he chose. The man didn’t believe that to be so though as he whipped around and looked Balthazar over. A wave of familiarity showed on his face as he pressed closer and Balthazar couldn’t see why. They had never met before but he supposed one of his cousins must have mentioned him.

             “This is none of your business, you limey little whore.” The man spat and raised his hand to strike him. Balthazar wasn’t looking for any violence when he had spoke up for his aunt and was ill prepared to stop it. He didn’t know any amazing fighting moves; all he could do was close his eyes and hope it didn’t leave a mark. But he didn’t feel anything; there was no pain, pressure or anything.

              “Now now, brother.” He heard a smooth, southern voice say. He knew that voice. Opening his eyes hesitantly, he noticed Benny was there and he had grabbed the man’s wrist stopping him from harming him. “You should take back those words you said and apologize to the nice gentleman.”

             “Benny?” Balthazar was confused, he hadn’t seen Benny around when he was talking to the man. When did he get there? The look in Benny’s eyes was downright dangerous and it sent a delighted chill down Balthazar’s spine. He could see as Benny gripped the man’s wrist all those lovely arm muscles all tensed up. He almost forgot where he was for a moment.

             “I am not your brother.” The man growled, pulling his arm back, and Benny just gave him a tense smile.

             “Is that right?” Benny seemed to be feigning confusion with a hint of amusement behind it. “I would have never known.”

               “Just leave, Raphael.” Gabriel spoke up chewing on gummy bears or something. He was always eating some sort of candy.

              “I will do no such thing.” The man, Raphael, said. Balthazar rolled his eyes. What was with all these people that just couldn’t let go?

             “We outnumber you, brother.” Benny told him after a brief look around. Then suddenly a very tense, and deliciously dangerous look appeared on his face. His nice, soft yet strong chest was puffed up as if daring the man to strike him. Balthazar almost swooned at the sight.“Now how about you take that other guy's advice before I make you wish you did.”

              The man was intimidated then and left without another word. Balthazar was glad there wasn’t going to be more to the scene the man had already caused. He was, also, thankful he didn’t have to explain a black eye to Sam. It would be horrible if he worked so hard to look nice to day only to have his face marked by a bruise. Jessica would have quite a shock if that was the case.

             “Thank you, Benny.” Balthazar felt a bit shy and couldn’t bring himself to look up at his employee’s eyes. “You didn't have to do that.”

             “He shouldn't have talk to you like that.” Benny was smiling and rubbing the back of his neck a bit. His cheeks were being dusted lightly with a slight blush and it made Balthazar smile a bit. “You didn't deserve that.”

             “Straight?” Dean teased but Balthazar made sure to send a glare his way.

             “Shut up.”

             “Why are you guys dressed so well?”  Gabriel asked and it was then Balthazar noticed the suit Benny was wearing. It was much different from anything he ever saw Benny in and it fit him so well. Balthazar’s eyes roamed all over the man’s form; oh, it fit him very well. “Going on a date?”

             If only. Balthazar thought as his cheeks began to heat up. He wasn’t one to date seriously but if Benny was on the other side of the table, he found that he may not actually mind. It would most likely be better than the failure of ones he had been having with Inias. He didn’t need Gabriel talking about things like that, it made him feel very shy and awkward. So, he decided to say nothing and just glare since he was at a loss for words.

             “What? No.” Benny was the first to respond sounding very confused. “This is for Sam.”

             Gabriel seemed to understand though he seemed a little confused by the statement. Apparently, he hadn’t known of Sam’s plans despite his superior stalking skills. Balthazar wasn’t sure if relieved or concerned by that thought. Gabriel’s tactics were peculiar but he never was out of the know. Was he losing his touch?

             There were other things to think about than Gabriel’s stalking tendencies. Gabriel was taking Castiel to get ready for Sam’s thing and he knew he had to be prepared as well. Sure, he was already dressed and he wasn’t going to do much but stand around but it was good to be early just in case. Besides, with everyone leaving the area, he was left alone with Benny and had no idea what he should say. Maybe he shouldn’t say anything and just go to Sam’s place. It wasn’t like the others had said goodbye, so, it wouldn’t be rude.

             “After this whole thing, you should come to my place.” Benny spoke before Balthazar tried to walk away. “We can hang out for a while.”

             “Oh.” What do you say to that? Balthazar didn’t know! He had been invited to homes before but that was always with the promise of more adult activities. What would they even do at Benny’s home; the guy didn’t even have a TV. Balthazar figured he could just nod  and that would be an acceptable enough response.

             He was going to Benny’s home after this. Were they going to talk? About what? Balthazar didn’t know if they even had things in common. He had been so distracted by Benny’s looks and that delicious accent that he never really thought about what Benny’s hobbies were. He knew he liked boats and use to be a cook; that was about it. Was it even right for a boss to be hanging out with his employee like this? A little voice in the back of his head told him it wasn’t right to lust for his employee either.

            He should have said no. He really had nothing to talk to Benny about and really, he only liked him for his body. He hadn’t even slept with the man but he was sure all this attachment was just branching out of his desire to sleep with him and never having it fulfilled. He had never longed for a straight man this long and knowing he was unattainable probably just made him even sexier. This was going to be a complete disaster. How was he going to control himself in that man’s house, alone, and in the middle of the night?

            He couldn’t stop thinking about it even when he greeted Jessica with a rose as he was told to. Even when she sat down with a very confused look and wondered about what they were doing. None of them told her, of course, which only made her slightly upset. Balthazar supposed getting roses from different people you knew would be very strange. Sam said it would be amazingly romantic and that he had saw it on a show at an asian market. Balthazar couldn’t believe he got the idea from an asian soap opera; it was laughable.

            So, why did he feel moved when Sam said his speech? This was the one thing Balthazar hated more than anything in the word: Commitment. He never wanted to be tied down and he definitely didn’t want to fall in love. Love was messy and could get people in all sorts of trouble but if that was all it did, why did so many people want to find it? Why did Jessica glow with happiness when Sam asked her to be his only for the rest of her life? Was there something he was missing?

             There had to be something he was missing because his apartment got more and more empty everyday. When he woke up alone in his room, there was something he could feel was missing. Everything felt cold and uninviting there but here is Sam’s living room there was nothing but warmth and love. He could feel it even if he didn’t believe in love. He could, also, feel the truth.

             He was never going to be as happy as Sam and Jessica because he would never find someone he would be willing to be tied down to. He didn’t fall in love and he didn’t have any long relationships. He was going to end up alone and he knew it. He was already in his forties and his wild life wasn’t going to pay out forever. One night stands tend to lose it’s appeal as you age and less youths would be willing to sleep with an old man. Would he still be able to hobble into clubs in his eighties?

             Who would be with him then? He didn’t want to just settle for anyone just because he didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t want to just keep someone around and be tied down just because the sex was good either. He wanted to be in love like Sam and Jessica. He wanted to be happy but he couldn’t. He had never been in love before and he never will be but that didn’t mean he didn’t feel lonely. He hadn’t noticed he had begun to cry until he saw a tissue being handed to him.

            “Never thought of you as the sensitive type.” Dean told him once he entered the elevator. Castiel, Dean and Ben were leaving the apartment for a while  in order to give the newly engaged couple some privacy. They hadn’t figured out where they would go, however.

             Balthazar never responded to Dean’s comment. Instead, he tried his best to compose himself. He was supposed to go to Benny’s after this but how could he with the way he was now? He was his boss and possibly a friend; he couldn’t show this weak side of himself. Showing this was too close and he already accidentally showed everyone in Sam’s apartment this embarrassing side of him. He saw no reason to further embarrass himself. So, he didn’t budge when Dean pressed for the lobby.

            “Hey, I thought you were going to Benny’s after this?” Without getting an answer from Balthazar, Dean pushed the button on the elevator to go to the second floor. He shouldn’t have ever told him about that. Now there was no turning back. When the doors opened, he didn’t want to leave but he couldn’t just stay in the elevator, they would know something was the matter.

            “Right.” Slowly, he exited the elevator and headed towards Benny’s door. Just before he knocked, a thought struck him. He didn’t have to knock and he didn’t have to go in. He could just wait outside until he was sure Dean and the others were gone. Then, he would sneak out of the apartment building and text Benny that he couldn’t make it.

             Balthazar slid onto the floor and waited. The bad part about waiting in silence was all you had were your thoughts. Balthazar didn’t want to think about any of those depressing things any longer. He didn’t want to worry about his future. He just wanted to enjoy the present for as long as he could even if it didn’t last forever. Bringing his knees to his chest, Balthazar sighed. They should be gone by now. He could leave but where would he go? Back to that empty apartment of his? The door swung open before he could even make a decision to where he wanted to go.

             “Balth, what are you doing?” Benny asked looking down concerned. Balthazar wondered why Benny was even looking out his door. It wasn’t like he knocked or anything. That’s when he noticed his face felt a bit wet. Why was this happening to him? He was always so emotionally mature before. Was he having a midlife crisis? Was it male menopause? No! He couldn’t be that old; he was only in his forties! Yet, here he was sobbing like a girl hiding in the bathroom from a horrible day at high school; it was humiliating.

             “Don’t.” It wasn’t everything he wanted to say but he thought it was enough. He didn’t want anything from Benny except for him to go back into his apartment and forget what he saw. He never cried in front of others; it wasn’t his style. He was strong and always in control but now he felt like he wasn’t. When he saw Sam and Jessica together, he realized that there were things he couldn’t control. Those two had inside their hands the key to their happiness but he had nothing. He couldn’t control how he felt. He couldn’t make himself love someone. Love wasn’t something anyone could force. It was a feeling that just came naturally, spontaneously and he hated that. It wasn’t something he could control so it scared him but being alone for the rest of his life was equally frightening. His future was more and more unclear and he hated it. The bookstore was doing well now but there was still a lot he had to do in order to make sure he could pay all his employees decent wages; he needed more workers in the store part but didn’t have enough pay for them. Ruby wouldn’t work there forever. Then there was Inias. Inias wouldn’t let go and was causing him to worry about having a much bigger complication when the third date flops; what if he gets worse instead of giving up? And now, he has been reminded time and time again that he would be alone forever because his lifestyle couldn’t last forever. He always knew it wouldn’t but he was young and foolish. He had so much fun and one day he woke up and he was forty-five. He just wasn’t strong enough to handle all of it. He felt like he was losing his grasp on everything he held to so dear. He was once confident, strong and in control and now, none of that was true.

              “Balth.”

             “He was right, you know.” Balthazar spoke to drown out anything Benny wanted to say. He didn’t want to hear the pity in his voice. But when he began to spoke all he could do was think back to Raphael and what he said. “I am a whore.”

             “What?” Benny seemed shocked by what he said; Balthazar could have laughed at it. He knew he was promiscuous and wild. It wasn’t like this was news to him. Sure, he never got paid for his activities but that didn’t mean he couldn’t use that word to describe himself. He felt that was what he was in the end; an old whore. Benny crouched down to his level and shook his head. “No, you’re not.”

              He was just trying to comfort him. Men will say anything to stop feeling so awkward and unsettled around another’s emotions. He knew because that’s how he felt all the time; what made Benny any different? This made Balthazar feel more frustrated and soon the frustration became more than the hurt he felt. Every time someone called him a whore, it hurt. He pretended it didn’t but it always did. Everyone said it even his friends at the club. They all joked about it and probably didn’t mean any harm but it still hurt. They said it so many times that now he could see they were right. He believed them. Now, Benny was trying to say he wasn’t when he had just accepted it? What gave him the right? What gave anyone the right to say what he was?

             “Look at me.” Balthazar said looking at Benny with frustration clear in his eyes and dried tear tracks on his cheeks. “I’m forty-five and I have no one. Sam and Jess are getting married. They’ll go home everyday and see someone but me? I’ll always have no one.”

             “That’s not true.” Benny tried telling him but Balthazar knew he had no idea. How could Benny see into the future and know he wouldn’t be alone? “That can’t be true. Come on. Come inside.”

             “No, I shouldn’t.” Balthazar had already said too much, gotten too close and now everything was ruined. No one had ever seen him like this, not even his own family. He was vulnerable and he didn’t want to be. He wanted to go back to when he didn’t care. Why did he have to care? When did he begin to think about these horrible things? “I shouldn’t be here.”

             “I invited you and you agreed.” Benny grabbed his arm and pulled him to his feet. Balthazar didn’t protest because he figured he made enough of a scene. Even if there was no one in the hallway, he still felt awful about it. This wasn’t like him. Benny just chuckled and dusted him off though. “Rude to turn back now. Come on. I have some beers.”

             “I could use that, yes.” Beers sounded good. Balthazar could forget everything after a few drinks and he really wanted to forget about things now. He sat down on Benny’s couch for a while drinking a few beers as Benny talked about his life growing up. He talked about his brother and a few things they use to do as kids. Balthazar merely listened because he didn’t know what to say to him otherwise. He had already made an embarrassment of himself and had gotten way too close, there was nothing else he could say anyway. Benny didn’t need stories of his childhood to know him; he already showed his most vulnerable state to him.

             “I apologize for the scene I made.” Balthazar found himself finally saying halfway through Benny’s alligator story. The southern man just chuckled and shook his head.

             “We’re friends. Don’t worry about it.” He told Balthazar. “It comes with the territory.”

              Friends saw each other in such states? He knew that he saw plenty of his friends in terrible situations and states but he never thought he was allowed to be that way. He was the one they went to, the one that had everything under control and could give them advice. It was just who he was. That was what he was with any of his friends: the wise, more mature friend. Those types don’t sit outside their friend’s apartments crying about stupid things.

                It was getting late. He knew because of the watch on Benny’s arm. If he didn’t have that antique thing, Balthazar wouldn’t know how long he had been there. It hadn’t seemed like long but he had been there well past the amount of time he usually visited people. Well, without sex that is. He never really just sat there and talked to any of his partners. If they did talk it was probably for ten to twenty minutes. Yet, here, they had talked for hours. Well, Benny did most of the talking.

              “It’s midnight.” Balthazar announced seeing if Benny knew how late it was. The man seemed just as shocked at the time as he was.

              “You can crash on my couch if you want.” He suggested.

               “In a suit? No, thank you.” Balthazar didn’t trust himself sleeping in the same apartment as Benny. He couldn’t trust that he wouldn’t try to sneak any peaks at the handsome southerner. “I should go. I’ll see you at work.”

                “That you will.”

                Balthazar waved goodbye and left quickly. He wasn’t looking forward to having to see Benny at work; it would be so awkward. Benny saw him at his worst; there was no way he could woo him now. Not like he had a chance before. Balthazar sighed. It was time to go back to his apartment. His very empty apartment.


	8. Rule Number 7: Don’t Accept or Give Gifts

              Balthazar couldn’t believe how embarrassing he had been. He couldn’t believe Benny saw him in that state. How could he go to work knowing he had already showed his most vulnerable side; he hadn’t even shown his parents that side since he was five. He could continue avoiding Benny, it wasn’t like he hadn’t already planned to avoid him but the idea seemed childish now.

             Who cared if he was childish? Balthazar rolled himself in his sheets. He wasn’t coming out of them today. He was the owner of that store and he was allowed certain days off. He could just stay under his sheets until he didn’t feel embarrassed by his own behavior the night before. By the way things were going, he might have to take several days off.

             No, he couldn’t hide in his bed, he was a grown man! He had to push aside any personal feelings and get back to work because that was how professionals did it. If Benny brought it up, he’d just brush it off. If it was any other problem, he would do that, why should this be any different? He had to pull himself together, he couldn’t live his life like this. Pretend nothing happened; he could do that.

             There was no point in hiding away or avoiding Benny. It was best to face this head on so that it would dissolve quicker. But there was no reason that he had to go to work in the morning. He could just deal with everything after Benny’s shift but that would be too childish and obvious that he was avoiding him. He had to go just to prove he wasn’t affected, even though he was.

             When he entered the bookstore, he was sure he was just going to get his work done and just ignore Benny’s presence. Perhaps he would greet him,  just so his employee didn’t realize he was ignoring him, then get to work. He had everything figured out until the door opened behind him revealing a mail man looking very confused and holding a small cardboard box.

             “I have a package for a Benny Laffite.” How odd that it would be sent at his workplace and not his home. Unless, the sender had a message they were trying to send to everyone here. What sort of message could that be?

             “How brave of her.” Ruby tsked and looked right at Balthazar with a knowing look.

             “Ruby.” Balthazar was shocked that she even noticed someone entered the bookstore. Some how she was watching with interest like someone had just released her from the spell she had been over. Suddenly, she saw the world and not just her energy drinks and music. “You’re actually paying attention.”

           “Bite me.” She said it in such a tone that didn’t sound as fierce as it sounded bored. Then again, Ruby always sounded bored.

           “Not into your flavor, dear.” He turned away from her with a playful expression. Rolling her eyes, Ruby looked towards Benny who was jogging over to the mail person. Balthazar noticed Benny seemed a little more unkempt than he usually was. His attire seemed rushed as if he had just woken up moments before he had came to work. Half his shirt was tucked and the other half wasn’t. He seemed to have two different types of socks on as well. Did he have trouble sleeping like him? Did he rush to go to work because he woke up too late?

           Benny grabbed the box from the mail person and stared at it. Looking rather confused, the man shook the box but not a sound came from it. Either it as something that fit rather snug in the box or was wrapped in a ridiculous amount of bubble wrap.

           “What is it?” Balthazar couldn’t hide his curiosity and he had forgotten all about the night before. Now he was just interested in whoever did send a box to Benny here of all places.

           “It’s from Andrea.” Of course, it was. That woman truly couldn’t let go no matter what happened. She was like some sort of curse set upon his store that would forever haunt it no matter what he had done.

           “Called it.” Ruby said in that same bored tone as if she wasn’t even happy she was right.

           “Did you leave anything with her?” Balthazar was wondering if Andrea was trying to make a statement or just didn’t want to send it to his home. Was it something Benny left? Was she trying to say she would move on publicly?

             “Nothing really.” Benny shrugged not seeming to worry about the contents of the box or what it could mean. “I took everything of mine with me.”

            “Then, it’s either a head of an animal or a gift.” Ruby told them both.

             “Head of an animal?” Balthazar was shocked by what she said. Why would she even think that? “Really?”

             “Hey, some people are crazy.” Ruby spoke up defensively. She nodded her head towards the box eager to see Benny open it but the man hesitated in taking it from the mail delivery person. Everyone was staring at her even the mail carrier. Ruby’s eyes darted from each of their concerned faces.“What?”

            “Probably a gift.” Benny was the first to recover, shaking his head in disbelief. “Andrea loves animals.”

            “Send it back.” Balthazar turned to the mail carrier pushing the package back towards him.

             “What?” It was clear Benny didn’t understand why Balthazar didn’t want him to keep it. It was such an obvious thing to Balthazar. Andrea hadn’t given up and accepting it would only encourage her further.

            “Excuse me, can you return it to the sender?” Balthazar asked the man without even asking for Benny’s opinion. He wasn’t about to let Andrea sink her claws into Benny again. He had to admit, part of him was worried that Andrea would worm her way back into his heart. Benny did seem like he was having a hard time denying her. Usually, he wouldn’t get involved with sticky situations like that but he couldn’t help it. The moment he thought of Andrea continuing her pursuit, he threw all of his rules out the window. He didn’t want her to have him because he was jealous. Balthazar had come to terms with his jealousy and realized that perhaps he minded Benny a lot more than any other person he felt attracted to. So, he had to get rid of this package; he couldn’t give Andrea a chance.

             “Why are we sending it back?” Benny was still confused even though the answer was rather obvious. He didn’t see that accepting the gift would do more harm than good. “We don’t even know what it is.”

            “Benny, if you accept the gift you are giving her a chance.” Balthazar explained with a tired sigh. He really didn’t see why others didn’t understand the whole concept of gifts and what you say to others when you receive them out of the context of a birthday or holiday. “She’ll feel like she is owed something. People tend to think if they give something they must receive. You are done with her, correct?”

            “Yeah.”

             “Then send it back.”Even Ruby looked confused when Balthazar told Benny that. He didn’t think he’d have to explain the logic in it but it was apparent neither one understood. This is why some people got angry at others for not accepting their affections after they gave them things and paid for things. It was why Balthazar had to stop being friends with a few people because they never gave things with altruistic intentions. In a way, no one ever did. Everyone wanted something in return for what they give be it a gift, money, a good feeling of accomplishment, attention, acknowledgement, a favor or love. No one gave things for free; everything had a price tag. “Never accept gifts from anyone unless you wish to owe them something in the future. If a friend offers you something, make sure you understand the conditions so you aren’t tangled into something you don’t want.”

            “Oh. Makes sense.” The good thing was how agreeable Benny was to anything Balthazar said. He took his advice with little question; so obedient. “I changed my phone.”

             “Oh, well, that’s great.” Balthazar tried avoiding looking him in the eye. If he did, he would remember the embarrassing display he put on that night. Instead, he looked towards the counter where he found Castiel sighing sadly.

             “You alright, Balth?”

           “Perfectly fine.” Balthazar wondered what would make his cousin look so sad. What? No, more like who. “What’s wrong with Castiel.”

          “He just came in like that.”

           There was only one person that had made Castiel show so much emotions and that was Dean. He was the only person that could make Castiel happy but also, the only person that could make him so sad. What was it this time? Balthazar was sick of the games those two played. It was a simple enough equation; they both loved each other so it made sense for them to be together. So, why weren’t they together already? What was Dean thinking?

           Balthazar cautiously walked over to Castiel and observed him. He looked sadder than he had when Dean had gone on vacation. This was different; very different. He walked behind the counter and watched his cousin continue to sigh and just stand there looking hopeless. Benny went to work behind him but for the first time since he worked there, Balthazar didn’t even notice him. All he could see was his cousin’s misery. This couldn’t continue.

              “This is horrible, Benny.” Balthazar moved into the kitchen and spoke to Benny. The man just shook his head and looked away but Balthazar was serious. He was really worried and couldn’t have Benny just dismiss it like that. Grabbing his suspenders, Balthazar got his attention again. “My ship is sinking like the Titanic and I hated that god awful movie. And that Celine Dion song. Ugh. That was just atrocious.”

             “Calm down, Balth.” Benny responded nervously. “I'm sure your ship won't sink.”

            “We have to do something that will get those two to just get together already. My heart can't take this.”

            “I'm fresh out of ideas, man.” Benny shrugged. “Besides, I know little about helping ships. I'm more of a pirate. My specialty is sinking them.”

            “Don't be a homewrecker.” Balthazar couldn’t believe what he heard. A pirate? Who got their kicks breaking people apart? It was strange since Benny seemed like a nice guy. Balthazar’s eyes narrowed as he tried to search into Benny’s icy eyes for some answers. “Get to work. We can figure this out later.”

             Balthazar didn’t know why he continued to stare into Benny’s eyes. He could get lost in those gorgeous things but he soon realized they were too close. Looking down at his hands, he realized he never let go of Benny’s suspenders. He was holding him close and he was sure this was definitely sexual harassment. Quickly letting go of them, he could feel his face heat up. He heard Benny sigh and clear his throat behind him.

            “Uh, Balth.”

            “I have a plan.” Balthazar said quickly trying to ignore what had just happened. He smiled devilishly. “It starts now.”

            He wasn’t lying. He did have a plan but he hadn’t thought it completely through. He just called Dean as fast as possible and tried to see if he could get him to show up somewhere. Maybe if he could get him and Castiel to meet it would be alright. He had to think quickly though and ended up pretending his heart was broken somehow. Dean always wanted to help others, he wouldn’t be able to resist.

            The problem was getting Castiel to go home. He got stalled by some asian kid that was definitely talking more about himself than Castiel. It was frustrating but he was able to get the kid moving. He didn’t even know why he was at the cafe, he wasn’t drinking anything. That’s when he saw a blonde woman hurry in looking around suspiciously. The teen waved at her but she grabbed his hand and pulled him into a booth. Balthazar was horrified; what was that situation? Was that the older person that the kid was talking about? Maybe he should send Benny over to take their order because there was no way he was going to deal with that type of creepiness. Before he could tell Benny to go over there, Benny showed up behind him making him jump a bit as he turned to call for him. Who just stands behind someone without a word like that? Was he learning more than just how to work in a cafe from Castiel?

           “Balth, I know you don’t like feeling like you owe anything but I swear I don’t expect anything.”

           “What?” Balthazar’s mind was still on the really odd couple that hid in a booth not whatever Benny was talking about. He didn’t even see how any of this was relevant.

           “I, uh, thought about what you said last night.”

            “Oh, please.” Balthazar groaned immediately feeling the embarrassment return. “Forget all that.”

            “I got something for you.” Benny said hurriedly and immediately turned back towards the kitchen. “Wait here.”

           Benny got him a gift? BENNY GOT HIM A GIFT? Balthazar always had a strict rule about gifts; he never accepted them. He didn’t want to lead anyone on when it came to feelings. He made it clear to all his partners that love was never going to be on the table. So, things like gifts had to prohibited because humans had a horrible habit of thinking if they give a lot they should also receive. It was too troublesome. Balthazar would have to reject this gift but it couldn’t hurt to take a look at it.

           While he was busy wondering what Benny had gotten him, the entrance bell sounded meaning another customer had come. He couldn’t just lean against the counter and daydream about what sort of gift Benny was getting him. He had customers to attend. Quickly, he grabbed an apron and placed it on. Since Castiel was sent home, he would have to stay and help Benny tend the cafe. Walking back to the register, he realized it wasn’t a customer at all.

            “Inias.”

            “Hello, Balthazar.” Inias smiled happily when he saw him. It was that sort of smile that lit up their eyes with all that admiration that Balthazar wished he couldn’t see. “I was wondering when we could schedule a time for our next date.”

            “Last date.”

           “Who knows?” It was amazing how optimistic Inias remained no matter how Balthazar treated him. Why did he cling so much to him? He had done nothing to deserve Inias’s love and he wondered why a young, bright and handsome man would be so interested in someone like him.

           “I know.” Balthazar sighed. It didn’t matter how wonderful Inias was, he just wasn’t interested in him in a romantic sense.  “I thought I’ve been rather clear about the whole matter.”

            “Balth.” Benny’s voice took him away from Inias as he turned to see the man holding something in his hand. It was small enough to fit in his hand and not be able to see what it was. “Here it is.”

           “What is it?” Balthazar watched as Benny opened his hand revealing a strange key chain. The key chain had a weird, thick red string that was looped around itself in some sort of knotted fashion or crosshatching. It looked like nothing Balthazar had ever seen in his life.

            “It’s a Chinese, good luck charm.” Benny explained holding it up. It didn’t look spectacular and he was sure it looked like an arts and craft project gone wrong. “It’s to bring you luck in every aspect of your life or so the lady said. I thought maybe it would help you with the whole not ugh-”

             “Don’t even mention it.” Balthazar quickly said, his cheeks heating up. He didn’t need to be reminded of his silly words that night. He couldn’t believe he would say them to Benny of all people.

            “I thought it would bring you luck in that department.” It was an actual gift that held very little weight. Benny was giving him luck in his life in the only way he could think of. This luck didn’t guarantee that Benny would be recipient of any of the joy Balthazar found. Could he just honestly hope for him to live a good life or was there more to this? Benny said he didn’t expect anything but what if he did? Balthazar wondered if Benny would be looking for gifts as well. He didn’t seem like the sort of person to want to be gifted a lot. His apartment was barren of anything besides the necessities. Sex? Affection? Balthazar would have no trouble repaying the first and the more he thought about it, the less Benny’s possible affection bothered him.

            “It’s so tacky.”

          “But it’s lucky.” Benny’s smile was a little nervous as it seemed he was unsure if Balthazar would accept the little token. After all, he did just hear that whole speech about gifts. Balthazar couldn’t blame him for being worried and he, also, couldn’t think of any reason not to accept the gift. He knew it was against everything he had said before but he took the little keychain off of Benny’s palm.

           “I don’t usually have trivial things mixed with my keys.” He muttered as he fished out his keys from his pocket and latched the item on it.

            “It’s not trivial.” Benny’s smile was more relaxed now and Balthazar could see his eyes light up the moment he hooked the item onto his keyring. The lights in Benny’s eyes didn’t feel as heavy as Inias’. It was actually a joy to see. “It’s lucky.”

             If he had remembered the conversation he was having before Benny returned, he would have remembered Inias behind him. He would have turned and seen the anger in the young man’s eyes and his balled up fists to his side. He would have noticed the jealousy radiating from the man’s form and how the man was only focused on Benny. Benny was the enemy and the only obstacle in Inias’ mind. He was sure he would be able to gain Balthazar’s affections if Benny would just stay away.

            “How about tomorrow night?” Inias asked loudly getting all eyes on him. “We can go to one of your favorite places.”

           “Are you serious?” Balthazar knew Inias was nothing like him when it came to liking parties or clubs. He was a very serious man with goals only into the future. If he hadn’t entered the cafe that day, they probably would have never started their arrangement. They were complete opposites, so, why did he want to go somewhere he would love to go to? Inias would find no enjoyment there.

            “I’m very serious.” Inias said with some strange determination in his eyes. He gave a tight smile to Benny and nodded in his direction. “See you around, Benny.”

            Something wasn’t right and Balthazar could feel it but he didn’t know what was going on. He wasn’t the only one that felt something was off. Benny watched Inias exit the store before saying anything. When Inias was clear out of everyone’s view, he sighed and shook his head.

            “That kid is strange.” He was indeed strange. What was his plan? Balthazar felt a little worried. Something was going to happen and he didn’t know what. This was Inias’ last chance to gain Balthazar’s affections and he seemed so sure. It didn’t bode well.


	9. Rule Number 8: Never Stay

              Balthazar woke up with a splitting headache. Where was he? The brightness of the room made him unable to tell for just a moment. His room; he was in his room. These were his white sheets. That was his ceiling. His body ached as he straightened up in bed. What happened last night?

              He heard the flush of a toilet from downstairs and he sighed. He must have brought someone back home from last night. Last night was his date with Inias, they went to his favorite club. Could it be Inias down there? He didn’t have a shirt or pants on but for some reason still had his underpants on. Did he pass out before the good part?

            Slowly, Balthazar lifted himself from the bed and peered off his loft. The door was opening and he might as well see who he decided to take home with him. Sometimes he was disappointed with his chosen partner, alcohol did change anyone’s appearance after enough of it. The door swung open and out came Benny?

             What was Benny doing coming out of his bathroom? What had he done? How did Benny even get there? Was he at the club? But it was a gay club and definitely not Benny’s style? Balthazar sat down on his bed. What happened last night?

             Yesterday started as normal as any other day. He woke up, got ready for work and arrived at the bookstore at the same time he did any other morning. The only difference that day was that he had a guest that he hadn’t seen in a long time.

             When his aunt divorced his uncle, it was a horrible time for the entire family. Uncle Bartholomew’s parents were cruel and wanted neither him nor his children around his aunt’s family. It wasn’t fair because those boys were rightfully her children. They deserved to see their mother. This rule of course, also, stopped him from being able to visit his cousins except for Castiel.

             It was Michael, who first contacted him when he was still in Britain. They exchanged letters but Balthazar had to use a pseudonym in order to keep everything quiet. There weren’t many letters and despite changing technology, he never really got close to his cousins again. When he moved to the States, he contacted Gabriel through email. Gabriel was helpful and gave him the contact information of all his other cousins (explaining their more useful qualities); he, also, suggested Balthazar live in this particular city instead of elsewhere in the States. Even though he talked to Gabriel the most, he could never say his relationship with him was as strong as with Castiel. There was too much time that separated them that made them behave more like mere acquaintances rather than family.

             So, when he saw a blonde man standing in his shop, seemingly waiting for him, he was a little confused. He did not recognize the man at all but he seemed like someone who took things as easy as him. The man wasn’t dressed nearly as flashy but he definitely had a devil may care attitude towards his suit. Most of the buttons on the top were unbuttoned, there was no tie, no jacket but a very nice vest that hugged the man’s curves. He wasn’t a bad looking man but he was definitely not his type. He was too old and he didn’t like that whole business persona he seemed to have. Then again, those eyes did seem to remind him a little of Benny’s. They were like a cross between Castiel’s and Benny’s and Balthazar didn’t mind looking in them more. He, also, had some nice hips for an old guy. What was he thinking? He was old too! Didn’t change his preference, though.

           “There you are cousin.” Cousin? COUSIN? Balthazar could feel the color draining from his face. He just checked out his cousin and was weighing his options in regards to sleeping with him. Obviously, he wasn’t going to because the man was clearly not his type but the fact he even thought about it.  He was going to hell. This was obviously punishment for playing around too much. “I have the information you wanted.” The man held up a manila envelope with a small smile.

            “Lucifer.” How fitting that Lucifer be the one to send him to hell. Quickly, he snatched the rather thick envelope and looked around. Benny didn’t work today; that was a relief. Ruby looked between them with an interested expression.

            “You’re named after the devil?” She asked with a small smile.

            “I’m named after the prettiest angel of them all.” Lucifer told her without any hesitation. He even gave her a flirty look. Balthazar rolled his eyes.

            “They should rename you then.” Ruby teased causing Lucifer’s flirty smile to drop instantly. There it was. Ruby was far too focus to bother with the likes of his cousin. She had school and her dreams to think about. She wasn’t one that was going to fall for a flirty glance, especially from someone old enough to be her dad.

           “What is that?” Lucifer looked over at Ruby’s energy drink. What indeed. Balthazar had no idea what was in those cans. He only knew it was some sort of energy drink and Ruby was obsessed with it.

           “Demon blood.” She grabbed the can and thrust it toward his cousin. “Want some, devil?”

           Lucifer was a braver man than Balthazar ever would be. Without even asking what the drink really was, without even seeing the ingredients, grabbed Ruby’s can from her hand and took a sip. It was an interesting to watch how Lucifer’s face contorted after one sip. Balthazar hadn’t realized faces could do that.

            “Oh no. What did I just put in my mouth?” Lucifer thrust the can back to Ruby, who just shrugged in response. “That was absolutely ghastly.”

            “I like it.” She even took a huge gulp from the same can Lucifer had wished never was brought to him. Both men stared at her in disbelief. How could she even like that stuff?

           “Ruby has particular tastes.” Balthazar reasoned after a moment of quiet. His cousin shook his head as he smacked his tongue against the roof of his mouth in an effort to kill the taste.

           “I must leave and get the disgusting taste out of my mouth.” Lucifer stuck his tongue out as Ruby seemed to not even care about his pain. She went back to listening to her music and pretending to work. Lucifer turned to Balthazar and pointed at the manila envelope. “Before I go though, I must say those two have interesting backgrounds. Even I should warn you about getting too close. People like that will only bring you down with them and I don’t want to see you get in to trouble.”

           People like that? What did he mean? Certainly, he wasn’t talking about Benny, was he? The man seemed completely harmless. He could believe Andrea had an interesting past but there was no way Benny had been anything but a teddy bear, right? He didn’t want to think about it. He’d look into the envelope during his own time.

           “Wash that taste out of your mouth and we’ll talk later.” He sent Lucifer on his way with a sigh. He was really curious what was in the envelope but was it something he really wanted to see? Would this change how he felt about Benny? He was suddenly feeling guilty for asking about so much information but he needed to know. Staring at the envelope, Balthazar decided the information could wait. He would put it in his desk for safe keeping until he was ready because now he wasn’t so sure. He was truly frightened of what he might see but then again, it could just be Andrea. She was pretty crazy so she probably did some crazy things. Benny could have been innocent. But then again, Lucifer said both. Maybe some things were better left unknown.

           He had had other things to worry about like the date with Inias. This would be their last one and Inias was so sure he could bring him to one of his usual spots and somehow prove something. Balthazar was sure there was nothing to prove. Inias would probably get jealous of the attention he got at the club and he was pretty sure it wouldn’t go in his favor. Didn’t the young man understand that this wasn’t going to be anything? He just wasn’t going to change his lifestyle for him and there was no way a trip to one of his favorite clubs was going to make him love him.

           He remembered getting ready for his date. He always did his best to take them seriously. He didn't want Inias to think he wasn't trying; he really was. He just couldn't see the kid in that way. Maybe it was because of their age gap; the one thing that attracted him to Inias was the one thing that made them not work. It was a little funny when he thought about it.

           Inias picked him up like he always did on these dates. The man couldn't wrap the idea around his head that Balthazar was in no need of assistance to get places. He could very well drive his own car or walk if he needed to. There was no reason to treat him like he was older than he really was. However, Balthazar said not a word about it. Once they got into the club, Inias would surely change his mind immediately. He would see they were from two very different worlds and just didn't work well together.

           “Are you sure about this, Inias.” He had asked when they approached the building. Inias could turn around now if he wanted and take him to one of those boring dates of his. This was his chance to change his mind.

           “I’m fine with whatever you do, Balth.” Inias told him with a small smile. Anything? Even if that was flirting with other men? Balthazar didn't believe someone like Inias would be able to handle that. “As long as you come home to me, who cares?”

           “How long do you think you can last with that mentality?” Balthazar questioned him slightly shaking his head in disbelief. Inias was stubborn; he'd give him that.

           “I’ll prove it to you.” Inias nodded confidently. “No matter what you do, I can handle it.”

           “You won’t get jealous?” Balthazar didn't believe that. There was no way he'd be able to handle it.

            “Of course not.” Inias seemed sure of himself but he was sure he was just pretending. He supposed he was trying to show Balthazar that being with him wouldn't hold him down. It didn't matter how liberal or laid back the person was in the beginning, sooner or later they always wanted to monopolize him. Humans were very lonely creatures and craved some sort of connection. Even Balthazar had come to terms with his own loneliness but Inias wasn't the connection he craved.

            They walked into the club and was greeted by dim lights with roaming colored spotlights and a sea of bodies gyrating to the music. The place was loud and there were couples of all sorts all over each other in many different areas. Probably a few hooking up in the bathroom stalls as well. Even he had a few nice memories in that area. This was nothing Inias was used to and he could see the man paling slightly.

            “I’ll be designated driver.” Inias tried shouting over the music. Still so stubborn. Fine. He'll drink to his heart's content then and really show Inias what he was about.

            “Then I won’t hold back.”

             He remembered he only had meant to drink a few beers. He had only thought of being a little tipsy and flirting with some other guys but Inias didn't seem bothered. In fact, he encouraged Balthazar to drink more. Inias wasn't the type to take advantage of drunk people and he certainly didn't need to get him drunk to sleep with him; he just had to ask. Just because Balthazar didn't love him didn't mean he wouldn't have one last night with him. So, he drank more. He didn't know why he decided to drink much more than he usually did but part of him had hoped it would scare Inias off; it didn't.

           There was a gorgeous, young man sat a little ways from them at the bar. After enough drinks, anyone would look gorgeous but Balthazar was certain this one was definitely something. He stumbled to get to him and Inias had to help him up a bit but he got to the young man. Balthazar remembered feeling something touch his side but he didn't think Inias was putting his hands in his pockets or anything. Probably trying to touch him more than help him up.

            “He’s a little old don’t you think?” He remembered the man's female friend saying. He remembered feeling insulted by her comment to the point he stood up and spoke rather loudly.

            “Old? I'm not that old.” He reached for his shirt and threw it off his body. “See?”

           “Balthazar always takes care of that body.” One of the waitresses had said. He was pretty sure it was Nicole, who always had it out for him for some reason. “Got to look good if you are going to be a slut.”

           “And you aren't?” The bartender had laughed making Nicole stomp away. If the bartender or Nicole had cared they would have saved him from himself. However, no one actually stopped him; not even Inias.

            “Want to come over to my place and party?” The younger stranger had asked and Balthazar was thrilled to already pick up someone so quickly. Maybe he wasn't getting bad at this anymore or maybe the gorgeous young man wasn't really that great looking and was willing to take anyone. He didn't know. He was too wasted to recall why the man wanted his company. He just knew he did and he knew he hadn't wanted to wait.

             “Why go there when we have right here?” He remember kissing the man forcefully and the feel of hands over his exposed back. He, also, recalled there were flashes of light for some reason. He remember hearing the female friend of the young man speaking.

           “Wow, he really is a slut.” She had said with a laugh and he wasn't sure if it was out of humor or cruelty. “I’m sorry. We didn’t mean to steal your friend from you.”

            “It doesn’t matter.” Inias had said that. He remembered that. Why did Inias say that? Was he that determined to show that he wasn't affected by this? Why didn't he stop him? He couldn't remember much else past that except that as he was enjoying himself it all just abruptly stopped. The young man had him pinned against the bar at one point and he could hear the nervous laughter of the bartender. There were more flashes and suddenly, the man was pulled off him.

            “Get off him.” He remembered hearing that familiar southern accent but he was probably way too drunk and was just hearing things.

            “Didn’t know he had a boyfriend.” He remembered the man saying but it only made the bartender laugh loudly.

             “Come on, guys.” He shook his head in disbelief. “It’s Balthazar. The whore doesn’t have boyfriends.”

            “What did you call him?” His savior growled. Looking up, Balthazar must have been hallucinating because he could see Benny above him glaring at the bartender. How did he get here? When did he get there? He couldn’t see why Benny would come to a club like this; it wasn’t his style. The man didn’t even have a television in his house and always dressed like he was from another century. Perhaps he was dreaming then but Balthazar clearly remembered seeing that handsome face tensely staring at the bartender.

            “Please, everyone here knows what a slut he is.” The bartender had said and Balthazar remembered seeing Benny close his fist tightly at his side. He reached out to touch it just to see if he was really there.

             “Benny?” It was him. He was there. But why? Where was Inias? What was going on?

             “I’m taking you home.” Benny told him grabbing his phone from the counter. He remember being shown the phone while Benny used his other arm to hold him up. Why wasn’t his phone in his pocket where it belonged? Balthazar didn’t remember taking it out but then again, the details were hazy.“This yours?”

            “Benny, leave me alone.” Balthazar had whined like a child and pushed against his chest to be free. Benny was too strong though. He was able to hold him close without any problem even when Balthazar was pushing against him. Perhaps, it was because he was drunk and wasn’t at his best but for some reason Benny was like an immovable  wall.

            “No can do.” He dragged Balthazar out of the club and towards a strange station wagon. Was it a station wagon or was it a camper? Balthazar couldn’t remember. It had to be a station wagon because why would Benny even have a camper when he lived in an apartment?

            “I want to have sex.” Balthazar had whined as Benny buckled him in the passenger seat.

            “You’re drunk.”

            “I don’t care.” He couldn’t remember what he was doing at the time. All he remembered was that his seat belt was fastened and he found himself unable to be free of it. “It’s happened before.”

            “It shouldn’t.” Benny told him closing the door and entering through the driver’s door.

            “I’ve had a menage a- What’s the French word for twelve?”

            “TWELVE?” He remembered how shocked Benny sounded. The memory brought a bright blush to his face. How could he have said that? It was true but why did he tell Benny? Unfortunately, it wasn’t the most embarrassing thing he said that night.

            “It was great.”

            “Balth, come on.” Benny had told him as he begun to drive him home. “Rest up a bit.”

            “Why are you ruining my fun?” Balthazar remembered he sounded like a whiny child and had even shook his body like a five year old with a temper tantrum. Benny asked him where he lived. Balthazar remembered that because he, also, recalled him saying that Benny should just take him to his place. It took a while but he ended up saying where he lived and told Benny he could come for a cup of coffee. He wasn’t sure if Benny knew what he was referring to but decided that it didn’t matter. What he had said next would have made his intentions quite clear.

             Benny had drove up to his building and tried getting him onto his feet. It was hard because at this point, Balthazar was so far gone his legs wobbled like jello. Just a few steps and he quickly slunk down to the ground with a chuckle. Everything was humorous to him at that point. With a heavy sigh, Benny looked down at his boss.

            “Balth, you’re really drunk.”

            “And you’re so sexy.” He remembered saying in a giddy way that just caused Balthazar to groan in shame when he thought of it.

            “Thank you.” Surprisingly, Benny didn’t freak out. He didn’t even care what was being said. He just brushed off anything Balthazar was saying and perhaps that was a good thing. Balthazar didn’t remember what sort of face Benny had when he said all those things. It was all a bit fuzzy. He did remember Benny picking him up and placing him on his back. “And up we go.”

              “So strong.” Balthazar had pressed his chest firmly against Benny’s back and had started caressing the arms holding him up. “I love your arms.”

              “Thanks but I’m trying to get you home.”Benny grunted as he carried Balthazar up the stairs. He could have taken the elevator but Balthazar couldn’t remember the exact details. He just knew it felt wonderful being carried by him and it ended way too soon. He was placed next to his door as Benny bent down to search his persons. “Give me your keys.”

             “You already have the keys.” Balthazar chuckled and pointed to his chest. “To my heart.”

             “You are really wasted, Balth.”

            “I’m fine.” Balthazar was far from fine and for the first time, he realized he wasn’t at the club anymore. He looked around and couldn’t recognize his own front door.“I’m- Where am I?”

            “Alright, I’ll get the keys myself.”Benny had put his hands in Balthazar’s pockets and stupidly, he had thought Benny wanted to get into his pants in quite a different way.

           “That’s not how you remove my trousers.” Balthazar chuckled but now that he thought about it, it was more of a giggle. He reached down and undid his belt. “Here let me help.”

            “No. Keep those on.” Benny told him but he didn’t listen. He began pulling down his pants while Benny desperately tried to pull them back up.

            “I want to help!” He whined throwing Benny off guard and successfully tossing his pants on the hallway.

           “I got them alright.” Somewhere Benny retrieved his pants and got his keys in the process. He didn’t remember how and soon he was up on his back again; this time only in his underwear. “Geez, you get drunk and begin acting like a child.”

            “I’m not a child.”

            “Yeah, I know.” Benny carried him up to his bed and just dropped him on it. He must have placed his phone on his side table and pants in the corner since Balthazar could see them clearly in his room. But before Benny could leave a very drunk Balthazar alone in the bed, he had been kind enough to tuck him in. Doing so, however, resulted in Balthazar grabbing his arm and saying the most embarrassing and shocking thing he had said all that night.

            “Stay with me.” He had pleaded sounding so desperate and so sad. Benny froze in place and Balthazar didn’t see the look in his eyes nor how his shoulders had slumped a bit. “Please.” He remembered begging like the clingy people he had always dropped. Pleading for someone to take away his loneliness even if it was just for that night. “Don’t go.”

            There was nothing after that. His last memory was Benny holding his hand and agreeing to stay. Perhaps he passed out after that but one thing was clear; there was no way he could face Benny now. He heard footsteps going up the stairs. How could he even look at him the same way after everything he had done? How did Benny even handle him in such a ridiculous state?

           Quickly, he jumped back into his bed and covered himself up. Hiding under the covers like that was very juvenile but he had no other choice. He definitely drunkenly confessed his attraction to Benny and that was a huge mistake. Benny was straight and was probably terrified of his advances. How could he have done something so stupid?

             “I know you’re up, Balth.” Benny chuckled and tried tugging on the covers but Balthazar held them over his head tightly. “Quit hiding. I got you something for that hangover you definitely have.”

             “Please ignore everything I said that night.” Balthazar whimpered.

              “No worries. I knew you were wasted.” Benny assured him. Balthazar felt a dip on the bed and assumed he was now sitting beside him. “Besides, I was flattered by your compliments. I guess I look pretty good when you got enough booze in your system.”

 _Oh, no “booze” was necessary trust me._ Balthazar thought as he refused to exit the safety of the covers. Part of him was disappointed that Benny thought it was only because he was wearing beer goggles that he thought the southern man was attractive. No matter what Balthazar drank may it be beer or tea, Benny always looked downright gorgeous and he should never think otherwise. The other part of Balthazar, however, was glad Benny didn’t take his words seriously; it would have been too awkward.

             “I’d check that phone of yours, Balth.” Benny told him causing him to look out from the covers cautiously.

             “Why?”

            “Because last night, someone texted me some rather interesting photos of you and told me where you were.” Someone did what? Balthazar was shocked. Who would do such a thing? Did they send it to everyone he knew? EVEN HIS MOTHER? Quickly, Balthazar grabbed his phone and checked his messages. No, they were only sent to Benny along with where they were. Why? Who would have done this?

             Then it hit him. When he stumbled in the beginning,  he was helped up. He remembered feeling like someone was touching his side and possibly putting their hands in his pockets. Someone took his phone. The flashes of light! Those were someone taking pictures of him and he knew exactly who had done it: Inias.


	10. Rule Number 9: This is not Permanent

              “You look like shit.” He felt like shit but Charlie’s observation was more than likely spot on. He may have had his hangover yesterday morning but he still felt like it had been this morning instead. He didn’t have the splitting headache as he did the morning before, but he still felt completely awful. It was like the hangover was so great it persisted to the next day.

             “Thank you for your delicate observation.”  Balthazar muttered in an annoyed tone but despite his tone, Charlie just smiled happily.

             “Anytime.”

             There should be a law about working this early but Benny was running late for some reason. Ruby didn’t explicitly say why Benny couldn’t show up yet but she did have an amused tone. It had to be something that made her happy and Ruby was a morbid woman, Benny could be in trouble. However, he couldn’t just race off and find him because he was the owner of this store; he had responsibilities. Ridiculous responsibilities. Also, he remembered the embarrassing display he put on before him and just couldn’t bring himself to face him. He had made a fool of himself in front of him too many times.

             He wasn’t looking forward to when Benny came to work eventually. He didn’t know what to say. That morning, when Benny had stayed to make sure he was alright, Balthazar could barely face him without turning completely red. He couldn’t believe the pictures he saw on his phone. What was Inias thinking? He ruined everything! Balthazar wasn’t sure what exactly was ruined but he definitely knew that night was a disaster; he was a disaster. He was glad Benny had things to do that morning because it was so awkward being around him now.

             “You know,”Charlie was wiping down the counter when she spoke up. “Benny asked me a lot of interesting questions.”

             “Please, don’t mention him to me right now.” Balthazar didn’t want to hear about him while he still remembered all those embarrassing things. He didn’t want to even think about how Benny was going to look at him. When he woke up and found him at his apartment, he was confused. He was horrified when he remembered begging him to stay and Benny had looked at him with concern. Concern! Probably for his sanity. He didn’t need to see that look again.

             “Why not?” Charlie was oblivious to Balthazar’s fears. He was sure everyone was if Benny kept his side of the bargain and spoke to no one about it. “Aren’t you crazy about him?”

             “What makes you think that?” Balthazar was pretty sure he wasn’t that obvious about it. Then again, Sam and Jess had caught on as well as Dean. Perhaps everyone knew including Benny and they were all having a good old laugh at his expense. No, Benny wouldn’t do that and neither would his friends. Also, if Benny knew he was attracted to him, he didn’t seem to care that much about it or just ignored it.

             “Maybe it’s the way you blush whenever he compliments you or how the moment you see him those eyes always zero in on his butt.”

             “I don’t always zero in on his butt.” Balthazar told her sounding insulted. “Sometimes, he’s facing me.”

            Charlie laughed once she heard that. She nodded as if he had done a job well done and just slapped him on the back. Balthazar allowed himself to smile back a little proud of his quick thinking. It seemed Charlie had forgotten the previous question because of it. It was better that way; he didn’t want to get his hopes up because Benny might have asked a question out of pure curiosity. He guessed it would be a question that would bring him hope, because of how excited Charlie had looked.

             He went back to his business trying to ignore his curiosity. Nothing good would come from false hope. So, maybe Benny asked about him in some way. Maybe he asked about Balthazar being single or maybe something equally hope bringing. Normal people would inquire about the relationships of others if they were merely curious. Of course, Benny would be curious since he saw the whole thing with Inias and his embarrassing moments. Maybe he was asking about Balthazar in general and that wasn’t much different than normal employee curiosity. Charlie seemed excited so it had to be something very interesting or personal.

             “Don’t you want to know what questions he had?” Charlie asked when she notice his contemplative look.

             “I’m better off not knowing.” Balthazar waved his hand in the air and tried to walk into the back office away from her but she followed.

             “You sure?” Why did she have to be so persistent in this? It didn’t affect her in anyway. He stopped walking, turning around to face her.

             “Look, he’s my employee.”

             “A very hot employee.” Charlie wiggled her eyebrows causing Balthazar to become speechless. It was very rare for him to not know how to comment back. He was usually a library of comebacks and sass. He was known for his sass! However, he couldn’t deny that she was right. Benny was a delicious specimen. However, coming from Charlie, it was a shock to hear and he found himself blurting out the first thing he could think.

              “You’re a lesbian.”

             “Doesn’t mean I can’t say a man’s hot.” Charlie looked slightly offended. “You of all people should know that.”

             “Not really, I’m not adverse to sleeping with women, I just don’t tend to want to. In fact, I don’t care about any gender really.” Balthazar knew what label most would give him; he was a pan sexual that perfered men most of the time. There was actually very little holding him over the pansexual line. If it wasn’t for a few very interesting ladies and that one intersex person he met at a bar (that was a very fun night), he would have considered himself 100% homosexual. Even now, he still called himself just gay in order to forgo the long explanation.“I’m pretty sure you aren’t the same way with men.”

             “Oh hell no.” Charlie scrunched up her nose and shook her head. “I’m only about the ladies but I can still say a man’s hot; there is no rule against it.”

            “Did you check your lesbian handbook?”

             “Oh, of course.” She nodded as if such an item truly exists. “I found no clause. What about you and your little handbook of whatever you are?”

             “I’m sure if there was one it would tell me to forget Benny.”

             “Why?” She looked up at him curiously. “You guys would be cute together besides you like him.”

             "He’s still my employee and he’s painfully straight.”

             “Painfully straight?” Charlie chuckled a little at that. Balthazar didn’t see what was so funny; it was pretty obvious he was correct. “You sure about that?”

             “Very sure.”

             “Maybe your gaydar is broken.”

             “No, it is completely functional.” Balthazar didn’t sense anything from Benny. He was a guy, who seemed a bit uncomfortable with the idea that Balthazar wasn’t straight. Sure, he said it didn’t matter but people don’t ask about it without it mattering a little bit. Especially, when they knew the answer from the evidence presented in front of them. They had to be bothered by that fact in someway. Also, Benny only ever mentioned women when he spoke of dating and there was Andrea. It didn’t help he came from the bible belt and spoke with that delicious accent. Folks down there didn’t really seem like the most progressive of people. These were all hints that he was nothing but straight.

             “Okay then.” Charlie didn’t seem convinced and was eying him suspiciously. Balthazar shook his head in annoyance.

             “Charlie.” He sighed and pointed towards the dining area which had yet to be set up. “Get to work.”

            He begun baking the muffins and sorting out the display area in peace. Charlie was making sure there were plenty of sugar and cream at each table. Some people enjoyed putting it in themselves. She wiped down the tables one last time and made sure the counter was cleared of any junk. Lids were stocked up for those who take cups to go. The paper cups were also stocked up as well as the ceramic ones. Charlie made sure there were plenty of dishes in the front near the machines, so that she could easily grab them.

             It was always busy in the morning and their customers weren’t the most pleasant of people. It was silly to think serving coffee to people was an easy job. Most of the time they were on the receiving end of someone’s bad morning. There were a lot of people who were grumpy before they had their morning drink. Balthazar didn’t really care much for those people and though he was running a business, his people came first. So, he might have sassed more than one customer and perhaps, he had been yelled profanities at and been told that they would never come back. If they had that attitude, he didn’t care if they did. He would only allow so much malice to be thrown at his employees.

             Most of the time they were just in bad moods and answered quite short when asked questions. They treated them like they were stupid and Balthazar just killed them with kindness as did Charlie. Castiel was a special person who never understood they were sounding so rude. It was for the best, he supposed. It was tough working at a cafe but there were a lot of moments that made it worth it. The main point was to not let customers affect your mood. Think them all as background noise and not give their words or harsh tones any meaning. They aren’t angry with you, they probably are not satisfied with anything in life. They are to be pitied really.

              Humans were so weak when it came to emotions. They let it control how they reacted and treated people. Balthazar hated strong emotions and muted them. Over years, he learned to control himself no matter what kind of emotion he was experiencing. To have his logic screwed up by emotions was a horrifying thought. He saw how it affected his aunt and almost ruin her life. He saw customers toss their emotions around and harm his employees with cruel words and rude tones. It was one of the reasons he found it hard to hire anyone new in the cafe. He wasn’t going to be like that. That is why when Inias walked in he calmly spoke instead of yelled.

               “You have a lot of guts coming in here after what you did.” Of course, he wasn’t going to be nice. Controlled emotions or not what Inias did was outrageous and the man did display a lot of courage by coming over mere days after the fact. He supposed if he was a lesser person he would yell at him and kick him out but he tried to remain calm.

               “That’s what I want to talk to you about.” Inias shifted on his feet nervously. “I’m sorry.”

              “That’s it?” Balthazar was expecting more than just an apology. What Inias did was different from bumping into someone or doing something by accident. What he did was calculated and cruelly executed. A sorry wasn’t enough.

              “I really don’t care about who you are with.” Was that supposed to be an excuse or what? Inias did seem desperate to let him know that fact and even more so to let Balthazar know the next thing he said. “But does Benny? He was about to beat up the man you were busy kissing.”

               “You let me get drunk and didn’t stop me from making a fool out of myself.” This wasn’t about how Benny behaved that night. Benny wasn’t going to allow him to possibly make a huge mistake. It’s true that he slept around but he was always careful about it. If he was too inebriated, he wouldn’t make sure they were both clean or take the proper precautions. Balthazar was all for a good time but he wasn’t ready to have an STD. It was dangerous running off with someone when you had little inhibitions. Inias was willing to allow this to happen. His whole life could have been ruined and even if it hadn’t, Balthazar hated waking up in a strange place realizing he had lost control. He had made the mistake before but he tried not to when he could. The real problem was that he trusted Inias. He trusted that he would make sure he didn’t get hurt. He actually thought the man cared enough for that to be true. “Instead, you took photos.”

             “I know.” Inias looked down ashamed as he should be. Folding his arms over his chest, Balthazar peered down at him curiously as he the young man was thinking of an excuse. “I just wanted him to see.”

             “See what?”

             “You at your worse.”

             “My worse?” What kind of an excuse was that? Why would Inias even think of something like that? Was he trying to rule Benny out of the competition? There wasn’t even a competition since Benny was straight. There was no need to put on such a show; Balthazar wouldn’t be with Benny regardless. It was needless and cruel. Why did Inias think it was a good idea?

             “I know it was wrong.” Inias admitted eyes never leaving the ground. “But can you blame me?”

             “I can.” Jealousy was ugly but it didn’t exonerate anyone. Balthazar knew better than anyone that emotions may make you lose control but it was your choice in the end. It had to be. The thought that emotions could control you completely was frightening and Balthazar had always made sure he was the one in control. If he could do it, anyone could. You can always chose to walk away or do something horrible; there was always a choice. Inias made the wrong choice. “And I do.”

             “I’m sorry.” He did seem like he meant it now. Now that he knew his flimsy excuse wouldn’t help. “I feel really bad about what I did and I know you probably won’t forgive me.”

             “No, no one really got hurt.” Balthazar sighed heavily and looked away. He was upset. He wasn’t very upset but he was still bothered by the lack of caring Inias had shown him. He knew that he had no feelings for the man but this was a guy that said he loved him. It was actually quite fortunate that he never started to feel anything for him. If he had, he probably would have actually been hurt by his lack of caring rather than just slightly bothered by it. “It could have been worse.”

             “You forgive me?” Forgiveness. It was something Balthazar had been thinking about. Initially, he was furious but as the day dragged yesterday, he found himself becoming less and less so. Inias was young and stupid. He should learn from this incident but it wasn’t his problem what happened to him later. Balthazar shouldn’t dwell too much on it either since it wouldn’t do any use bothering about it now; it was in the past and you can’t change the past. It would be best to let go of this incident and cut all ties. If he held a grudge then Inias would always be around somewhere in his mind. He wasn’t interested in giving someone he had no plans to become attached to or love any occupation in his mind. He didn’t hate Inias but he didn’t feel strongly for him in any sense. He didn’t even pity him anymore. It was over.

             “Let me make this clear.” Balthazar told him dropping his hands to his side. “I am forgiving you for me not for you. I don’t want this ending on a sour note and I don’t need to harbor ill will, it isn’t my style.” Inias nodded with a small smile. Balthazar hoped the kid wasn’t thinking he had a chance. There were zero chances here. He would find it best to move on. With a sigh, Balthazar continued. “Let’s make it, also, abundantly clear that what you did was beyond wrong no matter what you were trying to accomplish and even though I’m forgiving you, I’m not forgetting it.”

              "I didn’t think you would.” The young man nodded and it seemed he understood everything was over. Perhaps he’d come back but Balthazar was sure he knew he ruined his chances. “I’ll talk to you later.”

             Balthazar wasn’t sure if there would be a later even in Inias’s mind. It was over and he could see it clear on the young man’s face that he saw that too. In the end, nothing was permanent and it was a rule they set up clear before. There was going to be a time they would part and it was always best to part amicably. Perhaps they would see each other again but as friends and nothing more.

             “What are you doing here?” Balthazar suddenly heard Benny growl when Inias was trying to leave. Benny showed up after whatever he had to handle and looked like he was ready to rip Inias apart. Quickly, he moved in between them and placed his hands on Benny’s arms to hold him back before he launched himself. He couldn’t have any violence in his cafe and Benny should know better than to threaten someone in the open like this. It was fortunate that the one customer that was in the cafe hadn’t even looked up from his newspaper. Unless, he didn’t want to be noticed at all and was feeling rather scared.

             “Benny, calm down.” Balthazar told him pushing against him to hold him back. “We were just talking.”

              “After what he did?” Benny gave him a confused look and still tried to get to Inias. Balthazar shook his head at the younger man in a silent way to get him to leave. It was only when Inias raced out the door and was no where in sight did Benny dropped his arms with a sigh. “Why are you even talking to him?”

              “Because I am a mature adult.”

              “No where does it say you have to converse or pay any attention to someone who’s hurt you to be mature.”

             “Benny, I survived and nothing happened.” Balthazar didn’t know why Benny was so up in arms about it but it was nice to see he cared even if it was a little. He certainly showed much more caring than Inias had and that had to mean something. If not anything else, Benny was a true friend. “Thanks to you.”

             “You gonna see him again?”

             “Our dates are over but I hardly see why that’s any of your business.” Balthazar was sure he would see Inias again some day. He’d show up to the cafe or something but there would probably be no more determination to capture him. He was sure Inias knew now there was never going to be a chance and was moving on. If he wasn’t, he was going to have a bad time with Benny being the way he was. He’d probably get thrown out of the cafe by him. Balthazar could see Benny lifting Inias with ease; those muscles weren’t there just for show.

              “I just worry about ya sometimes.”

             “Well, don’t.” Balthazar didn’t need Benny worrying about him like that; it gave him too much hope. He was perfectly fine with their relationship or lack there of at the moment. He could lust for Benny secretly and the man could remain oblivious of it. He didn’t need to get his hopes up when Benny had no interest in him at all.“I’m perfectly capable of handling myself.” Suddenly, a gleam off of darken glass caught Balthazar’s eye. Looking over, he could see a woman wearing sunglasses looking in the window curiously. Wearing sunglasses during this season was only to look suspicious. After all, nothing made one stand out more than wearing sunglasses when it wasn’t necessary. Also, the fact she tried ducking down when he looked was a dead giveaway that she was up to something. Now that he thought about it, she looked familiar. With a sigh, he turned back to look at Benny gesturing to the window. “Besides, there seems to be some problems on your end.”

            “What is she doing here? I thought I lost her.” Benny turned to look at her and sighed heavily. Balthazar looked at him confused.  Lost her? So, that was the something he had to take care of earlier. “I’ve had just enough of this.”

           Benny walked outside to confront the woman, that was obviously Andrea. It was silly of her to think that just wearing sunglasses would make her unnoticeable and unrecognizable; it was so obviously her. He thought Benny said he had gotten rid of her completely. Apparently, he was wrong about that.

           Charlie noticed the commotion outside; how could she not with all the yelling it seemed Andrea was doing? Benny just nodded and said some things but he looked like he was about to yell as well. Charlie walked to stand by Balthazar’s side. She was ignoring their customers but so was he. The problem outside seemed a bit more important than anything inside.

           Andrea gave Benny a look that was a mix of anger and hurt right before she slapped him across the face. The action came as a shock to both Charlie and Balthazar. They knew she was angry but they didn’t think she would go so far as to strike him. Even Ruby suddenly got interested in what laid beyond her desk. She leaned over the counter and stared out the window in equal shock. Balthazar was more than worried after what he saw. He was sure Benny didn’t deserve that slap or the one that came afterwards.

           “Benny.”He moved forward but a hand grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

           “Don’t get involved.” Wise words came from Charlie.  “Let Benny handle this. Just like you handled Inias.”

           She was right; this wasn’t his place at all and no matter how worried he may be, this didn’t concern him. They were arguing now. Benny made no move to retaliate and though he gave her tense looks, he didn’t seem to be raising his voice. Andrea’s whole face was red and she was pushing against his chest and waving her arms wildly. Benny shook his head a lot in the conversation but kept his arms by his side being the bigger person in the argument.

          “Wow, they are really going at it.” Charlie watched in wonder as Andrea struck Benny again. Why did she keep hitting him? “That’s like the third slap.”

          “I can’t watch this anymore.” Balthazar took a deep breath and walked outside quickly. Charlie said nothing to him and didn’t call for him to return. Obviously, she couldn’t take it either.

         “You can’t do this, Benny.” He heard Andrea whine as he walked out the door. She was shaking with anger and seemed offended that Benny wouldn’t take her back. With that attitude, who would? “After everything I’ve done for you. You still want to sit here and work for that man as what a busboy?”

         “I told you.” Benny sounded tired and just as he suspected, wasn’t raising his voice at all. “I’m not going back no matter how many times you slap me.”

        “You told me you didn’t love me which is a lie.” Andrea growled. “You deserved that slap.”

        “And the other two?” Balthazar questioned as he walked over to the two. He really didn’t see how a slap was supposed to make Benny say otherwise. If he didn’t love her, no slapping was going to suddenly change his mind. Maybe she was hoping to change the chemistry in his brain with those slaps; it was as equally silly as her sunglasses disguise.

           “This is none of your business and trust me, he deserved it.”

           “I think the only one deserving of a slap is you if you lay another hand on him.” Balthazar informed her crossing his arms over his chest.

          “How dare you?” Andrea looked shocked and appalled by what Balthazar had said. It was as if she believed no one would retaliate and she could abuse Benny freely without any consequence.“I’m a lady.”

          “Why does that even matter?” Balthazar really didn’t see what the whole problem was. She was clearly harming another person and she was clearly not going to stop. He would threaten anyone else that did such a thing the same way; she was not special. She was cruel and if Benny cutting ties, changing his number and threatening to get a restraining order meant nothing to her, perhaps threatening would. “I hold no qualms over striking you just like any other individual who deserves it.”

         “Are you for real?” She honestly thought Balthazar was the one in the wrong. She looked at him like he was crazy and that she hadn’t been shoving Benny and smacking him. She even made a fake British accent that was god awful when she spoke again. “Is that what they do in jolly old England.”

         “Why do they always-” Was it amusing to make that ridiculous accent? Why did Americans always mock him like that? He sounded nothing like that. “Just no. Don’t bring my nationality into this.”

          She moved closer to him, puffing out her chest like a bird. She was shorter than him and much skinnier; he wasn’t sure what she was trying to prove. He’ll play her little game. He leaned in closer with a teasing smile which only seem to make her angrier. In the corner of his eye, he could see Benny looking very uncomfortable with the situation.

          “Andrea, stop.” He begged but Andrea didn’t listen to him. That was the problem wasn’t it; Andrea never listened to him.

         “No, he has no right butting into our business.” She stood on her toes in an effort to look more threatening. It was laughable. Balthazar decided to meet her halfway by lowering his head a bit.

         “Please, I’m not frightened of you.” He told her with a smile and perhaps that wasn’t what he should have been doing. Perhaps he shouldn’t be instigating anything or causing her to grow angrier but he couldn’t help it; she irritated him. However, he knew he was only making the situation worse and when she raised her arm against him, he couldn’t really blame her. Benny stopped it from happening though grabbing her wrist firmly to stop her. It was the second time he had stopped a hand from striking him in the face.

        “We have no business.” Benny told her as she ripped her hand from his grasp. “If anything, you are butting in over here. Go back to Louisiana before I call the cops.”

        “You wouldn’t dare.” She looked scared for once. She had been threatened with a restraining order and she didn’t seem as frightened as she did with the idea of police officers coming after her.

         “I should have done this a long time ago.” Benny reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. Before he could dial anything, Andrea nervously spoke trembling slightly.

         “You can’t.” She had said. “You know what they’ll do to me.”

         “Everything you deserve.” Benny shrugged and went back to focusing on his cell phone. Really, calling the cops was actually quite simple; he was stalling for some reason. Balthazar didn’t know why though and what were they talking about?  What they will do to her? Was there a history he didn’t know about? His mind went back to the manila folder Lucifer had given him. It was as thick as a book, things aren’t that thick unless there is a lot of interesting information. Part of him wanted to look but the other part of him reminded him it wasn’t his place.

         “I’ll tell them all about what you’ve done.” Andrea threatened looking desperate with a touch of crazy shining in her eyes. “If I fall, you’re coming with me.”

         “What is this?” Balthazar asked a little confused. Benny taking a fall as well? Benny a law breaker? That couldn’t be right. He was like a big teddy bear, how could he have such a dark past?

          “What I did, I owned up to.” Benny looked like whatever he did, he regretted it deeply. “I already did my time willingly.”

            Benny had been in jail. He had been in jail and done his time. Perhaps, it wasn’t so bad. Maybe it was just a petty crime and he did one or two years in prison. Benny didn’t seem like the type of person to do something too horrible. No, he wasn’t the person to do something horrible. This had to be a mistake.

            “I’m sure there are things you haven’t told them about.” Andrea threatened him. There was more than what he did time for? That couldn’t be right.

            “Whatever you got.” Benny crossed his arms over his chest. He wasn’t denying it. He really did have more than what he did time for. “I can take it.”

           “What are you talking about?” Balthazar didn’t want to believe that such a perfect man would be trouble. They did say bad boys were sexier; he never thought he would find that to be true accidently. He didn’t even know Benny was a bad boy. No, he couldn’t be; he’s a sweetheart.

             The other two ignored his mental battle. They were too busy arguing about things Balthazar couldn’t understand. If he had read the contents in the manilla envelope, he was sure it would be a different story. All he could tell was that they had both done questionable things in the past. Benny was willing to get in trouble for more than he already did in order to be rid of Andrea. That said a lot about how he felt about her. If he was that willing to get rid of her, she had to see it was over. After some more arguing, Balthazar could see there was sadness behind Andrea’s eyes. Benny wasn’t budging and Andrea could now tell he was serious.

           “Really?” Her voice softened no longer sounding angry at all. “You hate me that much?”

             “I don’t hate you. I just don’t love you anymore, Andrea.” Benny told her.“You were someone that made me want to get out of that life; not drag you into it. Now, I don’t know who you are anymore.”

           “We were so good together.”

          “Once.” Benny shook his head and looked away from her. “But not anymore.”

            Balthazar wasn’t sure if he should continue standing there. The whole mood had gotten really depressing and despite her craziness, he felt a little bad for Andrea. It sounded like they once were really in love. Of course, they weren’t any longer and Balthazar was a little glad about it. Nothing was permanent; this was something Balthazar always knew. Everything ended just like him and Inias. Everything had an expiration date.

           “Fine.”Andrea said looking down at her feet. “I’ll go. No need to call the cops. I’m gone.”

            She walked away slowly and didn’t look back once. Benny sighed and looked a little sad but said nothing. Balthazar supposed despite her changes, there may have been some lingering affection. Maybe it was the love Benny had for her old self. Balthazar chose to ignore the bad feeling he felt when he thought of Benny still having feelings for her.

           “Balth, I’m sorry.” Benny finally turned to him looking a little ashamed and worried. “When you hired me, I was really fortunate. You didn’t need an application; nothing.”

             “If I required one, what would I have learned?”

            “I’ve made mistakes but I’m not the same as that anymore.” Benny told him and all he could do was nod. He had the manilla envelope in his desk. It held all the secrets he wanted to learn but he knew it wouldn’t be right. Part of him felt that if Benny wanted to tell him, he would listen but he wouldn’t force it out of him. He also wouldn’t go looking in on the information without his consent. It was strange because he wanted to learn about Andrea and his relationship; that was the only reason he got the background check done. He didn’t expect such a heavy envelope and such an ominous warning from his cousin.

            “I believe you.” Balthazar knew when Benny was ready, he’d tell him the whole thing. He would get rid of that envelope; it was foolish to even gather all that information. “I don’t need to know what you did. You just need to keep coming into work and live your new life.”

            “Balth, you are an angel.” Benny smiled genuinely and wrapped an arm around his shoulder. Balthazar could feel the heat from the man’s arm burning through his shirt onto his shoulder. This was too much stimulation for a man of his age. “A true angel. You always have my back and I want you to know, no matter what, I’ll always have yours.”

           “Always?” What a ridiculous thing to say. Balthazar knew nothing was permanent. Anyone with two cents knew nothing in the world lasts forever. Why was Benny so sure they would always be around each other? Did he not think they would move on and maybe he’d get a job elsewhere and Balthazar would fantasize about someone else? Looking at his face, Balthazar knew the answer. Benny genuinely believed in this always. But that wasn’t the most frightening part. What scared Balthazar more was that part of him wanted to believe in it too.


	11. Rule Number 10: Don't Fall In Love

             Why did he feel so great when Benny said they would always have each other’s backs? Balthazar should have been horrified by the thought of the commitment that entailed. Sure, it wasn’t like he was marrying the man but always? Always? There couldn’t be an always. There never was an always. People came and people went; that was just how life worked. Nothing was going to change just because they said always. So, why did he think about it so much? Why did he like the idea so much?

            He needed to find a place to clear his head. Usually that meant he would find his cousin Castiel and lay on his couch for a while. Castiel was a kind soul that never asked why Balthazar was in the mood to stare at the ceiling. Even now as he held Balthazar’s head in his lap, he didn’t ask questions but it just wasn’t the same. The feeling now was so different.

           “Cassie, why did you move?”

           “It’s cost effective.” Castiel told him stroking his hair once or twice like he would if his cat was in the same position Balthazar was in. It use to be comforting and helped Balthazar to think but how could he think while there was strange things hanging off the ceiling and the smell of candy all about?

            “But you live with gummy bears.” As he spoke, Gabriel chose that time to enter the living room with a bag of m&ms.

             “Excuse you?” He looked pretty offended but Balthazar decided to play dumb.

            “What? Did you say something?.” Balthazar sat up on the couch as Gabriel glared at him for some reason. A sigh interrupted whatever silent communication Gabriel was trying to send his way. Standing up from the couch, Castiel brushed off his lap. Balthazar still felt offended when he did so. He knew it was out of habit since he did the same when his cat sat in his lap, but he wasn't a cat! There was no fur that he would be shedding and if Balthazar was shedding, his age was coming after him sooner than he thought.

            “Cassie, don’t go.” Gabriel begged and suddenly Balthazar felt curious.

             “Don’t go where?”

             “Dean and I are going on a date.” Castiel was all smiles like a bride on her wedding day, It was the cutest thing Balthazar ever witnessed. But he was dressed in such lame clothes. They were the same things he wore every other day and they were most definitely not the proper attire for a date.

             “Well, then you have to look amazing then.” Balthazar stood up from the bed and gestured to Castiel’s new room. Gabriel was quick to jump up and protest.

            “No, he doesn’t.”

           “I’m sorry. Did I ask for your opinion?” There was no way Balthazar was going to let the lost member of the lollipop guild mess with his ship. It was a long a hard journey to get to where they were now and not in the fun way. Balthazar had to suffer through so many feels during this whole will they won’t they fiasco and there was no way Gabriel was going to ruin it.

          Without another word, Balthazar hurried Castiel out of the room. He was going to make him look gorgeous and Dean would never forget it. He would want to jump his cousin’s bones for sure. But Gabriel kept getting in the way and stopping Balthazar from going through Castiel’s boxes.

           “Don't kiss on the first date.” Gabriel told Castiel while Balthazar was trying to find a suitable shirt.

            “Do whatever you want, Cassie.” Balthazar wasn’t going to have Gabriel ruin this night for Castiel. The first box didn’t hold anything promising. Balthazar did always have an extra pair of clothes that he had with him. He always did keep some spare clothes nearby just in case a nice opportunity presented itself. It wouldn’t be right to go to work in the same clothes as before. Though, it wasn’t like he hadn’t done that before either. However, he liked being prepared but that would be for an emergency. Just in case, Castiel didn’t have anything good enough.

           “No, don’t kiss on the first date.” Gabriel insisted ignoring Balthazar’s annoyed look. “It’s a rule.”

          “That is just some rule to suppress other people’s sexualities.”Balthazar patted Castiel on the shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile. What kind of person would he be if he didn’t want his OTP to have a home run? That of course would mean there would be much more than just kissing. Balthazar wasn’t about to think of his cousin that way but those two needed to be together as soon as possible. A date is a date but that won’t destroy all that unresolved sexual tension. So, of course, he wanted them to have a home run but he wasn’t going to pressure his cousin. “Do what you feel is right.”

            “No, I looked it up, Balthazar.” Castiel told him very seriously. “It’s a rule.”

             The internet was apparently a horrible place at times. Balthazar couldn’t believe that sort of rubbish was on there. However, Castiel did seem quite adamant about it so, he supposed he would have to be patient again. He didn’t understand his cousin. If he had a chance to be on a date with the one he was crazy about, there was no way he would wait. Wait. Crazy about? Balthazar had no one he was crazy about, he never fell in love. So, why did he imagine Benny and him having a date just then?

             Going over to Castiel’s to clear his head didn’t work. Even looking for clothes and arguing about dating with Gabriel didn’t fix anything. Balthazar was still more confused than ever. The whole time he couldn’t avoid thoughts of Benny and even when he tried to flush those thoughts away, he couldn’t be rid of them entirely. He found himself feeling jealous when he saw Castiel run off to his date. Not because of Dean. Balthazar seriously wouldn’t consider Dean even remotely his type it didn’t matter how long the man’s eyelashes were.He was jealous because he wanted that and he knew exactly who he wanted it with.

             But why did he feel this way? He couldn’t figure it out. It wasn’t like him to be so fixated on someone. Was it because he knew he could never have Benny? Maybe the whole idea that he was unattainable made Balthazar crave him more but to want him to date him? He never wanted that with anyone and Balthazar had met his share of unattainable men. So, why was Benny getting to him so much?

             It was hard going to sleep when your thoughts were constantly on someone who you didn’t want to be thinking about. It was hard going to work knowing you would have to see said person but Balthazar was the owner of that bookstore/cafe and he wasn’t going to watch it get into trouble because he was acting like a teenager. So, he showed up to work that day like any other. He tried his best to seem unaffected when Benny passed by him to start preparing for the store to open. He was the owner of this place, he had to focus on his work.

            If Benny noticed him acting different, he didn’t say anything. Aside from small knowing smiles, Ruby said nothing either. This was good. This was something Balthazar could handle; living in denial. For a while it had been Dean’s favorite place to live but he supposed it was his turn to stay there since it was recently vacated. He knew he was fooling himself but it was better than thinking of the alternative.

           It just didn’t settle right with him. Why would he be focusing this much on a man that wasn’t even his type? Sure, Benny had the sexiest voice he had ever heard that elicited so many glorious fantasies in his mind but was it really that great that he had to focus on it? Was it really that important that he had felt such an array of emotions from the time he met Benny to now? What was going on? Balthazar couldn’t even enjoy the things he use to do. It troubled him. Since the night Benny came and took him from the club, he hadn’t step foot inside one again. He just didn’t feel like it. This wasn’t like him at all. Why was he acting so strangely?

             He took to Castiel’s method of coping. He hadn’t even noticed he was cleaning the same spot on the counter until someone cleared their throat. This was his life now. He was as pathetic as his cousin was when Dean wasn’t around. Looking up, Balthazar almost jumped back in surprise. He was expecting a regular customer or maybe Benny coming to ask what was wrong with him. What he hadn’t been expecting was Inias to come back here after everything that has happened. He said he would leave him alone from here on in. What was this stupid boy thinking?

           “Why are you here?” Balthazar growled low making sure he wasn’t too loud. He couldn’t cause a scene in his own store. Also, he didn’t want Benny to know of Inias being here. It would just make him cause a scene instead. That wouldn’t help bring in customers, that was for sure.

            “I’m just returning some things.” Inias dropped a bag on the counter. It was strange because Balthazar never left anything at anyone’s house. In fact, when he met with Inias it was usually at his own place. Cautiously, he opened the bag and suddenly he realized something. He had been missing a few items in his apartment. He thought he had just misplaced them but apparently they found their way into this bag.

             “Really?” Balthazar pulled out his old toothbrush and stared at Inias. This was a whole new level of desperate.

             “I’m sorry.” Inias looked down ashamed as he should be. People should never resort to this type of creepy behavior. He really needed to learn what relationships were all about and how he shouldn’t be a creepy stalker. That wouldn’t make people want to flock to him. “I don’t know what else to say.”

            “Maybe your number.” A smooth voice made both Balthazar and Inias turn to look at the new man in the room. “I’d like to hear that.”

             “Lucifer.” Balthazar groaned. Why did he choose this time to come over here? Balthazar didn’t want a show being put on in front of everyone. Lucifer was known for his antics and his over dramatic acting. Usually, it was with Michael but if Balthazar knew one thing it was never trust a Milton. They were a family of little schemers always looking to prank, horrify or control you. They were his cousins and Balthazar loved them dearly but they were all like children and he was in no mood to babysit.

           “Lucifer?” Inias looked terrified by the thought that a man with the same name as satan was near him.

           “That’s right just like the devil.” Lucifer told him with a wicked grin that promised all sorts of naughty behaviour. “Tell me your number gorgeous and I’ll show you how wicked I can be.”

           “Hurry, Inias.” Balthazar noticed how frightened Inias was and despite what had occurred between them, he wasn’t willing to throw him to the wolves. “Just go.”

          “Balth.” Lucifer pouted as Inias quickly hurried out of the building. “Why did you just let him leave? Don’t want to share?”

            “He’s young and stupid. Leave him alone.” Inias was a silly boy with creepy tendencies but that was what he was: a boy. He was merely in his early twenties trying to figure out the world. He had been thrust into this real world without anyone to show him the ropes. Relationships, college, bills, work were all new territory for him. He would grow and learn as the years went by. There was some hope for him and he wasn’t going to allow Lucifer to swallow all that hope. “Besides it wouldn’t be sharing; I’m done with him.”

          “So, tell me his number.” Lucifer insisted. Balthazar gave out a very long and irritated sigh.

          “No. Why are you here?”

          “Michael and I are visiting Castiel today.” Lucifer was standing around his cafe looking quite proud of himself but there was no one else around him. Was Michael in the restroom? Balthazar sincerely hoped not because he wasn’t sure if Ruby bothered to check if they were okay and knowing Michael’s raging OCD, he could be having a heart attack in there.

          “Where’s Michael?” Balthazar looked around one last time

          “He kicked me out of the car.”

          “Can’t say I blame him.” To be honest, Balthazar wasn’t sure why Michael thought being stuck with Lucifer in such a small area would be alright. Lucifer was known to harass others but being that they were so close, Lucifer made it his duty to always harass Michael. He probably wouldn’t do it so often if Michael didn’t overreact to every little thing.

          “Anyway, I thought I would swing by and say hi.” That couldn’t be right. Lucifer always had a motive. He was always up to something and this time was no different. With a sly smile, he asked “How’s Benny?”

          “He’s fine.” Balthazar kept a neutral face trying not to give away anything about his feelings. Feelings? When did this happen to be about feelings?

          “Anyone come looking for him?” Lucifer pressed on.

          “Just Andrea but I think she’s going to leave him alone now.” Balthazar told him hoping that would be enough. Instead, Lucifer just stared at him with this look that said he knew so much more than Balthazar and didn’t believe a word he said. “What?”

          “Oh, nothing.” That look was definitely something but of course, Lucifer wasn’t going to tell him.“Just don’t get mixed up with the wrong sort.”

          “You are the wrong sort, Lucifer.” Balthazar reminded him.

           “I’m the best sort.” Finally, after that little chat, Lucifer actually ordered something. He didn’t even bother to speak to Ruby on his way out; the energy drink she gave him must have destroyed all the want he had for her. Perhaps he should offer it to him next time he dropped by the cafe. Maybe that would stop him from bothering him.

           But his words did bother Balthazar a little. Lucifer knew everything about Benny and he didn’t. He could go into his office now that Benny’s break was up. He could just open that envelope and learn everything he wanted about Benny. He was tempted too. The moment Benny approached the counter, he went to his office. It would be so simple. No one would know. Besides, it was common for an employer to do a background check. Holding the envelope in his hand, Balthazar could've easily looked inside but he decided against it. He should shred this envelope and all its contents. Perhaps that was exactly what he was going to do before the door to his office opened. 

          “What are you doing back here?” Benny asked curiously. Quickly, Balthazar stuffed the envelope in his desk.

          “Just doing my owner duties.”

           “Need any help?” Benny entered the office and Balthazar almost panicked.

          “No, I-” Don’t look suspicious. Balthazar shook his head and smiled.  “I’m fine, thank you.”

          He had to get himself together. It wasn’t like Benny would force him to open his desk drawers and show him what was inside. Besides, it wasn’t like he had blackmail information or anything. He was pretty sure whatever was in that envelope was public knowledge anyway. So, there shouldn’t be any problem. So, why did he feel so guilty.

         “There is something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.” Benny unfolded the chair from the corner and sat down.

         “What is that?”

          “You don’t have any problem with, you know, coworkers dating?” Hearing Benny mention something like that made Balthazar’s heart sink.

           “What?” Coworkers? Was it Ruby? Couldn’t be Ruby. She was so young and besides he never saw him even speak to her. It must have been Charlie that he has his eye on. She did lend him that suit before. “Charlie’s gay.”

          “Not Charlie.” So, it was Ruby then. She was strange but she was a good person. Ruby was lucky to have Benny like her and Balthazar really shouldn’t worry about it. He shouldn’t. So, why did he feel like crap?

          “There’s no policy.” He uttered having a hard time finding his words. Why was this so hard? Why couldn’t he just deal with it like any other thing? “What you do in your personal life has nothing to do with your work life. As long as you work hard still, there should be no problem.”

          “And that’s with any coworker no matter if they higher or below you?” It had to be Ruby then. Benny worked in the cafe and no one in the cafe was above are below anyone. Benny never treated anyone there any different. However, Ruby worked at the register and maybe because she wasn’t part of the cafe and was one of the first employees, Benny may erroneously think she was above him.

          “Well, I never really thought of any of you below or above anyone else but yes. I suppose it doesn’t matter either way as long as it doesn’t bother your work.” It hurt so much to say those words. It hurt so much when he saw Benny smile so genuinely afterwards.

           “Thanks, Balth.” And he left as soon as he came. Balthazar had no work to be done in his office but he stayed there. He just couldn’t leave it; not after hearing what Benny said. Ruby was a lucky girl. She really was. Why did it hurt so much? Benny was just another man. He had met many gorgeous men and none of them were any different. They came and they went. So, what? But Benny really wasn’t like those men. Somehow he had wormed his way into Balthazar’s dreams. It would have been fine if he would have just stayed put there but no, he had to go deeper.He had to strike Balthazar at his core. There was no more denial left for him. He had to face the facts; he was in love with Benny.

          Now, he didn’t know how he could even talk to him. How could he even supervise his store anymore knowing that Ruby will be with Benny? Maybe she would reject him. Benny was a bit old for her. He couldn’t believe how low he had gotten that he hoped that Benny would experience heartache. But it was better that way. Better Benny than him.

          How could he have let this happen? When did this happen? When did Benny become more than an employee. He was never just an employee. Had Balthazar been in love with him from the start? It was foreign and he didn’t like it. He never felt this way about anyone. He never thought he could feel this way. It scared him and he wasn’t sure how he should continue on like this. How did anyone continue on with these feelings and thoughts. How was someone supposed to sleep when their head was filled with thoughts of another person? How were they supposed to act normal when their heart quickened every time they saw them? How could he have let this happen to him? How could he become incapacitated by love? How was he even functioning?

          Benny was his first love and would most probably become his first heartache. As much as he wanted Ruby to reject him, he couldn’t see why she would. Age wasn’t even an issue; he had dated plenty of men Ruby’s age and he was older than Benny. This was all so wrong. Balthazar couldn’t believe how awful everything suddenly became. With the thought that Benny would be with another, not even food tasted good anymore. Nothing was good anymore. If this was what love did to people, he wished he never experienced it. He wished it would just go away but no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t get away. He couldn’t control it. He was lost to it just like his aunt. He failed to keep his heart closed.

          Ruby didn’t seem different the next day but then again she never seemed different. She always had that same bored expression everyday. Perhaps Benny didn’t talk to her yet. The thought brought a bad taste to his mouth. Benny should just stay single all his life if he wasn’t going to go to him. Balthazar shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about Benny. And cursing his love life now?  What was he becoming? Castiel? Naomi? He sincerely hoped he wouldn’t be like Naomi. But that last thought was certainly a thought Naomi would have had. This was messed up! He had to control it somehow. Will it away. There had to be some method. This couldn’t be how he was expected to live the rest of his life.

          “Your phone.” Ruby’s voice snapped him out of whatever trance he was in. Was he doing it again? Was he really wiping the same spot on the counter just like Castiel? There were even customers in the cafe. Fortunately, they already ordered and were eating but he shouldn’t have zoned out like that. Dean and Castiel were there too inside a booth being lovey dovey and he hadn’t even tried to spy on them. They were his OTP and he didn’t even get to enjoy the satisfaction of seeing his OTP in action.

          Wait, what did Ruby want from him again? The ringing of his phone finally gave him his answer. His phone. Someone was calling him. He should probably pick it up. Yes, that’s what people normally did when the phone rang. Looking at the ID he saw Benny was the one calling. Benny. He’s the whole reason why Balthazar was a mess.

           “Benny, you can’t make it tomorrow or something?” Balthazar tried not to sound hopeful. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see Benny but the less time he spends at the cafe, the less opportunity he has to see Ruby.

          “No, I can.” Benny assured him. “I just wanted to ask you a question.”

          “Ruby is off tonight.” Balthazar hadn’t meant to cut him off. He hadn’t meant to blurt that out either but he was upset. Why else would Benny call during work hours. It had to be to see what everyone’s schedule was.

          “Why would I want to know when Ruby’s off?” Benny sounded really confused. “No offence but she’s a bit young a weird for my tastes.”

          “What is it then?” If it wasn’t Charlie or Ruby, who was it? Balthazar hadn’t hired many women and the new girl wasn’t someone Benny ever met.

          “I was wondering when you were off.”

           “I’m the owner.  I can take off whenever I choose. We do have a good number of employees that will be in bright spirits to work this week.” Balthazar stole a glance at Dean and Castiel. Castiel certainly will be in bright spirits this week. “Why does it matter?”

          “ I was wondering if tonight you would like to go to dinner with me. Or maybe see a movie.”

          “I beg your pardon?” He had to have heard wrong. Benny was straight. There was no way this was anything more than platonic. It couldn’t be more than that.

 

          “You know, like, a date.”

 

           Everything just seemed to stop when he heard that. Balthazar didn’t even know how to respond but before he could say anything his phone made a noise. Looking at it, he realized his cheek had hung up the phone. He hung up on Benny. Benny, who he was in love with and just asked him on a date. He just ruined everything! Without even thinking or remembering the many customers in his cafe, Balthazar let out the unmanliest sounding scream.


End file.
